


Fallout Effect

by FallingOverSideways



Series: Far Beyond the Star [2]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Crossover, Dogs, F/F, F/M, Fanart, M/M, Monster of the Week, Shepard Twins (Mass Effect), Shepard’s sad backstory, alternative universe, biotic booty, completed fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-06-13 01:53:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 65,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15353622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallingOverSideways/pseuds/FallingOverSideways
Summary: War? War never changes.John Shepard was ready to fight this last war with the slimmest hope of a happy ending, but now he's hundreds of years in the future, trekking across the wasteland of civilization to save one of his closest friends. Searching for news of his crew, he finds he might get his white picket fence in a place he never dreamed of.





	1. I Don’t Want To Set The World On Fire

 

 

  
~N7~

The battleground has narrowed in his vision by the time they escape the worst of the enemy using hidden passageways created by debris. Not an ideal route, but they keep pushing forward. The town is far enough removed from DC and Richmond that it took the Reapers weeks to get here, but they’re making their way through it quickly with their incinerating beams and ground troops.   
  
Commander John Shepard is choking on the very air by the time a small construction site comes into view at the end of the row houses, his helmet long since lost in battle.

EDI is ruthlessly shooting down swarms of the enemy and Garrus is right behind her despite his injuries. The earthshaking blare of Reaper’s horn follows them through the carcasses of buildings and townhouses, mud sucking at their boots, littered with things that no one wants to look too closely at. The debris clears more as they get to the end of the street where an old church sits next to abandoned trucks and short towers of prefabs.

The Omni-Tool on his wrist beeps and updates, and Shepard follows the cursor in his eyepiece to the untouched graveyard beyond the church and it’s tall steeple. "Garrus! You falling behind?"

The turian snipes a husk as it jumps from a bodega’s blown out front, killing it before it reaches Shepard. "Me? Nah. Just thought I'd take the scenic route!"

"Good! Because we're almost there!"

Running through the church and ducking out through the room behind the altar, they lose their enemies for the moment, but never slow down. A chain link fence surrounds one of the larger mausoleums on the side nearest the trucks, tucked away down by a small river and Shepard follows the cursor right to it.

"Isn't this where you bury your dead? Morbid, one could say."

"Maybe. Maybe now's not the time to try your hand at poetry!" Shepard side eyed Garrus.

They make it inside before anything else sees them and slide the door closed. The door is camouflaged rock on the outside and inside is a room made of some sort of composite metal leading to a set of wide stairs. "EDI?"

"This matches the Intel Admiral Hackett sent us. The energy readings are coming from below us, a mile deep." She walks to the elevator and starts investigating the computer beside it as Garrus and Shepard guard the door. "It looks like the admiral informed them of our arrival."

"Great. Let's see why Anderson wants us here and then get back to the LZ." Shepard storms into the opening elevator. "I want to pick up the rest of the crew before the crucible fires."

Garrus stares at him as the doors slide shut and they descend. Shepard avoids his gaze as EDI watches them curiously. "Think we can actually make it?"

Shepard's jaw flexes as his teeth clench, eyes bright and voice hoarse from more than the ash outside. "We have to."

"I understand the importance of being with loved ones, Shepard, when...it happens, but if Councilor Anderson is correct, what we're here for is important to everyone after the Reapers blow." Garrus’ voice is somber.

The commander forcibly relaxes his shoulders and breathes out slowly. "Right." The doors ping and open. "Let's do this."

Outside the elevator is a large cavern cut out of rock with air that leaves fine dirt lining their mouths, and through the leftover construction equipment is a path to a Vault door. The heavy gear shaped Vault-Tec door is already sliding out and off the front of the Vault to the flashing of orange lights and a recorded warning to be cautious. Inside a walkway is sliding into place as they approach. Vault personnel wait for them wearing the customary blue and gold suits, some with lab coats and others with security gear.

Unlike other Vaults Shepard has seen, there are no numbers on the large Vault door or the suits the inhabitants wear to indicate which Vault it is. If Shepard were to hazard a guess, either they hadn’t the time to finish and designate a number, or it had been redacted for security.

A woman wearing an unbuttoned Alliance uniform comes from the security office to the side of the receiving room as they enter. She stands tall and offers a handshake in lieu of a salute. "Commander. I'm glad you made it. David was worried you wouldn't get here in time. I'm Kahlee Sanders."

Shepard shakes her hand. "I recognize the name. Anderson-" The Vault door behind them moves with a heavy roll and a hiss as it seals shut. "I need you to keep that door open. We're only here to secure the mission, we have to make it back ship-side by nightfall."

Sanders stares at him, hard. Her lips thin before she lets loose a deep sigh. "Come with me. We still have communication with London, I'll hail David."

Since the moment David Anderson commed him at zero three hundred, his gut has been burning, and as they follow her through monitoring equipment and more personnel, his skin starts to crawl. "So, how long has the Alliance been playing nice with Vault Tec? We practically went to war after they stole technology for their field testing."

"Not everyone doubted you when you first warned us about the Reapers. Hackett and David were the spearheads, but you have some strong allies with a lot of power. Vault Tec got the supplies and the labor they needed, as long as they gave us Vaults for our people." Sanders pauses at the entryway to the overseer's office, eyes lost on the door. "We weren't sure the outcome of this war." She looks at them over her shoulder. "We prepared for the worst. The arks we built for space were found and we lost eighty percent. The few that survived well enough we sent deep into the ocean and underground. They haven’t been found yet, but we needed a Plan B."

Entering the office, Shepard hunts immediately for the com unit and hurries over to it, dialing with his Omni-Tool as he goes. An old radio is playing music on the desk, so he dials down the volume for the call. Static dances on the screen, words are mumbled and finally...finally they have a clear enough connection that Shepard can see and hear his mentor. Instead of a war room, Shepard sees the com room on the Normandy and behind Anderson...

"Kaidan?"

The other man is smiling wistfully at him, eyes wet. "John, hey. How's the tide?"

Shepard's eyes burn, emotion caught in his throat. The words are cheesy, but familiar to them from shared stories of childhood. His Commander persona slips back into place after a hard minute. "The riptide is hard, but the surface is smooth and the wind strong. You?"

"Got my port." Kaidan's smile wobbles and now Shepard hears the ringing in his ears for what it is.

"What's going on?" Shepard glares at Anderson, fighting the feeling of betrayal.

The other man stares at him a moment, fond and sad. "I asked you to go to a hidden location to secure something that would help us after we win this war. We all knew the blast from the Reapers is going to be devastating, but we only realized months ago that it’s going to be worse than we thought. Billions of people, all races, are going to die despite this win. The people that survive this? They'll need one of the most powerful diplomats, the most cunning tacticians-"

As Anderson speaks, Kaidan's smile widens and suddenly Shepard can’t look away.

"...and the biggest hearts. I'm so sorry, son. But I knew you or your sister wouldn't abandon your people. I swear on my life, if I could have gotten them to you in time, I would have."

“Janey?”

“She found out what I was trying to do and went off the grid. I sent her the coordinates for the original Vault you were scheduled for, but, I just don’t know.”

"John.” Kaidan is staring at him hard as the screen starts losing clarity and his voice comes and goes. Whatever last words Kaidan has for him are lost. “-ll meet——by—sh-." Shepard rests his hand over his chest, just off center from his heart and rubs with the heel of his hand as he fights to breathe.

Just that morning they’d had their normal routine of Shepard waking to the sight of his lover listening to his heartbeat and waiting for coffee to brew, the biotic’s warm hands tracing the compass rose tattoo over his heart.

The com regains its strength and Kaidan looks stricken as he watches him struggle.

“JOHN-“ The image fizzles and along with it, the major’s words.

“I never told you about this one. You always wondered, but I wasn’t ready. It’s you, Kaidan. You’re my true north.”

The feed fizzles, and comes back before going down all together. Silence suffocates the room, no one dares to speak.

"Shepard."

John stares at the blank screen, lungs burning and the ringing in his ears blocking everything out.

"Shepard. I'm sorry, but we need to go."

"Spirits. EDI, help me get him- just, yes, thank you."

Dazed, John stares blankly at Garrus as the conversation around him started to lose clarity, voices blending together in nonsense. "Tali. Tali's on the Normandy, Garrus."

"I. I know, Shepard."

"EDI."

"Yes, Commander?"

"Joker. Who's going to, who's going to-" Shepard tried to focus on the world around him.

"Here, give this to him."

"What is that?"

"It'll sedate him. Anderson made arrangements."

"What kind of arrangements?"

"EDI. No one's there to laugh at his jokes." Desperation clawed at Shepard.

"I rarely laugh at his jokes, Commander."

"But-"

"The fallout from the Reaper’s destruction will take decades to clear, at the very least. We have some cryo-tanks in a satellite wing. The crew and civilians will maintain the Vault, but we weren’t finished building and don’t have all our supplies. It’s best if we get you squared away ASAP-"

"I'm not sure I like where this is going."

"Unfortunately, you're stuck with it. We have barely any dextro food, David planned for all of you to go to a different Vault. One purely for Alliance personnel. But everyone got split up when the Reapers went after the crucible and the remaining arks."

"What about Joker?"

"Word is there was no way he'd leave the Normandy."

"Here, Commander. This will help."

What little filters into the space around him fades away before he can comprehend it and strangely, the last thing he hears is the gentle warble from the radio.

 

“~I’ve Lost All Ambition For Worldly Acclaim,  
                I Just Want To Be The One You Love~”

~*N7*~

  
Two figures descend down a narrow staircase, boots clanging on metal and the only light is from the Pip-Boy computers on their wrists. The unexpected staircase leads to a single room, fairly large from what the green light reveals, an elevator tucked away in one corner that must be the main entrance denied to them from the earlier cave-in they’d encountered. The first figure curses and smacks his hand blindly against the wall as they reach the bottom, his other hand tight on his pistol.

"Problems there, buddy?"

As soon as the man finds the light switch and clears the small room, he turns to glare at his companion. "Don't just stand there! Those radroaches are coming from somewhere and I'm not about to be ambushed by a fucking nest."

"Pretty sure that's mole rats and not radroaches." The second figure carries her weapon loosely in her grip and wanders over to the desk by a door across from where they'd come down."What's down here anyway?"

"Like I know. I'm usually on the surface looking out for goddamn raiders when I’m not fixing everyone’s damn generators."

The woman browsing the old computer muttered, "No wonder you're so jumpy."

"What was that?"

"I said getting this door open should be no trouble."

The glorified security guard scowls, but moves to inspect the door. It’s like any typical Vault-Tec door, except there seems to be no sign of touch ups or patch jobs. "It's listed for operating personnel only, but Hammond is dealing with those angry traders and Jackson is still tying up agreements with Vault 80."

The woman hums, fingers tapping away at the keyboard with efficiency.

"Where...did you say you were normally posted?"

She shrugs. "I didn't. There. We're in. Looks like this room is from before The War. Hmmm. Anderson. Interesting."

"What? What's interesting?" The man is instantly hanging over her shoulder, only to be shoved off with a pointed finger.

"It looks like this room was originally sealed by the original Overseer. Priority One." A couple more clicks and then there was the hiss of the door unlocking, a brief moment where the metal groaned heavily before sliding into the ceiling and floor with a clunk they felt in the back of their teeth. The woman gets up and strides through the door curiously as the first figure follows with his gun still drawn.

The next room is long with a vaulted ceiling, storage containers and lockers lining one side and large pipes running along the other. The woman gives a curious glance to the containers, but keeps on forward until they reach the end and another door. This door slides open with a similar hiss and clunk, but without any hacking needed. The room beyond is huge, even by vault standards, and is filled with cryo-tanks and the sounds of equipment keeping them active.

"Whoa." The man keeps his gun at the ready, but eagerly follows her, staring at the old world technology like a kid at the market. "I only ever heard about these! Are they still even functioning properly?"

Moving to a computer at the nearest tank, she lowers the keyboard on the computer and starts typing, not giving the dust a first look. Behind her, the man sneezes violently.

"Well, no radroaches. And it looks like no one's been down here since they first sealed the Vault. Should we continue? We can tell Hammond later. Man, Jackson’s going to cream himself." The man is shifting his feet, eager to move on.

"Hold on." Tap tap tap tap. "Wow."

It wasn't the word but how it was uttered that grabbed his attention.

"WHAT?"

”Maybe you should try some calming tea, Delan. You’d live longer.”

“What-?”

“They're from the first line of defense in The War. Stationed on the Normandy herself. Councilor Anderson had them sequestered down here before the Reapers blew. Here're their names, a list of their training and specialties. And-" She laughed. "And a note at the bottom."

"What does it say, Traynor?" The man suddenly didn't feel like leaving, staring through the thick glass of a nearby tank and the white gas inside. Inside was a human face, classically handsome and lined with small scars. He wore what must have been an Alliance uniform.

"Break glass in case of emergency."

 

 


	2. Way Back Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback and a rude awakening for Shepard.

The cabin’s lights are dimmed to almost nothing, the glow of the loft’s aquarium and computer illuminating just enough to prevent stubbed toes, making Kaidan’s view of space over the bed a breathtaking thing. John had once admitted he’d been worried he’d suffer from some sort of astrophobia after his death on the previous Normandy, but the commander had only struggled with tight spaces or areas with limited air.

Being an N7 had helped him to take his new challenges head on and eventually get over those new fears. Kaidan had felt remorse for not being there to help him, but knew that things couldn’t have gone down any other way than they had. Maybe if Kaidan hadn’t lost himself to work after the first Normandy...but he learned long ago speculating didn’t get you anywhere.

They had this, now.

Waking up before John and the alarm is something he is unconsciously training himself to do. Because then he can slide down and rest his head right here, over John’s heart. Trail his hands over scars, test the skin for the barely discernible different textures where Cerberus weaved it back together. Catch wiry chest hair under his nails. Trace the tattoo.

He knows what ticklish areas to avoid as he explores innocently and just…

Just...

It’s still hard to believe John is back. That he’s John now. That they have this. Oh, they’d fumbled plenty when their relationship was new, it still is, but they’ve laughed about it and figured out where they fit. For the most part. Finding someone in times like these isn’t hard, but finding someone who had been a good friend first, that fits you like a puzzle piece? Kaidan is nurturing by nature, and while John is a strong person in so many ways, at the end of the day he is a person who can appreciate that.

Shifting his head on John’s chest, Kaidan lets out a pleased hum as his partner starts to wake. It took them only a few times to realize that lowering the temperature before bed allowed them sweat free cuddling throughout the night.

Kaidan feels John yawn and give subtle stretches to each limb to waken them. He smiles wide as one large hand threads through his hair and the other cups his ass cheek, the heel of a thumb rubbing circles right above it.

“Hmm. Wake yet? Or are you sleep groping me now?”

The hand massages the flesh and muscle underneath it and Kaidan can’t help but give a small laugh and snuggle closer, threading his leg through John’s and rubbing them together. As much as he likes the smooth feeling of a woman’s leg, there is something about the feel of his partner’s leg hair against his.

“Depends. Did the coffee brew yet?”

Kaidan looks off to the bedside table where John has stashed a pair of single brew coffee makers, a mug under each one. When he’d first started dating John, there’d only been one. When the second one appeared, Kaidan had answered the unasked question by bringing up all of his things from the crew’s quarters and the Starboard Lounge.

“Nope.”

A gusty sigh tickles his hair onto his forehead. “Dammit.”

Chuckling, Kaidan moves just enough to pull up his Omni-Tool and start them remotely. As the machines whirl to life, a small bang comes from over by the desk.

“Did Boo escape again?”

Kaidan knows John can feel him raise an eyebrow against his chest. “You have a better vantage point, you tell me.”

“But that would require lifting my head.” John shifts down carefully a bit, so Kaidan’s face is level with his, and smirks. “And I’m so comfy.”

“Mm, morning, beautiful.”

“Morning, handsome.” A small peck hello. “Did you refill the tablets?”

Kaidan doesn’t have to look for the refresher pack on the side table to know they aren’t there. So much for early morning kisses without the morning breath. Sighing, he kisses the side of John’s neck. “No. But I know they’re down in cargo. I just got a little distracted yesterday.”

“I’m fine.”

Kaidan pokes the tender area where Dr. Chakwas had healed the gouge in John’s side.

“Ow.” And yup, there is the pout. Kaidan smiles at the pout and immediately kisses it.

Another bang, this time followed by a squeak and both look over to see the space hamster on one of the model ships. Again. “In another life, he’d have had his own ship.”

Kaidan rubs his side, redirecting his attention back to his partner. “No, but really. How’s the tide?”

John smiles gently, eyes filled with such affection, it makes Kaidan feel full. “Tide is running smooth, headed back out to sea.”

“Maybe-”

Maybes are never a thing one should discuss in war. It’s like you are already giving up and daydreaming about all the things you won’t get to do. But for them? Maybes are a promise. A list of things to do should they survive. “Maybe we can go visit the coast. I know you miss it.”

That is an understatement. When John talks of the few peaceful moments he had growing up, they are usually of him sitting out by the water, sometimes with Jane. More stressful days had him matching breaths to the ebb and flow of the waves.

“Maybe.” John cups Kaidan’s face where it hovers over his heart and kisses his forehead.

  
~*N7*~

  
When Shepard wakes, the air he breathes is wet. It slides in and out almost like water, thickly lining the walls of his mouth and throat, but his lungs take it in with ease. Not quite liquid, but thicker than any fog he’d been in, it tastes like the MRE packets he’d gotten when rising in the ranks of the N program. Rich with vitamins, protein, electrolytes. You name it, it was in there.

Only a man dying of hunger would find it appetizing.

It is shadowed, closed in where he is, but light filters in through a small window directly in front of him. The glass is thick and old, hard to see through, but as he starts to become aware, hissing surrounds him as real air fills the tank and sucks out the heavy gas.

The dryness of normal air catches inside his throat as the wall the small window is on lifts, and he starts coughing. The air keeps pouring in and stealing the gas away, and suddenly he realizes he’s cold. The kind of chill that takes forever to fade.

The wall is a door to the cylindrical pod he’s resting in, not an Alliance sleeper pod, but made similar. When the coughing abates enough, he focuses on his surroundings as he goes down a mental checklist.

Focusing is hard. It’s like his mind is struggling to wake. Not good for a soldier. Death for an N7.

And finally...

His limbs are shaky, he feels weak, but he can move. Climbing out of the pod, he manages a full breath, only to start coughing heavily again. Leaning against his former prison, he squints into the dim room. A few more pods line the wall next to his and across the room are haphazard storage containers and a desk with a computer system on it.

Patting himself he finds no weapons, only a bizarre suit similar to that of an undersuit. Wait. It looks like a Vault-Tec suit, but with Alliance logos and a hasty N7 patch.

Shepard’s head snaps up and he swings to peer into the pod next to his. Inside is the ugly mug of his best friend. “Fuck.” Trembling with adrenaline, he pulls the computer attached to Garrus’ pod towards him and starts investigating.

“Occupant: in stasis. Temporary thaw to treat injuries sustained in final battle, yadda yadda. FUCK.”

The date. Right there. From when they’d opened the turian’s pod, months after they’d entered the Vault.

Frantic and heart pounding, Shepard brings up his Omni-Tool. The holo-projection still works like a charm and nothing like the knock off Pip-Boys created by Vault-Tec from designs stolen from the Alliance.

No signal, though. No access to the extranet. Nothing. FUCK.

All the other pods are abandoned.

Making his way over to the computer on wobbly legs, he spies a light switch and illuminates the room, revealing concrete walls covered in pipes and machinery.

He’s so cold, but he can move, so he just keeps moving. The computer wakes reluctantly under his hands and he swipes at the built up dust before continuing. A loading screen emerges and stays. Shepard glares at it the more time goes by and angrily taps at the keys, then his Omni-Tool when it doesn’t change.

  
During the war it had taken them a while to learn that the Reapers were able to manipulate the majority of their own technology against them. Further investigations taught them the truth of what could have been their complete and utter downfall: all the great technology based off the Citadel’s, found by the older xeno races was actually engineered by the Reapers.

In the mad scramble to give themselves a fighting chance, earth had stopped using most of the technology made after the First Contact war that was based off such technology and returned to older tech designs. There’d been little time to make new, Reaper free tech, so they’d all dug out old world electronics and dusted it off for use.

It’d worked. Being used to the newer, faster tech drove everyone up the walls, but the crucible didn’t use such tech and when it fired, everything based on the Reaper tech blew.

Deciding he’d be selfish this once, he makes his way over towards Garrus, his stride more solid. At least the shakiness is leaving.

Reaching the pod, the computer finally chirps. Shepard looks at it curiously as he reaches for the pod controls, but then his Omni-Tool chirps in answer.

“I wouldn’t do that, Shepard.”

Eyebrows raising, Shepard looks around him for the AI’s mobile platform even though her voice comes from his Omni-Tool. “EDI?”

“Yes. I uploaded a part of my programming in case you wake before I return.”

“Return? Return from where?”

“Investigating the wasteland.”

Shepard half falls to sit on the floor as reality is replaced with a hard surrealism, and he leans against the cool metal of Garrus’ pod. “The wasteland?”

“Yes, that is what the survivors have called the world at large since they started rebuilding.”

“EDI.” His voice cracks and he feels overwhelmed in a way he hasn’t since Mindoir. Or the East Coast Reds. Fuck, even hearing about Akuze and knowing his sister was there. “EDI, I barely remember getting to the Vault. What happened?”

A pause. “Your vitals were off the charts when the call with Councilor Anderson and Major Alenko was disrupted. We were forced to sedate you and Kahlee insisted on immediately placing non-personnel in the cryo-tanks, since the Vault was short on resources. The Reapers and its swarms entered the area before they could finish building or fully supplying this Vault. I was in stasis for much of the first hundred years-“

“The first hundred. The first-“

EDI keeps silent as he curls in on himself against the pod and cries.

It takes him awhile to get himself under control and as long as he focuses on the information EDI feeds him and not what it means, he can move forward.

It has been over two hundred years since the crucible fired and destroyed all the Reapers. EDI had been ‘awake’ to see the beginning of the end, catching a glimpse before the chain reaction reached them and obliterated coms and satellites. No one could be hailed in the months that followed and the surface was far too radiated for them to venture out. They gave up after the first few years.

The Vault had been self-sufficient and managed to last that way, just barely, for many years. Then what resources they had became a problem, limited. They filled the empty pods to save themselves time, but it wasn’t enough in the end. They left the Vault when the radiation was just tolerable enough.

EDI fully emerged from her stasis to watch over them and gain information when the dwellers left. Six months ago she left to see if she could find out what happened to the Normandy, as well as to gather more information.

“I reprogrammed the pods so if the equipment started to fail, you would be woken, hopefully with time enough to either prolong Garrus’ pod or find an immediate dextro source.”

“Are there many turians or quarians in the wasteland?”

“No. There was little dextro available before the Reapers blew. Humans have crossbred several plants for multiple Levo food sources, but typically, very few plant sources survived the radiation storms. Most healthy seeds came from the Vaults that have opened since the worst of the fallout faded. The few dextro production sites from before the war were targeted early by the Reapers.”

“Do we have what we need in the Vault to repair his pod?”

“Not currently. I advise you to seek out the nearby settlements to see if they have the resources, but some of the needed items for repair will not be easily found.”

“Ok, Priority One: save Garrus’s scaly ass. Do you have any idea where you are now?”

“No. I have no connection to my mobile platform. This program is merely that: an information source for you to utilize.”

“Well, that explains your new sense of humor.”

“I’m afraid key personality traits did not carry over.”

Shepard sighs. “Where were you last headed?”

“A place the locals called The Hub. Several figureheads across what was once Northern America have been establishing long distance trade routes and setting up various forms of communication in hopes to boost civilization. The home base is called The Hub and run by someone only known as The Boss. I believe if anyone has information about dextro sources or parts for the repair, they’d be able to find it.”

The note he leaves for Garrus explains the outline of his plans and with EDI’s direction, programs the turian’s pod to open if the equipment expires before his own return. He opens the duffle bag the AI left for him and dons what armor she could find (basic Vault Security armor), checks out the pistol and shock baton, and eats a small portion of the included rations.

There’s a chemical station and lab on the third level with little to no supplies, but recipes for Radaway and other new world medicine to help him stay alive outside. The medigel still left in his Omni-Tool and the duffle bag is better left for dire situations, and learning to make Stimpaks will have to do. And he never thought he’d be grateful for his time with the Reds, but the instructions are simple for him to mix the chemicals once he has the necessary ingredients.

The Vault is ominous and ill kept, proof no one breathing has occupied it in a long while. Shepard scouts out the nearest room with a functional bed and crashes after securing the room. As much as he wants to get going right away, it sounds like a nightmarish landscape outside and he wants to be well rested for this mission.

Sleep doesn’t come easy and the silence is deafening. There’s a radio he turns on to make the room less lonely.

“EDI, are there people maintaining the stations out there?”

“Yes. Most major settlements have a DJ supplying music and news to listeners. It seems, however, that there is a limited selection of songs.”

Sighing heavily, he stares at the lit up front of the old radio from his bunk and tries not to let his thoughts run free.

“~I’m A Weary Exile,  
          Singing My Song Of Loneliness~”

His last thoughts are of his sister and the room they shared on Mindoir before they were raided. How they’d hated it at first, being spoiled by their own rooms when they’d lived in space with their mother before her career took off and dad died. They used to whisper to each other when they couldn’t sleep, or to keep the other awake for shits and giggles.

  
“~The Grass Is The Springiest,  
           The Bees Are The Stingiest,  
                  The Birds Are The Wingiest~”

Sometimes they’d sneak out the window and hangout on the roof of the porch, wondering up at the stars about mom and space and adventures.

Finding EDI and information about his sister would be Priority Two.

 

“~Way Back Home~”

 


	3. The Wanderer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard can be a little slow about personal matters. Good thing it’s generally the only thing he’s oblivious about as he starts out into the wasteland, discovering new enemies and a new way of life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are SO many xovers in this fic. Some are subtle and far reaching. Others are blatant. I don’t know why I’m so obsessed with xovers, but why not mash together all the things you love? See how many you can pick out!
> 
> Come say hi over at shotce.tumblr.com

“So Jane -Oh, hey. Sorry, Commander.”

Shepard looks up as soon as he has the tank top over his head to see Kaidan averting his eyes, cheeks turning pink. After they were forcibly parted on Alchera, the biotic had risen in Alliance ranks quickly due to the missions and tasks he underwent in space. Less time under a sun had rendered his skin translucent to embarrassment. Damn, the man’s adorable. He’d noticed the major’s furtive looks becoming more frequent since rejoining the Normandy and instead of the usual knee jerk reaction to roll his eyes when confronted with admiring glances...it felt good.

It makes him wonder, should the major ever become interested enough, how it would play out. Would Shepard accept the advance? Kaidan isn’t exactly the most forward, socially speaking. But the man is smart and kind, and a total badass. It gives Shepard ideas that keep him company at night.

After Boo does his nightly escape routine into the lower decks and he darkens the fish tank, of course. Too many googly eyes darting around while he got busy with his toys from the box under his bed. And wouldn’t the Alliance just be tickled pink with his growing collection on a warship?

“No problem, Kaidan.” The biotic doesn’t know subtlety, eyes catching on still healing scars from the Collectors.

And the tattoos.

Kaidan rubs his forehead with the back of his wrist. “Nice tatt. It’s new right?”

“Yeah.” Shepard glances down at the black points resting on his chest. Thank god his sister hasn’t seen it yet, he’d never hear the end of it. The matching anchors on their wrists were gotten after leaving the Reds during one of the darkest times of their lives, and they haven’t talked about them since.

Shepard turns around with a barely hidden smirk and bends over to grab his boots.

A quick breath, soft, but Shepard is listening for it because he worked hard for that ass, dammit. He’d been flatter than Thresher Maw territory. Finishing the laces on his boots, he turns back to his guest, grabbing the towel he’d dropped on his desk to finish drying his hair. He was going to have to buzz it tomorrow. “Did you need something?”

Kaidan’s eyes are quick to see the piles of data pads and the organized chaos the towel had been hiding.

Or, maybe not so organized looking as Shepard thought, gauging by the look on his friend’s face. “Something about Jane?” Jane, not Janey, not anymore. They’d been growing distant already by the time the Normandy was targeted by the Collectors. Time with Cerberus tore them apart until they weren’t just fighting, they were all but enemies.

John’s body had been more damaged than hers after Alchera and in the beginning Cerberus had basically held him hostage in a coma to get her to work with them. But the organization realized the efficiency of having two Shepards work for them and had sped up his recovery once Jane was loyal to the mission against the Collectors. Waking up from death had been a horrifying experience, second only to finding out they were now pawns for Cerberus.

Horizon was what finally drove it home for John. Ashley’s distrust when she ran into them on their first visit to the Citadel had been painful enough after all they’d been through, but Kaidan...Running into Kaidan on Horizon tore through every defense John thought he’d had as Garrus cringed and watched the normally pensive biotic get into a yelling match with Jane.

It’d been ugly. John had wanted to turn himself into the Alliance, he wasn’t the Spectre, but Jane argued that the Normandy would always be his. He’d gotten the compass rose tattooed over his heart that weekend after meeting with Wrex for drinks. A lot of drinks.

Kaidan’s mouth quirks in a grin. “I see all those reports are coming along with your usual efficiency?”

Letting out a dramatic groan, John gives up all pretense of showing off the body he’d built in confinement while Jane’d been off destroying galaxies and evading Alliance enquiries, and collapsed into his chair. “They put me in charge of saving the galaxy, not writing enough reports to build a fort for my damn hamster! N7 missions, reports for the council when I’m not even an instated Spectre! Diplomatic BS. We have to still pick up that religious artifact for the Volus.”

Smiling gently, Kaidan pokes at one tower to unearth a coffee cup. Possibly three. “You’ve done a great job that no one else can do. Can you imagine your sister running errands for the Volus?”

John laughs and sprawls loosely in his chair. “Only if it meant fleecing them for every credit. The Reds loved using her for collection duty. She always wanted to be a pirate when we were kids. Space, sea, didn’t matter. They gave her that outlet.”

“What did you want to be?”

Kaidan has stopped browsing the data pads to give him his full attention. Like always. Like John, not the Commander, was important. Only a few people have ever done that. It took others like Liara and Garrus years to see John. Tali and Joker may have called him on his bullshit from day one, but only Wrex and Kaidan saw through it. And Ashley had passively aggressively Yes Sir’d him until they came to an understanding over a bottle or two of Asari brandy.

John stared at the fish tank, watching the jellyfish bob by. He’s still not sure why he even has fish, but the tank had been a bright empty thing and his model ship collection completed. “When we were little, we grew up on space stations. We used to play all sorts of games. The air shafts and engineer vents were great for those things. She loved space. Me? Not so much.” He looks up at Kaidan. “I was always fascinated by earth and the different colonies planetside. The people, the culture, the land. I picked up every bit of information I could each port we visited, drove my parents nuts when I’d wander off exploring.”

“And?”

“It changed. When we lived in space I just wanted to explore the different worlds and the people on them. Get paid to do it. Mindoir? I resented being there, but it was great for a while. Blasto was just getting popular again and those movies may have been terrible, but other detective vids were getting popular with them. I liked the ‘whodunit’ mysteries and getting the bad guy, solving puzzles, saving the day.”

“You wanted to be one?”

As he looks up at the major, John realizes how wide he’s grinning. It’s a rare thing these days. “Yeah, pretty romantic of me, huh?”

Oh god, and there that little grin of Kaidan’s turns into a delicious smirk. “Pretty damned adorable, Shepard.”

“John.”

“John,” Kaidan parrots back at him and damn. Yeah, that was nice. “What about...after?”

“After?” John let loose a wry laugh. “After all that bellyaching about farmers and the hard work Aunt Aeryn put us through? I started missing it. We got to earth after everything and that loss? Aunt Pri and Aeryn and their kids? It just turned to anger. Got worse as they bounced us from home to home and mom was torn between the mission and her kids.”

“That’s when you joined the Reds?”

“Yeah, didn’t have much of a choice after we ran away. What about you, Kaidan? Ever thought you’d become the second human Spectre?”

“Nah.” There went Kaidan’s cheeks again. “An old war buddy of my dad’s gave me a doctor’s kit, used to love using it on my Bucky Bear.”

“Captain America, huh. Why am I not surprised. So you wanted to be a doctor?”

Kaidan nodded, probably not even aware that he was sorting the data pads into less precarious piles. “Obviously with BAaT that didn’t work out. But the Alliance gave me all the medical training I could ask for. Which has definitely come in handy since I met you two.”

John watches him putter about, smiling absently. “So what did my evil half want?”

“She said you’re ‘hoarding the good stuff again’ and that she needs it for a meeting.”

Frowning, John looks through the display holding his model ships at the varying collection of booze on the table by his couch. The bottles are arranged around his sister’s old N7 helmet from the Alchera ruins like a mockery of a shrine. Ryncol sits proudly on the low wall in dominance, too big to sit on the table and has all his best whiskey flanking it.

Drinking had started as a fun pastime with squadmates towards the end of the hunt for Saren. After forcibly being teamed up with Cerberus it had been a coping mechanism, much like the one he required when Jane lost all time for him in the Reds.

These bottles haven’t been touched in weeks.

“John?”

Looking back to Kaidan, he realizes why.

  
*~N7~*

Once again, John wishes for the gear they’d entered the Vault with. Despite the damage they’d been dealt with on the way in, a lot of their gear had still been intact. Unfortunately, the dwellers in the Vault had helped themselves before leaving.

Getting outside is tricky. The fallout caused by the Reapers and their tech exploding had decimated the city above further and collapsed the shaft with the elevator. The makeshift back door EDI gives him leads through a flooded sewer that makes his lungs burn for air, and only his N7 training gets him to the door with the waterlogged gear on his back.

How the dwellers left without drowning is a mystery.

Breaking the surface of thick, muddied water, he claws over to the riverbank while trying to get his breath back. The air isn’t the same anymore. It feels charged, making his skin and lungs tingle. As soon as he senses no threat, he takes in his surroundings.

“Fuck. Me.”

While he hadn’t time to memorize the town’s layout, it’s like he’s been transported to another planet. Most of the buildings are husks, the rest are either boarded up or haphazardly rebuilt with signs to warn the curious away. New grass dots everything between debris and trees try to grow through the blasted remains of their ancestors. The air feels healthy, despite the zing and he breathed deeply.

Not since Maine has he felt so lost without his sister, and he craves a drink like he hasn’t in months.

“Fuck.”

“This area of the wasteland is just beginning to feel the effects of Project Purity from what is now known as the Capital Wasteland in DC. A Vault dweller from 101 and a team of scientists managed to create a water purifier that is not only removing radiation from fresh and sea water, but encouraging vegetal growth and wildlife. It is estimated that within a few years, the entire eastern seaboard will have safe water.”

Shepard mulls that over. It looks like the world was already moving on and they hadn’t even needed him or Jane. He could’ve-

“Where am I headed, EDI?”

“Southwest. I recommend keeping the road in sight, but staying off of it. Raiders in the area like to lay traps for settlers and traders wandering by.”

Great. “Okie dokie, lead the way.” He fixes a grin on his face that has too much teeth and he dives into the undergrowth.

  
Playing with his Omni-Tool controls, he searches for and finds an active radio signal. Curious at what people are listening to now, he tunes in instead of playing one of his many playlists.

“~If You Cannot Find The Way,  
            Listen For My Song,  
                    I’ll Love You All Your Life,  
                          Although That May Not Be Too Long.~”

Then again.

Shepard turns to another station with a trembling hand, hoping for something less-

“~Well, I Roam From Town To Town,  
             I Go Through Life Without A Care,  
                     And I’m As Happy As A Clown,  
                             I With My Two Fists Of Iron But I’m Going Nowhere.~”

“Better,” Shepard murmured and set out.

Having mini EDI as a companion makes things a little more bearable, but unlike her original, she doesn’t understand human cues. Their relationship is spent with her teaching him wasteland knowledge and him teaching her the best times to keep her voice down.

“So, raiders I’m assuming?” A whole day later and it still feels like they’re on a different planet.

“That would be correct.”

Yeah. The settlement before him is made of half destroyed prefabs and walls of mesh and wooden planks, making it easy to see down inside. There isn’t anything resembling living quarters, just bare mattresses and chairs shoved under awnings. Bodies decorate the air on hooks, probably belonging to unwary travelers and traders. There’s a collection of belongings piled in a corner that must have belonged to the victims.

Clearly, raiders are assholes. The whole wasteland is a hell filled with assholes. He may be a little biased at the moment, seeing as a mole rat the size of a dog nearly bit his dick off while he’d been pissing on a shrub last night. Then all her sharp toothed friends decided to have a go, popping out of the ground like mutated daisies.

The cockroaches weren’t any smaller and seemed to have grown an appetite for human flesh. Honestly, he’d be safer squatting in the middle of a road to do his business than a building.

“I am picking up a signal that my mobile platform has left behind.”

“Oh?” Shepard counts ten assholes total, all human that he can see. It is going to be interesting with only a half loaded pistol and a shock baton, but he bet none of these junkies could even see straight. The armor they wear is amateurish, but better than the Vault Tec getup he has. He feels like a dork more than anything right now.

“It seems I left behind coordinates for a cache, possibly a dead drop.”

“Thank god for EDI.”

“Shepard, I must remind you-“

“I swear you lied about your personality matrix and have been trolling me this entire time.”

“That would be inaccurate, but something my mobile platform would have enjoyed doing.”

“Where is it, oh disembodied voice of EDI?”

A locator pops up in his eye piece and reveals the cache immediately to the east of the camp. It doesn’t look like he can get to it without alerting them unless he can get to the ‘roof’. Then again, he has a lot of anger he’s been trying to keep down, so he pops in his earbuds from his Omni-Tool and hits start on one of his many Fight Playlists.

Strolling in through the front, the raiders nearest the gate look up with a start, slightly lagged from whatever chemicals they’re steeping their brains in. Shepard smiles viciously, hand discreetly on his weapons. “Morning, guys.”

Instantly the raiders are on their feet, pulling out weapons in poor condition like a third rate gang and coming at him in full force.

“Perfect.” The fight is over in minutes, the smell of unwashed bodies on drugs the hardest part of it all, but it’s something he needs . At this point, it’s either fuel the rage or fall apart, and he can’t afford to do that.

Yet.

Going through the yard, he picks up things for himself and things he can sell to traders. Then he gets to the shed. Lock picking isn’t a skill he thought he’d ever revisit, but it’s like riding a bike and he gets the door open with only mild trouble.

“Don’t shoot!”

Eyebrows flying high, Shepard relaxes his stance and leans against the doorframe while hitting pause on his music. “I wasn’t planning on it.” Small pale hands covered in grime are raised from behind a workbench, and he is suddenly glad he’d killed the raiders first. “Come on out, I’m not going to hurt you.”

The smart thing would have been for her to have her own weapon trained on him, but she peeks from her hiding spot with wide eyes and he has to wonder who she is to survive with such naivety. Seeing that he’s true to his word, she stands up, skinny little thing that she is. Her coveralls and makeshift tool belt gives him an idea of what she does, her shock of rainbow hair in this bland wasteland fortifies his opinion of her youth.

“You got a name, kid?”

“You got one yourself?”

Smiling as friendly as he can, he offers, “John.”

“Ok, John. First things first, I’m not a kid. I bet you’re only a couple years older than me.”

“Doubtful, but go on.”

She narrows her eyes at him, arms crossed. “Hmph. You can call me Cat.”

“Cat.”

“S’what my friends call me. Only pa calls me Catalina. And anyone who took out those-“ she bristles and spits in the dirt. “Rad rats, is a friend of mine.”

“Got a personal vendetta, huh?” Shepard’s thoughts swing to the pile of discarded clothing and items he’d gone through earlier.

“Depends. Did you?”

“Not really. They just didn’t really like me, apparently.”

“Uh huh. Sure can handle yourself pretty well.”

Shepard smiles, knowing where this is going. “Sure can.”

“You with the Brotherhood?”

Or maybe not. “The who?”

“I believe she’s referring to the Brotherhood of Steel,” EDI’s voice chirps from his Omni-Tool and Cat stares in awe and inches closer. “It’s a quasi-religious technological organization that operates across the ruins of North America. It was founded by Captain Robert Maxson and their mission is to save humanity from themselves and technology.”

“Just humanity?”

“The current state of the Brotherhood is torn, but yes. Formerly, Maxson’s people were concerned for humanity and little else.”

“WOW, I’ve never seen a Pip-Boy like that before! Where did you get it?!” Cat has lost all her reserves and sidled close to start poking at the bright orange screens popping up from his forearm.

She quickly figures out how it works and starts eagerly tapping away. Smiling indulgently, he guides her away as she finds more serious controls. “That’s because it’s not a Pip-Boy. Pip-Boys were created by RobCo and Vault Tec after stealing designs from the Alliance. This is an Omni-Tool.”

“Hmm. That’s not a typical Vault suit neither. Where’re you from?”

“It’s more about where I’m going.” It’s starting to get dark out, so he heads toward the cache with her trailing behind closely. There’s a trap door in the floor and he reaches to open it-

“Oh wait!”

There’s a bark and then a beast lunges out at them. Cat’s urgent hand on his arm prevents him from pulling a weapon in time and it lands on the girl. Heart pounding and hands shaking, he soon realizes she’s laughing and the beast is merely licking her face.

It’s a dog. Of some kind. Ugly, probably from overexposure to what’s left of the fallout. The backpack and sweater it’s wearing demotes some of the scary factor.

“Sparky! That’s enough now, come on!”

“Why was he...?”

“I put her in there when the raiders came back early. I was worried she’d try going after ‘em, or bark out our location.”

“Just what are you doing here anyway?” Inside the cellar it’s a mess. Lazy raiders throwing in miscellaneous items. Thank god they weren’t lazy enough to use it as a toilet. He spots a duffle bag with N7 drawn on it and he quickly grabs it. As he does, he sees some dead radroaches, freshly killed. Leaving the cellar, he looks at the mutt who’s watching him, mangled tail waving and butt wiggling in excitement.

“Good dog.”

“Yeah, she is. Pa wasn’t sure about keeping her, but she’s really good at keeping the vermin away. Or dead. Now we don’t have hardly any problems farmin’.”

“You’re from a farm?”

She’s looking at him strangely, but it’s EDI who clarifies. “In order to survive the wasteland, every settler has to grow and hunt their own food. Only large towns with enough stores or frequent traders provide enough food to sell and buy.”

“Huh.” Looking in the bag he finds a shotgun and better armor. Beneath are a couple more items to help him on his journey. “What’s the possibility there’re more caches from the other you, EDI?”

“The probability is high. And it seems with each cache found is another update for my data. For instance, I can inform you of the exact location of The Hub, since my mobile platform visited it. I predict it will still be quite the distance to travel.”

“Just how long are we talking, EDI?”

“Five days and nine hours at the speed you’ve been traveling.”

“What do you want to go there for? Pa said there’s more than plenty of nasty things between here and there.” Pure curiosity paint’s Cat’s face.

Shepard looks at the girl. “A friend of mine is turian. A xeno who can only eat dextro. I need to travel to The Hub for some information so I can save his ugly ass. Again.”

“Ahh. You need a ride?” The glint in her eye is similar to the one Liara had as the Shadow Broker and makes him a touch nervous.

“Depends. What do you want in return?” he asked cautiously.

An hour later they find themselves outside an even bigger raider encampment, which has actual houses and machine turrets inside the gates. It’s full dark out, but John thinks it’ll be easier for him to see than the junkies. Already he can see them jumping at shadows and turning in for sleep.

So far, there are still no signs of asari or krogan, anything xeno, despite his knowledge of how many foot soldiers earth had when the Reapers showed up. While he’s relieved he won’t have to fight a stronger enemy, he’s worried about their survival. Even as he thinks it, a wave of exhaustion overcomes the thoughts. Caring about others had fueled him and the Normandy missions, but at the end, only his closest friends had kept him on his feet and moving forward.

He’d never been suicidal despite popular opinion, but he had been ready to finish. Whether it meant dying in a blaze of glory, or retiring in some way. Not that Kai-

“So, these assholes have been raiding all the local farms and settlements.”

“Yeah,” Cat’s face is grim and pale, the scarf Shepard convinced her to cover her hair with falling low over her eyes. “Ma had a food cellar in the barn. My sister hid us in there, helped keep me and Sparky quiet when they came. They killed everyone, took everything they wanted, set fire to the house. It made Ma’s chem station explode. She used to use it for the crops, she and my sister was always smart with stuff like that.”

“What about you?”

Cat grinned at him. “Pa taught me mechanics, engineering. I’ve been fixing up this bike I found, it’s yours if you can clear em out. I don’t know if they have Ma’s crop chems, but if they do, it’ll be a big help for my sister and me.”

“She know you’re out here, doing this?” One by one he marks everyone he can see, moving slowly and guiding the girl with him as he does so.

Grunting, Cat picks at the bush they stop near. “Huh, silt beans. Pa always swore by it for stews.”

“Cat?”

“Nah. I mean, if I’m not back by mornin’ she’ll know. We had a fight about it. I know she means well, but her and I got different opinions ‘bout stuff and Ma’s not around anymore to sit us in our corners.”

“Big sisters are like that. More so, now that it’s just the two of you.”

“You got one?”

Shepard is quiet a minute before answering. “I hope so. We were separated and there’s a chance she’s out there, kicking ass and taking names.”

“Older or younger?”

“Older by nineteen minutes. Which she’s never let me live down.”

“Twins?! That’s something else. But you still know how annoying they are.”

Shepard turns to her when they’re in a good spot, crouching down and encouraging her to do the same. “I can’t speak for your sister, but let me say something mine told me. We went through some hard times together, got separated sometimes because of it. People used to try using me as leverage against her, exploit the very thing that irritates you about yours. That self entitled ‘I know better’ and ‘I’m the older sibling’ BS.”

“And? What, it worked?”

“The opposite. People tried to say I was weak, her weakness. But when they tried to use me, it did the opposite. She remembered what was important. She said I was what made her strong, because I mattered and everything else was weak.”

Seeing her mull over that, he looks around to make sure it’s safe and even offers a pat to the leashed Sparky. “Stay here. This shouldn’t take too long. If they come after you, set Sparky free and run back to where we met, but in the tree line, ok?”

She nods, still distracted by her thoughts, but brings up the pistol in her hands. “Gravy.”

The area is better lit than he would have liked, but he sneaks up behind the stragglers and dispatches them with ease near the tree line before entering over the wall. He manages five more stealth kills before anyone notices something is going on and then it’s chaos. The first radio he sees is old, even from before the Reapers blew. Turning it on is impulsive more than strategic, but when the raiders start flipping out over the random noise, he turns on every single one he can find as he goes through the camp.

The chaos is easy enough for him to manage, no worse than a night at the Armax Arena with Garrus, the radios replacing his usual music. The only person that gives him trouble is the leader, who either still has brain enough left to use, or just the right cocktail to make them stronger.

Clearing the camp takes longer than the last, but he finds more supplies.

And cages. With people in them. One is watching him warily, the young man’s eyes bright in the darkness. Shepard holsters his shotgun and raises his hands as he nears them.

“Hi there.”

“Who are you?” The words are free of slurring, the man’s gaze steady. Not a raider.

“Oh, you know, just strolling through. Doing a favor for a friend. You traders?”

The man is still wary, but shoots the next cage over a concerned glance. “Settlers. The raiders caught us unaware. Please, can you just, check on her? I haven’t, she-“

Shepard immediately puts his old lockpicking skills to use, eyes sharp on the woman in the other cage. Her breath is even, but there’s fresh blood on her and as he looks her over, he can spot sporadic knife wounds. Administering first aid, he stares at her hair as she tries to open her eyes.

The hair is dyed a light color except for the roots, which are bright rainbow colors. Originally he’d thought Cat’s hair was dyed, but it seems someone in her family from before the war had gene mods done to their hair, making them permanently genetic in her family. A trend that was more popular in space ports than earth, so, not a coincidence. “Shit.”

“She ok?”

“She’s going to be fine, I have some stimpaks. You a friend of hers?”

The man nods. “Neighbors. Name’s Harlan.” He threads a dark hand through the bars for a shake, which Shepard gives. “The raiders took something from her homestead that could help a lot of people.”

“You know her sister?”

Harlan’s eyes narrow. “How do you know her?”

Hmm. Crush then? “We met a couple hours ago when she snuck into another raider camp.”

“Where is she? Is she ok?!”

“Catalina? Cat’s here?” The young woman is moving, testing out her limbs and wounds, but the stimpaks have done their job and they’re healed.

“She’s fine, the dog’s fine. She hired me to clear out the camp so she could get back your mother’s things.

“Hired you?! With WHAT?” The woman’s eyes are narrowing in a way that is very familiar to Shepard as a younger brother.

Damn, he hopes he can still get that bike.

 

 

 


	4. Rocket 69

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s entirely possible Shepard gets called out on his taste in love interests, but he also receives news in his travels that he’s been dreading and hoping for in equal measure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I can’t take full credit for the chapstick scene. Estal once shared this hilarious story with us and I asked if I could add it to my FE fic.
> 
> Also, Chris/Piers cameo just for Jeanne. Everything else was self-indulgence.

It’s a rare moment, the Normandy so quiet. Maybe it’s not even the ship and he’s just projecting because it’s the first time in weeks he doesn’t have five things going on at once and all there is to do is wait for their arrival at the next mission. Shepard’s sitting at the table in the ship’s commissary and soaking in every memory as he stares blankly at the data stream hanging on the information board overhead.

“So, you’re an ass man.”

His coffee mug skitters across the table top as Tali’s voice breaks the stillness and it’s only because it’s a quarter full that it doesn’t spill everywhere.

“That is the Earth term you use, right?”

Shepard stared at her a bit incredulously as she sits next to him, busy Omni-Tool out and a snack in her free hand. “I’m a what now?” It was always good to clarify with the non-humans on slang. He’s had some very interesting misunderstandings with Grunt that could only be re-told over an emptied bottle of Ryncol.

“You’re an ass man. Humans are especially attracted to ‘butts and boobs’? Or so Jane tells me.” She tilts her head at him and this close he can make out the shine of her pale eyes through the purple faceplate, the curve of her nose and brow. He can’t see the smirk, but he knows it’s there.

Laughing, he pulls his coffee close again. “And what makes you draw that conclusion?”

“Observation. You’re not subtle, John. You were very diplomatic to never take sides, but you tended to be distracted when Miranda entered a room. Or more accurately, exited a room.”

Tali’s humor is contagious and he relaxes back in the chair. “You may have a point th-“

“Not to mention myself. I was very hopeful you’d act on that little crush I used to have on you with all the attention you gave certain... ass-pects of me.”

God, he’d missed her. “Tali. Are you saying you don’t have a crush on me anymore? You’re breaking my heart here.”

“Maybe not your heart.” There is a definite trill to her voice now. “Besides, I believe we have all been replaced. Not to mention Garrus has finally stopped overcompensating with his ‘calibrations’ and gotten his head out of his carapace. Sadly, it was just not meant to be between us.” She leans close and pushes the dextro snack close, revealing its actually a levo protein bar from med bay. “But imagine how good we would have been, eh Shepard?”

Sighing, he accepts the high caloric bar from her, probably via Chakwas, and reluctantly starts gnawing on it. “The whole galaxy would have been jealous. I wouldn’t have deserved you.”

“Neither does Kaidan.”

Choking on the dry chunks in his mouth, he stares at her.

“Lovely, John. No wonder you draw such a crowd in every port.”

Hastily gulping the room temp coffee, he gets the worst of it down.“I thought it was my charming personality. What was-“

“It’s definitely your personality. Perhaps tone it down some the next time we meet with the local mafia.”

“Yeah, ok, but what-“

“Oh, Kaidan! Hi.”

Shepard turns to see Kaidan arriving at the table with his post-workout meal and fancy tea, hair still damp from the shower and slightly messy. All aboard had been glad when it was revealed the Alliance had made changing out the Cerberus water showers for practical sonic showers a last priority. He was especially glad for his private shower and mostly intact quarters.

“Hey, John, Tali. How’s the Nexus working out for you?”

“Still better than the Logic Arrest.”

Kaidan raises an eyebrow and pokes a fork in the direction of her Omni-Tool. “It works just fine for me, but did you hear about the new Adapytics they’re coming out with?”

“The factory halted all production when the Council mobilized for the invasion.”

The major swallows a bite of...beef?...and taps a link on his Omni-Tool to share it with her. Damn, the biotics and their metabolism! They get all the best meals. “A subdivision is still pushing to get them out, especially for the higher ranked officials. The latest info says it’s resistant to Reaper tech.”

“You’re so gullible, Kaidan. There’s no way they have something that guarantees protection against their-“

“Aht!” Kaidan’s smirking at her. “You would be right, except I know for a fact that a certain Spectre got the Reaper tech blueprints and anti-spyware with the help of her brother.”

“Reaaaally?” Tali looks dubiously at Shepard, who nods at her distractedly. “Huh. Well, then. I’ll reserve judgement until I can get my hands on it.”

“And just how are you going to get your hands on one of those?” Shepard wonders, because Omni-Tools had been produced for Alliance personnel and marines, but had managed to trickle their way into open markets. The knock offs had been made for the public by RobCo and distributed by Vault-Tec. It’s hard to get the real thing without connections, and to get her hands on a limited release?

“Don’t be dense. I have two Shepards who owe me favors.”

“Good to know our relationship is so well founded, Tali. You really know how to sweet talk a guy.”

“Mm. I’m not the one who needs to work on their sweet talking.” The quarian’s head tilt is considering.

Kaidan hunches over his asari tea, a gift from Samara that’s a strange purple color with a spicy scent and made specially for biotics. The second he mentioned that it had helped stave off a migraine, Shepard had a crate ordered and waiting for their next visit to the Citadel. “Oh? And just who does our illustrious commander need practice for?”

Snorting, Tali stands up. “Dense is not a good look on either of you. Shepard, Chakwas says if you don’t get your body weight up by next week she will resort to extreme measures. Honestly, she can be scary when she wants to be.”

They are both looking at him with scrutiny and Shepard squirms as he feels his ears burn a bit. He isn’t starving himself. Getting a head start and preparing for the Reaper arrival didn’t help him sleep any better at night, or make his appetite any heartier. The synthetic machines are due in a short time and only half the galaxy believes them because he and Jane had managed to find enough evidence to make believers of the council.

Extreme measures usually means calling in his twin, though, who loves playing the overbearing older sister. Older by only nineteen minutes, not that she cares.

Kaidan has an all-knowing look in his eyes that warms Shepard. “I don’t know, Tali. I don’t blame him for not being hungry for the last batch of MREs.”

“Says the man eating curry surprise,” Shepard banters back.

“It’s actually really good.”

“I wouldn’t know.”

Kaidan immediately raises a fork loaded with beef and rice towards Shepard, who eagerly helps himself and sits back down smugly. “Damn. All the enhancements, and Cerberus couldn’t make me a biotic.”

“You could just order extra for the rest of the crew.”

“I wouldn’t want to abuse my power.”

“I wouldn’t want to intrude anymore, so I’ll be going.” The slight head tilt Tali gives before leaving is her way of letting them know she’s rolling her eyes.

“What’s she on about now?” Kaidan is happily polishing off his veggies and wiping his mouth clean.

“Who knows.” He has an idea. “Maybe Garrus isn’t putting out.”

That garners a laugh. “Garrus isn’t that stupid. I thought the crush he had on your sister was bad, I think he’d actually leave that damn cannon if Tali made him choose.”

“Ew, no. Let’s not talk about my worse half that way, ok? She tortures me enough with the sexcapades she’s always bragging about.”

“So? Torture her back.” Kaidan’s organizing his empty tray and pulling out a tube of lip balm. The Normandy has been dry since her last port and Shepard makes a mental note to either fix the issue or start ordering lotion based soap for the crew.

“With what?”

“Your own sex stories.” Their eyes meet as Kaidan starts applying the lip balm, the motion slowing and halting as the words echo between them. It should be comical, the way Kaidan freezes, but Shepard’s eyes are drawn to the way the light catches on the sheen and shape of his mouth. The thin scar that bisects his full lips, pointing to another beneath. The eternal stubble lining his jaw and the tiny cleft in his chin.

  
The small stick continues its journey and suddenly, he feels hot despite being under an air vent. The tempting lips tuck in and rub together, spreading the coat evenly and the need to ‘work on reports’ in his cabin is a very real, very sudden thing.

Shepard drags his gaze back to Kaidan’s eyes and feels his breath catch at the intensity that meets him there. Clearing his throat, he fiddles with his empty coffee cup and waffles about getting up to brew more. “Too bad I don’t have any new ones to tell.”

“No?” Kaidan’s watching him closely, lips still rubbing together absently, distractingly.

Shepard tries to focus on his eyes, but they’re strangely piercing. “No.” He clears his throat again. “Not for a long time.”

A small grin tugs at that mouth. “Hmm. Hey, you know what? After this mission we should head back to the Citadel.”

“Spectre mission?”

“If that’s what it takes to get you some shore leave, sure. But I really think we could all use some R and R. Maybe a nice little sanity check. No telling when the real fight will start.”

“Yeah, ok. Sure.” Shepard gets that coffee to excuse himself and beats a hasty retreat.  
  
The next night and another mission down, Shepard posts a mandatory shore leave from his private terminal, body draping over his desk and half asleep as Boo nests in the hood of his sweatshirt. Not ten minutes later, he gets a reply from Kaidan asking to meet at Apollo’s. He stares at it as his space hamster burrows for the right spot, feeling a strange hesitation he didn’t with with everyone else’s request for a meet-up.

A new message pings, quickly followed by more. Junk mail and requests from people he’s never heard of...

And one from his sister.

Sighing, he deletes the junk, saves the requests for later and types a quick reply to Kaidan so he can save all his energy for his sister’s message. God knows it’ll probably be a doozy.

Or random photos from her Spectre adventures. Like the one of a pyjak that had stolen a krogan’s shotgun and chased them with it.

*~N7~*

The four of them head back to the farm laden with the missing equipment and other things scavenged from the raiders. Harlan keeps a sharp eye on him even as Shepard helps them bury the bodies of the girls’ parents and farmhands until Rosalyn, Cat’s sister, ushers him home. They offer Shepard a niche in the barn for the night with a small cot, and he helps Cat with damage control on the homestead until Rosalyn finishes making them a late night dinner.

Right up until dessert the girls have a stiff upper lip. It’s the pie their mother had planned on saving for tomorrow and the beginning of harvest, made with a new breed of berries called mutfruit. Tart and sweet, it reminds Shepard of raspberries and blueberries, but dense like an apple and he savors the bites he takes while trying to not panic over the sniffling women at the table.

Honestly, he’s never been much of a sympathetic crier (thank god Jane wasn’t here to refute that) but their tragedy so close to his-

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay awhile longer?” The longer he lingers in any place, the louder the ticking clock at the back of his head gets, but he can’t ignore people in need.  
  
Cat angrily wipes at her face and gives a wobbly smile, but Rosalyn answers. “We’ll be fine, John. Thank you. Harlan is going to round up the gang and meet us tomorrow afternoon.” The steady look in her eyes cinches it and he reluctantly finishes the last bite of pie.

Later he falls asleep to the sound of night insects and the lowing of a Brahmin named Clover that had escaped the raid. The animal is some sort of mutated cow with two heads and very little fur, but tends to act more like a dog than any cow Shepard had encountered on Earth or Mindoir. She’s strangely...cute. Ugly, but cute.

Waking up in the barn the next morning to the excited moo of the Brahmin getting food is harder than the other times he’s woken in the Wasteland. It reminds him of sneaking around with his first girlfriend and trying not to get caught by her daddy, itchy hay in terrible places and the smell of animals heavy in the air. Getting hosed down with freezing water when Aunt Pri finds them instead, Jane snickering and hiding-

“Hey EDI, why didn’t the alarm go off?”

“Being cryogenically frozen for two hundred and fifteen years is not a form of rest, it is a state of suspended animation. The way you’ve been pushing yourself is straining you-“

“EDI, I have to trust you.”

A beat of silence. “My apologies. I am not as adept at understanding as my mobile platform and the AI Core on the Normandy. I will not take such assumptions again.”

Shepard closes his eyes and sighs. “Thank you.”

The overturned tub the girls gave him for a quick wash before bed is dry, so he rights it and gathers his things. It didn’t beat a water or even a sonic shower, but at least the worst of the grime is off and he heads out to find the sisters. They ask him to deliver a message to Cat’s best friend who’s been running errands for The Hub and give him a small sack of tatos for the trouble.

God, but John loves tatos. Some sort of weird tomato and potato hybrid that tastes like sweet and sour styrofoam uncooked, but roast them over a fire and it’s like being back in Aunt Aeryn’s kitchen on the farm. Cat gives him some of her Pa’s recipes and the blade he used to shave with. Rosalyn tries giving him a bottle of vodka her ma was saving for stew, and he’s tempted. So tempted.

She sees his internal struggle and when he hands the bottle back, there’s more respect in her eyes than when he’d helped them home with their equipment. It’s not something he is looking for, but it fills him with a pride he doesn’t know he needs.

The motorcycle may have rust at its edges, but it’s functioning and belongs to Shepard now. Nothing like the machine he’d ridden in the Reds or the classic Harley he stole off an Admiral for an N7 assignment, but it’s beautiful. A bright red Ducati with gleaming metal and its a Fusion, which means it runs on a self-sustaining battery and no fuel. It’s a Lone Wanderer, the last series made before the Reapers came, stylized after more classic models.

When the engine purrs to life, music spills from it’s speakers, the radio left on by it’s previous owner.

“~You’ll Love The New World I’m Going To Take You In,  
           Rocket 69, Rocket 69,  
                     We’ll Take Off From A Star And The Moon Is Not Too Far.~”

Morning is breaking through the trees on the highway, the bright yellow and pink beanie he’d swiped from the raider camp is pulled low over his brow against the wind. Cat didn’t have a helmet to give him, but he at least has the road goggles from Harlan to protect his eyes from the wind. He tries riding through the night and hopes leaving the larger city areas mean less people and beasts, but it only means different kinds.

He has to stop a few times when he can’t avoid other mutated creatures, the huge bear the worst of them. EDI calls it a Yao Guai, its eyes practically glowing and its swipe as deadly as a krogan’s charge.

And then there’s the traders ambushed by extorting raiders.

And the dog.

Shepard is fighting a pack of Sparky’s ugly cousins that doesn’t have an ounce of her friendliness when EDI helpfully informs him that a dog has come to his aid and taken out the mongrel sneaking up the hillside near him. Just when he thinks they’ve finished the fight, those god damned mole rats start popping out of the damn ground.

The snarl he unleashes is probably the most undignified he’s felt in a long time, but he is going to kill every last one he sees if it kills him. The yelping of the dog makes him end the fight sooner than he intends and he turns to get his first real glance.

It’s some sort of fluffy breed, maybe some kind of husky or german shepherd. Hell, it could be part poodle and he wouldn’t know. He wasn’t the dog lover, Kai-

“Hey, buddy.” Shepard keeps his voice soft and his body level with the dog, hard to do when you’re far over six feet tall and packed with muscle, but the dog isn’t intimidated. Its ears perk up and eagerly rises to meet him, back leg dragging behind. “Hey.” The dog sniffs at his proffered hand and noses under it for pets, despite a tiny whine of pain.

Dammit. The second he thinks the dog won’t mind, he injects a stimpak near it’s leg and sneaks an awkward peek.

“Aw, hey there, girl. Where’s your owner, huh?” The dog must have familiarity with the medicine because she doesn’t whine at the prick and is immediately jumping on him to lick her thanks. Shepard falls back on his ass, laughing and trying to fend her enthusiasm off. “Ok, ok, you’re welcome!”

“There appears to be a collar, but no location stated and no chip present. The engraving seems to read Squirrel.” He’s glad EDI confirmed it, the name is too roughly carved into the metal and a mess.

“I doubt people are able to chip their animals in this day and age, EDI, but thanks for checking. All right, how about we get you home real quick, huh? EDI, where’s the nearest-“

A marker pops up in his eye piece. “Ok, come on, Squirrel.”

The dog wiggles in place at his attention, but doesn’t seem eager to go anywhere.

“Squirrel?”

That gets a head tilt and a paw patting at his leg for attention, but Shepard has to wonder at the legitimacy of the name. He tries whistling and making kissy noises and while he feels stupid doing it, the dog hops to and is immediately dancing around him.

“Ok, that’ll work.”

The motorcycle is where he left it and he looks at it a moment, not wanting to abandon his only ride even for a moment. “Ok, lets see if we can-“ The second he has a leg over the machine, Squirrel is wiggling near his leg and panting happily. When he leans back to fix his saddle bag, she jumps right into his lap and somehow manages to twirl in a circle-

“Holy mother of krogan! OW. Fuuuuuuuck.”

-before planting her ass down like she thinks this will work and she’s half the size she is. Frowning at her, he realizes he can reach the handlebars just fine if he doesn’t mind cuddling close. Dog breath aside, it’s nice. Maybe he’s feeling touch starved but-

“Ok. Just, keep your pointy bits away from my squishie bits and hopefully everyone will be happy.” She looks back at him and from this angle it looks judgy. “Dammit, I need to be near more people.”

The motorcycle gets them to the town quickly and because he’s going slow, he’s able to brake safely when Squirrel stands and promptly jumps off. Following her, he keeps an eye on the area, but it’s a small town and the few homes are scattered far apart. There doesn’t seem to be any movement and EDI hasn’t alerted him to any enemies.

The home they come to is an old ranch style, long with a garage and has been patched up since the war ended. The bike he tucks away close to the building where he can quickly pull out, but it’s not readily seen and he pokes around for Squirrel. Entering the kitchen, he gags at the smell of spoiled food and swats at the bugs that have gathered near it.

“Ok, that’s not a good sign.” The rest of the home reveals that more than one person lives there, but hasn’t been back in a while. Heart sinking, Shepard spies a hastily written note stuck to the inside of a bedroom door as Squirrel trots around, sniffing here and there, whining occasionally.

“‘Earle, Took the shotgun...don’t be mad...can’t let him keep...fed the animals, be home soon.’ Oh, no.” Squirrel is laying across a cushion, nose resting on her paws and looking up at him. “Oh girl, I’m so sorry. Are you hungry? Where’s your friend?”

Fuck. He braves the kitchen again and finds the empty dog bowl. There are cans of dog food that are miraculously unexpired, so he cracks one open and plops it in the bowl. Squirrel is instantly there and scarfing it down. Before he can start thinking horrible thoughts about the other animal, there’s a skittering and suddenly there are two small blurs flying into the kitchen from a dog door. They come shoulder to shoulder with Squirrel and begin happily noshing away.

“Fuck.” One’s a cat, which probably explains why it kept its distance until there was food. The other is a smaller dog that looks like it found a mud puddle to be happy in. Sighing, he starts packing away the dog food and a smaller bowl before he can think about it. “Ok, then. Let’s figure this out.” Someone at The Hub has to have a place for animals, right?

The garage is a mess of parts, but a nearby farm has a sidecar he can attach with those parts and also some ugly looking chickens. The sun is beginning its descent by the time he’s done with his bike modifications and he cooks the chickens while trying not to feel sad about ruining the clean lines of the machine.

The dogs and cat get along well and they all have a small feast. The smaller dog gets a quick wash and reveals his collar to say Cooper. The cat has only one eye and no collar, so Shepard decides to call him One Eyed Pete after his sister’s favorite stuffed parrot as a kid.

They all settle in at the old farm. There are some dog supplies there as well and Shepard finds a goldmine. There’s a small bookcase of old paper books with mysteries and old detective stories. Mostly fiction, but there’s also “Nick Valentine?!”

Squirrel sits up and barks at him.

Pausing in his excitement over finding a mini-shrine to one of his favorite real life detectives, he quirked an eyebrow at the dog. “Nick?”

The dog twirls and barks excitedly.

“Ok, let’s go with that then. Nicky it is.” Sighing, he looks over the old books about Valentine in his heyday and scans them and some others for reading later on his Omni-Tool. He’d once had an opportunity to meet the legend and the guy was a bit of an ass, probably why people tell you to never meet your heroes, but Shepard had still learned a lot from him.

They all fall asleep in a jumbled pile in a spare room and Shepard is reluctant to admit to how nice it is, despite the smell of wet dog and all their combined breath. Cooper and the cat seem thick as thieves. The Siamese cat is snuggled into the downy black of the smaller dog’s belly. Nicky must have been a recent edition.

The next day he loads up the Fusion motorcycle and manages to get the animals in the sidecar with little to no fuss. Well, the cat keeps jumping out and swiping at him and he’s tempted for half a second to leave the animal, but Cooper just curls up in the car and the cat eventually settles in. Thank god.

He starts riding at a slower pace, worried, but the animals are fine and he finds a good speed and enjoys the view. The roads are framed by better and thicker vegetation and there’s still early morning mist creeping up and catching the rising sunlight. Ruined cars and transports dot the road, but it’s easy for him to weave around the wreckage.

Two hours out, they come across the site of a crashed domestic airline. It spans across the entire road and he’s sickened at the sight of skeletons and hastily packed bags strewn everywhere. Nicky and Cooper perk up when he unconsciously slows, so he carefully rides through the mess and resumes.

The hoof beats register just as EDI alerts him on the eyepiece of approaching life forms. There are two normal looking horses with riders, a woman and a man flanking him from the roadside. Feeling protective of his new buddies, he’s wary of slowing down, but does.

The horses seem to be in good condition, the armor maintained and clean. Both have weapons, but only the woman is keeping her hand on one. They slow down with him, but keep their distance.

“STAY.” Nicky scooches down from where she started standing on the edge of the car and Cooper projects innocence, but Pete just looks indignant.

“Hello there!” Shepard calls.

The woman nods and seems to be in charge. “Morning. Where are you riding from?”

Hmm. “East, from outside of DC.”

Her eyes linger on the animals, warm and it eases some tension inside of him, despite how sharp they are when they’re looking back at him. “And where are you headed?”

“Place called The Hub?”

“New around here, huh?”

“Yeah. I’m looking for supplies and information. I’m told it’s the best bet.”

The woman dismounts and the closer she gets, the more weapons he can see. Most prominently is a pair of hand cannons. She’s the kind of woman who is equal parts beautiful and terrifying. When she holds out her hand for a shake, her grip is far more powerful than her slim figure suggests. “Alice Abernathy. My shadow over there is Carlos Olivera. We’re runners for The Hub. Keep the roads clear so the others can travel and work on the lines safely.”

“John. You said lines?”

“It appears The Hub is not only renowned for its trading and information source, they’re working to get long distance communication up and running.”

“Thanks, EDI.”

Alice’s gaze is quick on the Omni-Tool when it flickers to life with the AI’s voice and penetrating when it meets his again. “Haven’t seen one of those in a while.”

“They were originally intended only for military and the higher ups before the war. You’ve seen one before? At The Hub?”

She shakes her head. “No. Another place we make regular runs to. What’s your full name?”

It’s harder to spit out than he wants to admit. He’s tried so hard not to think about certain things and the last thing he wants to say is “Shepard. John Shepard.”

A slow smile lights up her face and it makes her look younger. “John Shepard, hmm?”

Wary, he smiles back, but keeps it friendly.

“Carlos and I are clearing out a nearby mine of ghouls and then we can take you the rest of the way. Sound good?”

“What are-“

EDI interrupts helpfully. “Ghouls are humans with overexposure to the fallout, usually feral with rotting-“

“Zombies?! There are ZOMBIES?” Shepard stares at Alice in horrified wonder.

They fill him in about the ghouls, explain some are still sane but keep to themselves to avoid trouble and discrimination. Carlos nearly pouts at being left behind with the animals so Alice can give Shepard a proper introduction to ghoul fighting, but she winks at him and he rolls his eyes and all is fine.

The ghouls don’t smell as foul as he expects, but are as ugly as he imagined. The creepiest part is the weird noise they make as they slither from hidden crevices and sneak up on them in the mine. The lanky frames covered in tattered clothing are insanely fast for what looks like a corpse and he’s embarrassed to admit to almost yelping the first time one runs at him.

  
The fact that they are in a confined space heavy with dust and deep shadows from their lights adds a horror movie aesthetic that makes Shepard nearly cackle with glee.

Working with Alice is easy and they find a rhythm as they get deeper and deeper in. “You’re good at this, been in many fights?”

Shepard grins as he smacks a ghoul in the face with the butt of his rifle and then shoots it’s friend in the face. “Only since I was a kid. My sister loved starting them.”

Alice gives a rusty laugh and manages to take down two ghouls with a single blast from her hand cannon. “And you loved finishing them, huh?”

“Sounds like you speak from experience.”

She gives a sly “Maybe.”

The last one they encounter is bloated and glowing with a teal residue that EDI reports is mostly nuclear, but also comprised of a mineral exclusive to Reaper Tech. The bastard goes down hard, but they’re both grinning when the task is done.

Leaving the mine, EDI warns him there are more people waiting outside and he fights not to tense up at the possible trap laying in wait. There are three motorcycles now lined up near his and two of the riders are playing with the animals while the third, a tall, thin man, leans easily against a tree and chats with Carlos.

Carlos gives them a nod and gestures to the man, who turns and sizes him up. “This is Dee. He’s the guy in charge of working the lines. He and his boys are working on a tower nearby.”

EDI confirms there are no other body signatures so he shakes the man’s hand and offers a smile. “John. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

The guy continues to size him up silently and Shepard feels amused.

“His old lady runs The Hub. Everybody just calls her The Boss, though. She can probably tell you what you need to know. That woman knows everything.”

“Hmm. We’ll see.” Dee nods at him and then barks orders at the boys to get going.

Shepard checks on the pets and then follows Alice and Carlos’ horses on the bike. He’s not sure what he’s expecting of The Hub, almost expects it to be a converted warehouse like some of the places he’s passed, or perhaps not even a fixed point but a group of people.

It’s actually a flourishing town set up around a flowing river, with buildings raised high over waterfalls and others nestled along the banks. It’s the largest settlement he’s seen so far and there are walls with guard towers and markets for traders and even a place to park the bikes and hitch the horses.

Cooper and Pete are scooped up by Dee’s boys, but Nicky trots by Shepard’s side as Alice leads him past a hotel and what looks like an old fashioned post office. A quick question and then he darts inside to deliver Cat’s message before returning to her side. Dee and Carlos follow behind, the darker man with an easy going countenance and Dee with the same forced aloofness.

Instead of one of the official looking buildings, he’s led to a residence. Stepping inside is like entering home, warm and filled with comforting smells and noises. Two kids run past in the hall and Dee absently places a handy lampshade on the last one’s head as he goes by. More bikers are shit talking in the kitchen with a woman dressed like the runners, all of them holding plates filled with food and two of the men with their heads bowed close together.

Alice deviates to them and kisses the woman on the cheek and gets an answering smack on the ass. “This is Claire Redfield and her brother Chris, his boyfriend Piers. This is Parker and Eliot Spencer. Guys, this is John Shepard.”

The sudden silence amplifies their gazes as they stare at him and as he curses his name, maybe he should have just started over with a new one, Alice asks the all important “Where’s The Boss?”

Claire’s eyes are a touch somber when she answers her, head tilted toward Eliot and Parker. “In the back with Alec. Geek squad just got back with info from the tower near Peaches.”

Alice thanks her and continues on through the kitchen after stealing a beer, past a living room filled with more people and outside to a small cabin. Inside is filled with equipment, everything from long range scanners to weather radar and a fancy looking coffee maker.

What Shepard would do for coffee.

“Alice! Thank god you’re back safe. Everything go ok?” The short woman speaking is smiling warmly at them both, hand on the shoulder of the man to politely interrupt him from their conversation.

“Yes ma’am! Ghouls are cleared out. And our new friend helped me out. I have to warn you, though, I think your kids decided to adopt his pets.”

The woman frowns. “Your-“

“Uh, not mine, ma’am. I just found them as I was traveling here. Pretty sure the original owners are dead. Didn’t have the heart to leave them.”

“Oh, aren’t you sweet? But damn. Dee! You go tell them we don’t need MORE animals running around. See if Jack can take them on.” The tall man nods and leaves without a word. “Now, what can I do for you?”

“Well, my friend is a turian and can’t survive without dextro based food. He’s been in cryogenic stasis, but the equipment is old and beginning to fail. I either need supplies to fix it or a source of food for when he wakes.”

The Boss’s eyes widen. “A turian?”

Alice leans over. “His name is John Shepard and he has an Omni-Tool like the ones from Meridian.”

“Oooohhhh, dear.” The older woman places a hand on her chest. “Oh boy. Ok, Alec, can you please come back later? Just give Parker the address and let her sort it out.”

The man leaves and everyone else trickles out after him, Alice last after giving his shoulder a comforting squeeze.

“That. Ok. How do you know my name?”

The Boss sighs and sits down at a table with a re-configured computer on it. “This probably will require the hard stuff. You want anything, honey? I can have one of the boys run next door to the parlor for some whiskey or even stuff to make a cocktail.”

Shepard sits across from her warily and shakes his head.

“Ok. So, we’ve been trying to get communication up all across the wasteland. About a year ago, we helped repair a tower in the Capital Wasteland and got all kinds of data. Mostly useless, some of it just looped distress calls. Heartbreaking, but, what can you do? Then we came across one message, probably the very last one sent before the Reapers blew. I believe it was meant for you.”

Nicky has been leaning against his knee since he sat down and now he clutches at her fur as much as he can without hurting her. “And?”

Tapping at the keyboard, she pulls up a window on the screen and moves out of the way for him to see.

It’s Anderson, just as Shepard last saw him.

“This message is for Commander John Shepard of the Alliance Normandy SR-2.” But he looks more exhausted than Shepard remembers. “Son. I am so sorry. Call me selfish, but you and Jane are the closest things I’ve ever had to children. Unprofessional maybe, but I don’t give a damn. Since the day you handed Captain Van Dien his own ass, I knew you would do more great things. Hell, just having McGraw put your names forward should have been enough of a warning.”

Anderson sighs and smiles a little. “Not even I could predict what you two would accomplish. I don’t want to imagine what might have happened if you hadn’t found out about the Reaper invasion, or work miracles to pull the council’s heads out of their asses.

“We knew as soon as we finished the plans for the crucible how devastating the damage would be. We always knew, that’s on us, not you. We started working with Vault-Tec and some even shadier channels to get enough Vaults built and save as many as we could. We got word out to the other races that were being targeted next.

“The Alliance commissioned a special one just outside Vancouver, the largest of them all, to fit hundreds of marines and personnel in modified sleep pods to wait out the fallout. Help rebuild civilization. Hackett and I conspired to have an entire wing reserved for you, Jane and the crew.”

Tears burn in Shepard’s eyes and he fights to keep his breath even.

“Obviously, we ran out of time. I was worried about your reaction to being benched, after everything you sacrificed and fought for...I know what pride can do. I’ve made plenty of mistakes. You’re a better man than I, John. I didn’t know-“ Anderson’s voice breaks.

“I didn’t know about you and Major Alenko. I should have, even with the war going on. When the transmission ended. The look on your face, it haunts me like few things have.”

Straightening up, Anderson takes a deep breath and grins. “Thank god for your sister, John, pain in my ass she’s been all these years. She just left with your whole damn crew on a ship she hijacked from the salarians and she’s hauling ass to that Vault as we speak. I don’t know if she’ll make it, but if anyone can, she will. I hope one day you’ll forgive me. I’ve only wanted the best for you two. Take care of each other.”

Anderson pauses. “And son, I’m damn proud of you. If you want to stop fighting, you can. As long as you LIVE. Good luck finding him, I wish you all the best.”

The message ends and Shepard’s distantly aware of Nicky licking at the tears on his face and The Boss curling him into a hug as he sobs.


	5. Maybe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s nearly impossible to find time for yourself during a war, nevermind kindling a romance. Shepard starts to plan out his journey and finally allows himself to think about Kaidan.

Since Apollo’s and the start of their romantic relationship, Shepard and Kaidan have only managed a couple dates and none that have panned out as they wanted, but tonight they made it back aboard the Normandy without further mishaps.

The top floor is reserved just for the captain’s quarters so they start exchanging slower and hungrier kisses that turn their mouths pink the moment they pass the second deck. By the time the doors open, their hands are finding places to hold and grab and their breathing is heavy. Together, they slide off each other’s jackets and start kicking off their shoes.

Date night had been a bust, but the evening can still be saved.

The captain’s cabin is still brightly lit from when Shepard left it that morning, data pads left haphazard everywhere without Kaidan to straighten them. The man was wonderfully ocd whenever entering Shepard’s messy zones, probably without even realizing it, but he’s been busy. Groups of coffee cups and miscellaneous objects from missions tossed this way and that in an organized pandemonium. Not usually how he’d want his boyfriend-lover-whatever to see his living space, but it’s Kaidan and Kaidan knows what a tornado he can be. The longer this war stretches on, the more chaotic it gets, and the cabin reflects that.

Not the most romantic of endeavors, but beggars can’t be choosers.

Entering the cabin, Kaidan trips over a boot and crashes into the tank, scattering the fish. For once, Shepard isn’t intimidated with so many eyes bobbing about. Not with Kaidan here, making the most delicious moans with that husky burr of his. He covers the other man’s body with his own and pins him against the shatterproof glass for another eager kiss, and feels warm hands on his ass.

Never before has he been so proud of his workout routine. Fuck.

Kaidan’s laugh alerts him to the fact he said that out loud.

“I swear to god, if one more person interrupts us-“

“YOU’RE interrupting us, John.” Kaidan’s voice is teasing though, his open mouth running along Shepard’s throat, sneaking a nibble against the tendon. God, he loves that hot mouth.

To retaliate, Shepard’s thumbs find Kaidan’s nipples through his thick sweater and brings their hips together to circle until they find the...right...angle...

He’s rewarded with Kaidan gasping and pressing his head back against the tank, lips parting and mouth falling open as he spreads his thighs to better the angle. And the SOUNDS. Kaidan clutches at his upper arms a moment, eyes fluttering as Shepard rolls and pinches his nipples through fabric. One day, with permission, he is going to see if those nipples are sensitive enough to get the biotic off by just playing with them. For now...

“You haven’t even seen my box of toys yet.”

Kaidan’s eyes snap open. “You have a box of toys.”

“Mm hm.”

“Sex toys.”

“That was generally implied.”

“On an active war ship?!”

Shepard grins at him crookedly. “I have a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs if that’s more your speed. Part of the Blasto collection. Actually pretty comfortable.”

The look Kaidan sends him is not one he’s expecting. “That depends, John. Is it your speed?” Kaidan pushes off the glass and slides his hands back down to Shepard’s ass. “You like being handcuffed? Kind of an old school cliche, but if it’s your thing?”

“Uhh.”

Kaidan grins and suddenly those warm hands are gripping his upper thighs right under his ass and lifting. Shepard lets out a small yelp, arms windmilling for balance before smacking into the tank wall and then sliding to Kaidan’s shoulders. Incredulous, he leans down to avoid hitting his head on the ceiling as he’s carried to the bed and stares down at Kaidan’s ass. It’s a great view. Kaidan deftly avoids the pile of artifacts and objects overflowing from the couch and tossed him gently onto the thick comforter.

“You.” Shepard stared at him with wonderment. He’s had his fair share of sexploits, just about every kind of lover. The easy familiarity Kaidan has with him probably comes from knowing each other so long, but he’s never had a lover manhandle him the way he does. It’s kinda nice. Really nice.

Kaidan raises an eyebrow as he pulls off his sweater. “Too much?”

The ‘no’ is soft and falls heavier than it should from his mouth and Kaidan pauses with his pants around one ankle to look at him. “Hey. You ok?”

Shepard smiles bright and wide, pulling off his shirt before reaching for him. Kaidan chuckles and they’re both smiling into a kiss as he puts a knee on the bed and starts working on Shepard’s fly. He’s doing a wonderfully terrible job, thumbs rubbing along each side of his dick through the denim with long strokes as their dog tags tangle between them.

“Mmm.” Shepard leans away from the kiss to rest his forehead on Kaidan’s and rolls his hips into it. “You keep that up, this will be over quicker than a shootout in Afterlife.”

The thumbs knead gently at his balls before pulling away. “You see, if I didn’t know better, I’d say your infamous stamina is lacking today.”

Groaning, Shepard falls back on the bed. “Every single time we’ve tried to be alone in the last two weeks we’ve been cockblocked by mercenaries, politicians and even a goddamn burst pipe.”

“It probably would have worked out better if we hadn’t been acting like a couple of horny teens. I mean, really? Udina’s terrace? We’re just lucky it was the pipe.”

“You DO realize someone sabotaged that, right? No way the Keepers would have missed it.”

Kaidan snickers and tugs off Shepard’s pants. “It’s not like you haven’t been jerking off.”

“Well.”

Shepard’s underwear pauses on its journey to follow his pants as Kaidan stares down at him, surprised, holding his ankle in midair. It’s a great view, and if his dick wasn’t ready to explode, he’d have happily stayed as they were. “Not even in the shower?”

Right. His new lover is well aware of his de-stressing habits. It’s a new way for them to relax together after a mission or assignment, and Kaidan happily takes advantage of the private shower when he can. Shepard is still rehearsing ways to ask him to just move in. He’s tempted just to bring the other man’s stuff into his quarters, especially since Kaidan already uses the Starboard Observation lounge as his quiet place.

Pouting, Shepard wiggles his foot and brings the other up to cage Kaidan in closer and lord, why isn’t he naked yet?! They probably don’t have much time, but he wants to lick at the crescent scar on the biotic’s hip and bite the tiny freckle on his ass. And he wants to ask him about rimming because it’s a top three fantasy, but it isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. Shepard fights a snigger at the dirty thought and says, “It’s not as fun without you.”

It’s impossible to classify the sound Kaidan makes, but the look he sends before kissing Shepard looks dangerously like love. They’ve only been together a month, captured moments here and there where they can. Just like this, falling into each other, laughing as much as gasping.

“Fuck, John.”

“I’m trying!”

“Oh my god, you’re terrible.”

Waggling his eyebrows gets him a smack, but Kaidan tugs off his underwear finally and then Shepard helps him with his and YES, there’s that lovely cock. Thick and tapered just a bit, not scary big. Hnng. Shepard isn’t picky about his sexual partner’s bits, but Kaidan’s are fucking A plus.

Shepard wraps his legs around Kaidan and pulls himself up enough to rub them together. His muscles protest, still recovering from their last mission, but he doesn’t care. A message chirps from his terminal.

“Fuck! EDI, please tell me that’s not a priority message?” he asks even though he knows he has the alerts set to only serious hails.

“I can not do that, Shepard. However, you and the Major will be happy to find out it is not time sensitive.”

“Oh thank god.” Shepard clutches at Kaidan’s ass though, suddenly reminded of how little time they may have for this. “Please, please, PLEASE fuck me before some Baron comes screaming to me about a fucking ancient text or Hackett assigns another N7 mission to save the birds?”

Kissing him softly across his clavicle, Kaidan whispers, “Yes, sir.”

Hmm. Shepard starts to wonder if Kaidan would be interested in some role play sometime, but his thoughts are interrupted by a warm hand with gun calluses gripping his erection and tugging at him. He feels tight all over and is on the cusp of groaning out another warning to Kaidan, but then realizes those fingers are covered in Shepard’s pre-come and stroking down until they find that ring of muscle.

“Fuuuuuuuuck.”

Kaidan’s sex smirks are the best and even though they are probably pressed for time, the biotic slowly rubs the heel of his thumb into the muscle, never breaching it.

“I swear to god, you asshole.”

Kissing a bent knee, Kaidan nuzzles at the back of it before sneaking a taste...just as that thumb stops circling the the sensitive skin and slips inside. The noise that escapes Shepard is some weird sort of croon and again he’s amazed at the sex he has with Kaidan. The other man likes to explore his lovers where Shepard will usually just bluntly ask his what they like. And while sometimes those explorations fail, other times Shepard is shocked about things it reveals about his own body.

Like the fact the area behind his knees is connected to his dick, he learns as Kaidan’s tongue slips out in between small kisses against the sensitized skin. It’s mildly discomforting when the wet flesh cools in the air but he’s already excited to explore this.

Then Kaidan’s dragging his mouth in a VERY distracting manner down his thigh as the thumb is exchanged for a finger so the thumb can get busy stretching the relaxing ring of muscle while the finger mimics what Shepard really wants.

“Did you get the capsules?”

“Thank fucking god. Yes! They’re in the crate by the nightstand.”

Kaidan’s eye go a bit wide as he sees the size of said crate and he laughs. “How many did you get?”

“Probably enough to last a couple years even if we bunny fuck every day. I even got them in fun shades and flavors.”

“Did you, no, please tell me fun doesn’t mean what I think it does?”

Shepard almost whines at the loss of the warm hands on him as Kaidan goes to explore the crate. “I swear I didn’t get anything too adventurous this time! I even ordered extra of that weird one you like.”

Kaidan opens the crate to find thousands of lubricant capsules and a smaller crate next to it of shield condoms. Fishing out a box of classic lube, he holds up a box of the shields. “Wrap it or go bare?”

Feeling your man’s jizz crawl out of your hole may not be the classiest, but having raw sex when you know it’s safe was incredible.

“With our luck? Wrap it.” However, not knowing what the priority message is, the last thing he needs is making a dangerous mission more interesting than it needs to be.

Kaidan climbs on the bed and eases a clear capsule inside. Shepard can barely feel it, but almost instantly the damp heat from his body melts the shell and the lube spills out to coat him. Kaidan’s sliding the shield on himself with one hand until the thin metal ring reaches the root of his cock and reaches to finger his lover with the other, stretching carefully and spreading the lubricant, before running the hand covered in lube over himself. Marvels of the modern age, shield condoms and lube capsules. And a time saver.

Recent sex with Kaidan and the occasional toy makes prep quick, his cockhead slides in with ease and Shepard fights not to push forward for more. Teasing him, Kaidan pulls out to pat the head of his cock against where he’s slippery and pink before starting to slide back in again. Frustrated, Shepard wills himself not to fall bait.

Instead, he lets his legs fall open and Kaidan helps by gently pushing at his knees, leaning over him for a soft, lazy kiss. That amazing cock stretches him open more and more until Kaidan’s balls are pressing against him and he can feel the lube drooling down. Kaidan waits a moment, considerate asshole he is, and then rolls his hips gently, not really back yet.

“Good?”

Warm hands run up and down his flank and his outer thigh, Kaidan is always so wonderfully warm, nails gently leaving pink marks on his pale skin and making him shiver. “Fuck yes.” Shepard lifts his ass until his hips are more in Kaidan’s lap and he can really feel him deep inside.

Soon he’ll have to convince Kaidan to use his biotics during sex.

Kaidan gives him another kiss and then finally, finally, starts fucking him. Shepard adores the way the man covers him when they have sex, staying close for kisses and the occasional bite, but he really loves it when the other man sets a hard pace, leaving an ache he’ll feel for hours.

“What?!” Kaidan’s thrusting stops and Shepard whines as he pulls them abruptly to the side and looks at the edge of the bed...

“BOO.”

Shepard’s face is utterly scandalized as he hurriedly grabs a pillow and tucks it over them before Kaidan can get pissed off that he forgot to close the cage. The space hamster chitters happily, one could even say smugly, as he climbs the small mountains of quilt.

“Boo! Out! OUT!”

The hamster cocks it’s head as if he’s listening, but doesn’t move until EDI helpfully opens the cabin door. Disconcerting, but both men have had time to get used to her helpful ‘presence’.

Boo’s nose angles towards them curiously, whiskers twitching, before he scampers off the bed and runs out the door. EDI shuts the door and they can see the lock turn red.

“Thanks, EDI.”

“You’re welcome, major.”

Their eyes meet and they collapse together, giggling like teenagers.

“Your face! Not even batarian slavers or Finch have ever managed such a look of indignance!”

Shepard sighs as he starts to get his breath back, leaning into Kaidan’s arms and gently rubbing their hips together. “Sorry. I swear to god. I know space hamsters are far more intelligent than earth hamsters, but this is ridiculous.”

Kaidan brushes their noses together and kisses Shepard’s temple. “How the hell did you of all people end up with a pet rodent, anyway?”

Shepard continues the slow hip rolls to keep their cocks interested and thinks, if he was going to tell anyone... “Jane and I weren’t talking. A lot of things went down after Horizon, but I never thought we’d ever stop talking. We’d always stayed in contact: through the Reds, her getting promoted to Spectre, Mindoir. I felt lonely. Some of the old crew were on board, but it wasn’t the same. And you-“ He hated pointing fingers at Kaidan about Horizon, but Kaidan is nodding.

“Yeah, me. I know you didn’t really blame me, but after I found out everything that happened? That they used you to control Jane? I felt like a heel. I should have trusted you-“

“Ahhh.” Shepard whispered into his ear. “But that was the issue, wasn’t it? You didn’t know if it was us. I get it.”

“You more than me.” Kaidan sighs and slides a leg between Shepard’s. “So, you just saw Boo and decided he would be your confidant?”

Snickering, Shepard’s hands find Kaidan’s cute ass and he starts kneading the cheeks. His thumb finds that little freckle, and he spreads the cheeks open to the room, letting his fingers trail down to tickle his nails against sensitive flesh. Kaidan squirms delightfully into him. “I thought he was a cute little bastard and I was already regretting buying him when some idiot tried to mug me on the way back to the Normandy. Boo took out one of his eyes and made the guy piss himself. Decided there was more to him than met the eye. Certainly keeps things interesting around here.”

“Mmm. He does. So. Wanna try this again?”

“Fuck yes.” This time Shepard gets on his knees, back arched and knees spread as Kaidan sinks in and this time he pushes back to meet him, clenching his muscles eagerly. “Ooooohhh yes.”

More kisses on his shoulder and then Kaidan finds his pace from earlier, wet smacks filling the air as his balls meet Shepard’s perineum. The feeling of being plowed open is one Shepard has missed, though he hasn’t bottomed in awhile, and instead of reaching for his swinging cock to help things along, he rushes to meet Kaidan’s thrusts.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, come on. I think, oh damn. I think.” He thinks he could almost come like this. Just as he’s reaching to tug at his balls, once again Kaidan is stopping. “No, no, no, no, no, no!”

He turns to complain, but then sees the look on Kaidan’s face as he clutches at his leg and pulls his toes back. Immediately, he moves so that amazing cock slips from him properly and he grabs at the biotic’s leg to help him work out the cramp. “Why did we think we could get away with one night for ourselves?”

Kaidan huffs, still pulling his foot back to stretch the rock hard muscle. “Because you look hot trying to deface public property and you love my ass in those jeans?”

“I knew you loved my bad boy image.” Shepard feels the cramp start to ebb a little, and keeps up the massage. For all his aches from their last mission, Kaidan has to be feeling worse. The Spectre and Liara had been put through hell trying to outrun Cerberus troops back to the LZ, since their part of the mission had been data retrieval on the far end of the base. Kaidan had shown up at the rendezvous with the injured asari over his shoulder as she annihilated their chasers with biotics.

The image had made Shepard more than a little horny and he’d cornered Kaidan in his private shower as soon as they got back. His knees killed him later, but the prolonged stupefied look on his lover’s face made up for it.

“Feel better?”

Kaidan kisses the tip of his nose. “Thanks, Johnny.”

“No problem.” He tries to fight the excited feeling welling up in him at the nickname. Anyone else and they would have ended up with a broken nose.

They end up at the head of the bed, exchanging soft kisses with Kaidan’s legs extended to prevent another cramp and their hands wrapped around their erections until they’re both spilling into a shield. The shields are pulled off, the condoms wiping their softening dicks clean as they go and are tossed into the handy trash bin placed by Shepard’s bed for this exact purpose.

“One day, you’ve gotta show me this toy box of yours,” Kaidan murmurs as they fight sleep, cuddled together and needing a shower. Maybe just a small nap? EDI would wake them. Probably by blasting Raiders of the Lost Ark at full volume again.

“Mmm.”

Shepard feels the temperature dropping in the room as dreams tug at the corners of his mind, EDI following their nightly routine.

Seeing Kaidan’s eyes struggling to stay open and focus on his, he leans close until their noses are just touching. “Losto vae. Harthon gerithach aeair vilui.”

Kaidan’s eyebrows furrow sleepily. “That sounds familiar. What language is that?”

Shepard’s small grin is serene, but his heart is racing. “Guren min gaim lin. Le melithon anuir, thalionen.”

“Hmm. Keep your secrets.” Kaidan yawns wide until his eyes water and he snuggles so he’s properly spooning Shepard. “Fer now anyway. I’ll fin ou’ laer...”

Then the room fills with Kaidan’s little snuffle snores and Shepard sinks into his embrace and prays he forgets the words. At least until Shepard’s ready for him to know he learned nerdy Sindarin for him and which words specifically.

 

*~N7~*

When The Boss offers a drink again, this time he accepts it. He feels lighter than he has in months, grinning around the bottle’s mouth and taking small sips. It’s only a hope, but Jane is the most stubborn bitch in the galaxy and more than that? All sibling bullshit aside, she would destroy the world to make him happy. Anderson’s right, if anyone can make it happen, she can.

Shepard spares a thought for Anderson’s fate, but then focuses on letting himself get drunk for the right reasons. The Boss has her own cocktail and has already shouted for one of her many kids to bring files of information, before sitting back down with a map.

As much as Shepard wants to haul ass to Canada, Garrus still needs him. Of course, Shepard will be lording it over him for years to come.

“So it’s called Meridian?”

“Yup. Some sort of project put in place by an organization called the Andromeda Initiative. Originally, they were planning on finishing those arks and taking them to Andromeda to restart civilization should the worst happen, but they ran out of time, got attacked by Reapers. They compiled their resources and rebuilt their assets for terraforming the planet after the worst of the fallout dispersed. They woke up years ago, but they’ve run into so many problems since then. Only recently did they get the more important equipment up and running. It’s lead by the Pathfinders picked for the mission. The human’s division is run by the Ryders.”

“No chance one of them is Alec Ryder?”

The Boss nods to the N7 patch on his suit. “Yeah, used to wear one of those on all his gear. He died a year ago trying to fix some of that equipment.” A sad look passes over her face. “Raiders attacked and it was his life or one of his kids.”

Shepard thinks of the one mission he’d completed with Alec. The man had been such a jackass, but a jackass with good intentions and an even better soldier. “I always assumed he’d go down with guns blazing, but now I don’t see him dying any other way. He wasn’t close with his kids, but damn he was proud.”

She sighs and gives a small smile. “Yeah, the twins run the place now. Annoys the hell out of the other division heads, but the staff won’t follow anyone else for some reason. They’ve got a dextro farm up, but they’ve had problems. Either way, it’s the place to be. All the xenos that pass through here are usually on their way there. They have state of the art machinery and it’s only a matter of time before the farming works out.” She reaches over to tap his Omni-Tool on. “They’re not military, but they’ve all got these. Newer. I think Liam called them Adapts?”

Recalling a conversation between Tali and Kaidan, Shepard wonders if the mysterious sub-division was the AI. “Adapytics, I believe. Thanks, Boss.”

She smiles wide at him. “Of course sweetheart. We can put you up here for the night if you want. My eldest just moved out to be with his girlfriend. Lord, that boy, but you can stay in his room if you want. That or with Eliot’s people in the cottage. They usually just all share the same bed, anyhow. Those three aren’t fooling anyone.”

“Thank you, I appreciate it.”

“Of course! And if you’re not ready for bed, The Roadhouse is open for most of the night. My son’s in the band playing tonight. I could be bias, but I think they’re pretty great.”

Shepard sits up. “What kind of music?”

“Classic rock and country with a bit of this and that. Music fan?”

Lifting up his left arm, he shows off a display on the Omni-Tool. “Over three thousand songs and counting. Well.” He looks dubiously at the lack of extranet feed. “Maybe just the three thousand or so.”

The Boss pats his arm as she stands, a bit wobbly and giggling. “Don’t worry. With The Hub fully functioning and your Alliance people waking up? We’ll have things up and running in no time. Come on! Let’s get you settled. Ellen and Jo serve a decent burger at the bar and their tato tots are amazing.”

“Tato tots and burgers?” Shepard’s eyes light up as he follows her, map clutched in one hand and Nicky quick at his side.

The burger is better than he imagined, though he also hasn’t had one since before he and Jane graduated as N7s. Ellen offers him a selection of meat for it, but the second she mentions mole rat it’s a done deal. The band is good, but more than that, they know how to work a crowd. Eliot Spencer is a great singer and The Boss’ son plays a great guitar behind him. He hasn’t felt this good...ever, without Jane or one of the others at his side. It almost feels as if he’s still in that pod, dreaming the centuries away.

Eliot’s partners Alec and Parker sit close to the stage to watch, and with their help and The Boss’ he gets a good idea of how to get to Meridian. There’s a mix of people at The Roadhouse, the riders and runners, sure, but he recognizes mercenaries, hunters and traders. Ellen pets her shotgun in front of the rowdier looking stragglers, but most of the crowd is there to enjoy the night. Hours later, he finds himself chasing the cooler night air outside and wanders through town. Nicky gets up from her perch on the park bench just outside the bar and goes with, keeping even with him but exploring the nooks and crannies with her curious nose.

The rush of the river is a constant sound, so he follows the strung up lights illuminating the ‘streets’ until the buildings fade a bit into the woods caught in the circle of the protective walls. He finds a small clearing on a cliff overlooking waterfalls where the moon reveals more than the lighting and sits in the grass. Here, the water almost smells like the sea and he feels a longing for hours spent by the seaside, meditating.

And Kaidan.

Sighing deeply, he finally allows himself to think of that last morning, with Kaidan in the usual position of spooning him. The beep of a priority message waking them and EDI informing them it can wait an hour, so they’d snuggled back into each other. The familiar trailing of Kaidan’s fingers in his chest hair over the tattoo, their legs tangling and rubbing together sleepily. They’d been lazily touching each other until Shepard got impatient, trapping Kaidan’s hand on his hip and bringing it to his erection as he rubbed his ass into Kaidan’s stiffening cock.

Shepard lays back in the grass, drunk mind happily swimming over the memory of Kaidan fucking him slow and easy from the side that last morning. The way Kaidan said a resigned “dammit” when he realized there was jizz in his hair and the hard slap he gave Shepard’s ass when he’d spread more in it to style the wild curls.

The closer and closer they’d gotten to finishing the crucible the more frantically they’d tried to find time to be together, but it was almost impossible. Kaidan moved in that last week, but he could probably count on one hand the amount of times they’d found time to be together since Apollo’s.

If he finds...when he finds Kaidan and the others, he’ll bring him back here. Maybe on their way to the coast?

  
“~Maybe You’ll Sit And Sigh,  
         Wishing That I Were Near.  
                Then Maybe You’ll Ask Me To Come Back Again.~”

Voices and music drift up from below at the water’s edge and he’s suddenly made aware of the fact he hasn’t so much as touched himself since that fateful morning. “Fuck.” Looking down he can see where the memories of Kaidan have made him stiff and starts reaching down...until he remembers Nicky. He side eyes her before groaning and dropping back into the grass. “Fuuuuuuck.”

Nicky swivels an ear to catch the word, but doesn’t move otherwise.

“Shepard.”

“Yes, EDI?”

“I’ve located another cache right outside the walls to the north.”

He sighs and sits up. “Thanks, EDI. I guess we’ll get that in the morning.”

Resolving to find some time alone with his dick at some point, minus mole rats, he returns to The Roadhouse where the band is finishing their last set. Eliot and his partners give him reign over the garage to modify his armor and weapons, and a room in the cottage. Shepard falls asleep warm from booze and Nicky sprawled on his feet. He wakes a few times during the night until he convinces the dog to lie back to back with him.

  
The dreams are shapeless, but feel like warm arms around him.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will have art. Eventually. I have it half completed, but unfortunately the muse is currently being smothered by my depression. Eh. We’ll get there. Same with the next chap. I definitely want to do two art pieces for the next one. Hopefully on time :3
> 
> EDIT: Did the quick doodle.


	6. Home On the Wastes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Interesting things happen on a war ship and Shepard finally makes headway in his journey.

“Commander, I should inform you that Spectre Shepard is on board. She requests your presence.”

Shepard sighs, leaning into the hot water spray and letting it beat against his face. He can’t even enjoy a ten minute shower on his own ship. What does she want now? “Thanks, EDI.”

“Of course, Shepard.” Out of all of them, EDI remains unwaveringly professional, with just a little humor thrown in now and again.

Turning off the shower and groaning at his sore muscles and scrapes, he turns to grab a towel and finds...air.

Of course the first time he uses the crew’s showers he finds his uniform missing. Shepard has been good at maintaining his Commander persona since he was liberated from Alliance house arrest, getting back to business and even wearing his uniform crisp everyday. 

Now, the Reapers are finally arriving with their destructive forces in droves and every race is hurrying to finish the crucible. Things should feel more structured in the Alliance during war times. By the book. But no one has had to deal with something galaxy-destroying like the Reapers before and the Normandy has always run by her own rules. It’s only a matter of time before a prank war started to ease tension.

Eyebrows raising, Shepard smirks and leaves the bathroom onto the deck, dripping wet and wearing only his dog tags. The elevator is in immediate range, so no one notices him until he’s stepping out into CIC. He makes it about five feet before the crew starts looking up from their screens to glance at him, only to do double and triple takes. One crewman manages to stutter a respectful “Commander” while the others fail at maintaining their duties.

Maybe he should do this more often, if they’re that easily distracted?

Pressly seems scandalized until he just rolls his eyes and turns back to his task. 

Reaching the bridge, he drops into the navigator’s chair and puts his feet up above the console, crossing his legs at the ankle and giving quite the view as he stretches his arms above him. Joker finishes his specs and turns to him, only to sputter and put his hands up protectively in front of his eyes.

“Dammit, Shepard! I didn’t need anymore fodder for my nightmares. EDI! Why didn’t you warn me the Commander was freeballing?!”

“I was not aware you needed warning, Jeff. Do you not ‘carry the same equipment’?”

“Sure, sure. Why the hell aren’t you saving that shit for Kaidan? Not to mention the crew probably hasn’t been laid in-. Dammit!” Shepard had gotten up to lean over and check a reading, letting things...hang out. “CLOTHES, man!”

Shepard smiles down at him. “Well, I can’t exactly do that now, can I? Kaidan’s laid up in the cabin.”

Joker frowns. “Migraine? He rarely got those on the SR-1. The Council must be putting him through his paces.”

“Council’s not the only one.”

“Ew, man.”

“Love is love, Joker.”

“That’s not what I mean and you know it. You and Jane are like my extended family. The black sheep with red hair, more than a little mildly fucked up.” Shepard has to nod at that. Joker tried calling him John during the Cerberus trials. It was too weird.

“Hmm.” He sways closer to him, hip nudging a shoulder, things swinging.

“What do you want?” Joker sounds resigned, now is the time to strike.

“Apparently, a prank war is going on. Probably started before I was brought into it. I just wanna know who took my underwear, maybe even who the ring leader is, and you’ll be out of my-“ Shepard looks down at himself “-hair.”

Joker’s nose crinkles at the implications and tries valiantly to look away from his groin. “That’s all? It was probably Donnelly. Kid’s been acting more squirrelly since Daniels started helping out with the shuttle repairs.”

“Was that so hard?” Shepard pats him on the shoulder and walks away...

...only to feel a pinch on the sensitive skin just below his ass. It takes all his training not to react and he looks over his shoulder at Joker.

“Nice tatts.”

Shepard blows him a kiss and continues on. “EDI, where are my sister and Kenneth located?”

“Your sister is visiting Dr. T’Soni and Engineer Donnelly is in the cargo bay.”

He really shouldn’t have asked, because as he draws abreast with Liara’s cabin the asari is already poking her head out the door to see what’s going on. “John?”

“Hey, Liara!”

Unlike the rest of his crew, Liara’s eyes do a nice long sweep of his body before giving him an impish grin. Strangely, he feels a blush coming. “Hmm. I can see why the crew has been in upheaval.”

Stepping into her quarters, he sees his sister sprawled out on the bed in the back, wearing little more than he is. Well, at least someone got the Shadow Broker to take a break finally.

It’s as she’s rolling over to see who’s entering that he sees Boo. The space hamster is acting weird, even for him. He’s running the length of the bed to the folded over quilt, climbing to the top, and then falling backwards and rolling down. Only to do it all over again.

“If he gets sick on my bed, Jane-“

“Don’t worry, Ari, I’m-“ Jane’s eyes widen in horror as she sees her twin. Screeching, she grabs a pillow and throws it at him. “Fucking COVER yourself, John Boy! No one wants to see your small dick!”

“Doesn’t look so small to me, Jane,” Liara murmurs as she saunters back over to her wall of computer screens and promptly starts ignoring them.

Boo pauses in his adventures to look at his human, wobbling side to side, and then starts chasing after a bottle that has just enough batarian liquor in it to make it glow orange-red.

“Is he DRUNK?”

Jane stares petulantly at the hamster as he spins the bottle, round and round and round. “No. Well. I gave him a couple drops out of my flask. Whatever. John, we should talk. After you’re done putting some clothes on.”

“Hmm.” He narrows his eyes at her, but she refuses to look at him. Whether it’s guilt since she’s always been a little jealous of Boo or the fact her brother’s balls were still on display, he can’t say.

“I’ve got to talk to Donnelly first. I’ll meet you in the galley in fifteen. Make coffee.”

As he’s leaving, he half turns to make a comment about her own undress, but his eye catches on something. Jane isn’t really part of the Alliance anymore. Officially, they made her a liaison to the Council and he’s pretty sure he got to keep being Commander of the Normandy so they could benefit from her being a Spectre. Either way, there’s no reason for her to keep dog tags.

Except he knows those aren’t hers. She’s been wearing his old ones since Miranda woke her up to help Cerberus stop the Collectors, while he’d been comatose and kept under lock and key. But that extra shine?

“You still have that hunk of junk?” It’s meant to be teasing, but it falls soft.

Jane absently toys with the steel four leaf clover he’d found during his desperate escape from the Reds. It served as a bit of luck to him for years, before they graduated the N7s together and he gave it to her for ‘safe keeping’.

“After it saved my ass on Akuze? Fuck yeah! Now go put some fucking clothes on, loser, before someone goes blind.”

Chuckling off the warm squishy feelings, he leaves and wonders how long he can make Donnelly sweat before he realizes Shepard’s joining the prank war.

Kaidan is going to be irritated he missed out. That’s ok, Shepard will make it up to him.

 

~*N7*~

The next morning he wakes to a heavenly smell.

“Is that coffee?!” He doesn’t even recall the steps that brought him downstairs to the kitchen, but Parker gives him an impish look before she disappears out the window, in head to toe black with her blond hair swinging free. Alec is leaning hunched over a small computer at the table, buried in a blanket to fight the morning chill coming from the window and only his dark hands can be seen. Nicky is curled up around his feet under the table.

Eliot has a bandana keeping his long hair back as he cooks breakfast on the stove, face serious but blue eyes twinkling at his bewilderment. “Don’t mind her. She likes to keep her skills sharp as much as she likes to keep company on their toes.” He grins at Shepard. “Help yourself to coffee. We’re going through the stock we’ve found and kept. The people at Meridian are finally producing it.” 

Shepard could cry he’s so happy. A hasty “thanks” in the musician’s direction and then he’s inhaling the coffee black from the closest mug he can find. It’s hot and it burns enough he can barely taste it, strong as it is, but Cerberus rebuilt his stomach and he takes shameless advantage. He sits at the table next to Alec and peers at the computer to see designs for the communications towers.

Just as his stomach grumbles, Eliot wordlessly refills his cup and drops a plate in front of him. Shepard stares in awe at the picture perfect breakfast laid out before him. Alec pauses his typing to nudge him with a grin. “You’ll want to eat that before it gets cold. You probably won’t ever have a meal like that again.”

“Shut up, Hardison.” Eliot’s cheeks seem to be fighting a blush and Shepard feels sucked in by their dynamic.

“Sure thang, sweet cheeks.”

Eliot growls, threatening him with a spatula, but turns back to clean up.

An hour later he’s got his gear loaded onto the motorcycle. Cooper and Pete have been officially adopted, but Nicky is still glued to his side. He carefully paints N7 on the side car from leftover paint he’d used on his modded armor the night before and finds goggles for the dog to wear. Parker gives her a little backpack with goodies and Alec a red Nuka Cola scarf. Alice gives him a missile launcher with a wink, saying he’ll definitely be needing it in the near future. Shepard doesn’t know how to show his gratitude to all these people helping him. 

The Boss just waves his attempts off.

“Honey, that message has been haunting us since we heard it. We’re just glad to be able to help you. Most people know you’re a hero, what you and the others did. But be careful, some people out there are just hurting for someone to blame.” Despite her much shorter stature, she manages to peck him on the cheek and then slaps his ass in the direction of the bike.

Becoming quite the celebrity overnight, he’s given a large send-off and some more supplies. Ellen’s daughter Jo gives him a whole canister of tato tots and Nicky some jerky treats. It’s with great reluctance he rides out, first hitting up the cache.

There’s plenty of ammo and some decent weapons he exchanges, but there’s also a lot of, “Bottlecaps?”

“Bottlecaps have replaced online trading and credit chits for currency.”

“Ok, interesting.”

The route everybody gives him seems to be a straight shot maintained by the runners and riders.They take breaks whenever Nicky starts pawing at him and run into less interference as the land stretches out and becomes flat. Alec has mapped out some places for him to stop on his way, but the husky-like dog just naps in her side car so he stops only a couple of times. 

Kane’s is a tavern only a mile off the highway, owned by Eliot and his crew, but run by a man with an intense blue stare who curiously tilts his head at the dog. The only emotion he shows is keen excitement when a pair of hunters come in behind Shepard, which he’s ignored for. The brothers’ presence probably explains the lack of monster activity in the area. He grabs the forgotten key on the desk and heads up to have a fitful rest. Once again, he fights the dog for sleeping positions.

The bottlecaps come in handy the next morning for their stay and he opts out of breakfast to get going on the road. Music helps the miles fly by and he happily rediscovers a genre of country that Nicky croons along to, much to his surprise and delight.

 

“~Oh Give Me A Home Where The Bighorners Roam,  
Where The Mole Rat and Fire Gecko Play,  
Where Seldom Is Heard, A Discouraging Word,  
And My Skin Is Not Glowing All Day.~”

Out here the sky is huge, unhindered by mountains and tall trees. Abandoned farmland flies by and he can spot a couple towers The Hub must be working on. A few side roads boast varying dangers or small settlements for trading and he soaks in this new civilization as the cursor in his eyepiece brings him closer to Meridian.

Riding this many miles is tough on his body, so he indulges in the stimpaks he’s collected or made. It’s two days since he left The Hub when he finally reaches the outskirts of Meridian. The thickening vegetation is a dead giveaway, based on the information he’s learned about the terraforming. Alice and Carlos warned him that Meridian is not a settlement, nor is it typically open to traders or passing settlers.

Turning down back roads, the trees grow taller and he can feel eyes on him. Sentries probably. Nicky is alert and standing against the small windshield of the sidecar as the motorcycle slows, ears flickered forward and whining ever so slightly, but her tail wags in intervals. She’d growled and almost bit a few assholes the other night, to Ellen’s great pleasure, so he’s pretty confident in her judgment of character.

The cursor alerts him to the fact he’s arrived and he tucks the Fusion away from the road and continues on foot. Nicky runs around him and into the underbrush and back again. There’s no obvious entrance he can see, or signs, but looking up he sees a thinning in the forest ceiling so he heads over and...

...that is NOT a thing he expects to see.

Shouldering his weapons, he scans the area and heads down into the clearing. Running down one side is a small brook and beside it...is a very attractive, very naked man, sunbathing. Apparently. He lays on a blanket with a small bag close by, but as Shepard edges closer, he can see the shape of a gun under the blanket by an outstretched hand and the gleam of dog tags around his throat.

“Afternoon!” Shepard stops a small distance away and fights not to stare. But, art appreciation, right?

One bright blue eye peers at him from where the man rests his face in the crook of an arm, but the guy instantly loses his mysterious factor as Nicky charges forward eagerly, tail wagging and nose diving for his face. “Hey! What! Dude, no!”

The man startles upright, seems to remember his nudity and falls back down to hide himself, only to be subjected to the dog’s affections again. “Argh!” The blanket ends up wrapped around his waist so he can sit up and pet the husky to avoid kisses. “SAM, why didn’t you warn me?!”

Leaning back on one heel, Shepard crosses his arms. “Sam the guy in the sniper nest?”

“That would be Avitus.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Turian?”

Pausing in his petting, the man looks up at him, eyes sharp as they take in his mixed armor, Vault suit with patches and the glimmer of his Omni-Tool. “Who ARE you?”

“John. I’m trying to reach Meridian for dextro resources. I’ve got a turian popsicle who’s going to be needing it soon.”

The man sneaks on some pants and Shepard is relieved he no longer has to keep his gaze so fixed. “Scott,” the man says and holds out his hand for a shake.

There’s a similar orange glimmer on Scott’s wrist and the chain only boasts one dog tag. “Scott Ryder?”

“Depends on who’s asking.”

Smirking, Shepard can just make out movement in the corner of his eye, EDI confirms on the eyepiece that the sniper is coming down from his nest. “I knew your dad. Kind of an asshole, good soldier.”

“Yeah, that sounds like him.”

“Really fucking proud of his kids.”

“That DOESN’T sound like him.”

The shape leaving the tree line is definitely turian, male, with a really nice looking sniper rifle slung over one shoulder. “Alec wasn’t exactly the best at expressing himself, but he did mention you and your sister once. Something about her on a dig and you getting a promotion? The Boss told me about his death; I’m sorry for your loss.”

Scott watches him with narrowed eyes, trying to figure him out until he spots the discreet N7 patch and the paint job on his armor. “Yeah, well. Thanks. Avitus! You decided to finally join us!”

The turian glares at him. “Are you finished with your idiotic notions?”

Good to know the translators still work. Shepard has to wonder what wastelanders hear when xenos speak. “And what idiotic notions are those?”

It’s strangely amazing to see irritation flare across a turian’s face again. “Showing off. Playing bait. Take your pick. I don’t know why you humans can’t just court normally.”

Scott humphs and gathers his things. “Just because you’re happily mated, doesn’t mean you can give me shit.”

“Just TALK to him, Ryder. It’s got to be better than playing bait for raiders.”

“Come on, you and SAM have my back.”

Avitus glares. “Because your sister is meeting with Macen and didn’t want any distractions. Namely, your death.” He turns to eye Shepard. “You. You seem familiar. Who are you?”

“John.”

“John who?”

Whistles pierce the air from sentries and then the underbrush parts as an all terrain rover toddles through the brook and towards them. Shepard’s eyes widen as it stops only feet away. “Is that a Nomad?!” Damn, he misses the Mako, pain in the ass that it was. There was nothing like being dropped from the Normandy on a mission.

The passenger door rises with a chirp and a man in a red, black and white mechanic’s jumpsuit leans out to give them an easy smile. “Yeah, she is. Beautiful isn’t she?” The man gives a playful glare in Ryder’s direction. “Now if only some people would treat her like the lady she is and stop setting her on fire.”

Scott gives an innocent look as the driver door opens. “Aw, come on, Gil. She’s a veritable badass. She likes a challenge.”

Another man wearing pilot’s wings on his suit emerges to lean against the front of the Nomad, golden eyes sweeping up Ryder’s half naked form. Shepard is pretty sure he’s the only one that catches the way his eyes flicker to Gil after. “Ryder! Why didn’t you tell me you were working on your tan? I could have joined you.”

Scott rolls his eyes, finally glancing away from Gil. “Yes, because you need to work on yours.”

“We still could have had fun.”

Gil is watching them, perplexed, and turns to Shepard. “New guy! Nice looking dog. You looking for someone?”

Avitus pins him with a look. “He’s looking for dextro options. He was just about to tell us his name.”

Sighing internally, he sinks his fingers deep into Nicky’s coat and says, in his best Commander’s voice, “John Shepard, formerly of the SSR Normandy.”

They all stare at him in varying degrees of incredulity.

“Heard about me, huh?”

Scott says, “No shit?”

For once, he’s treated with caution and of course they’re not just going to let him into Meridian without vetting him first. In the meantime, Scott asks if he’s interested in helping them out with a super mutant problem.

“EDI?”

“Super mutants are mutated humans infected by the Forced Evolutionary Virus. They are much larger than humans, with limited intelligence, but with unmatched strength. Their skin varies in shades of blue and green and they are usually quite violent.”

“Towards humans?”

“Towards anything.”

“Great.”

As hesitant as he is about the danger, he brings Nicky with him and a dressed Scott in the Nomad, leaving the Fusion with Gil. They pick up Drack on the perimeter, a cranky, older than dirt krogan that makes him miss Wrex, and travel a day out to some old factories the super mutants have made their home base. Unlike raiders who are cruel and like to play with their victims before killing them in creative ways, super mutants kill and eat their victims indiscriminately.

The factories are at the edge where farmland turns to desert, and the destination is a row of three at the edge of town with smoke stacks rising high. They storm in through the loading docks and find some settlers still alive and set them free as Drack provides distractions with Blood Rage and his favorite shotgun. As soon as the settlers are free and guarded by Nicky, Shepard smiles charmingly at the boys as he voices out an idea for the stragglers still taking potshots at them.

Ten minutes later the main factory is leveling itself beneath a ball of fire and Scott is staring at him with mild hero worship as Drack pats him on the back. Hard. The krogan seems miffed when he doesn’t fall over from the force and then lets out a belly laugh of approval.

“I like you, Shepard. You’re not as squishy as the others.”

“Thanks, Drack. Th-“

“Bigothood at nine o’clock.”

Turning at Scott’s mention, Shepard spots the growing silhouette of a vertibird. They’d been an older means of transport for earth military, with their sleek design relying on dual propeller blades on each ‘arm’ to keep it aloft, but they’re probably more easily maintained and rebuilt than the later models, so he’s not surprised to see them active in the wasteland.

“Bigothood. The Brotherhood faction run by Maxson’s people? How can you tell?” Shepard wonders, looking for something unique about the craft.

Scott laughs and looks through the scope of his rifle. “Maxson’s people can’t keep a bird in the air to save their lives. And their people aren’t as well trained as they think they are, they drop like flies. Everything they know has been stagnantly handed down, generation to generation from before the war. The BoS run by Lyon’s people in the Capital Wasteland and the Minutemen’s general in the Commonwealth are vastly better trained. We’ll know in a few minutes.”

 

“That would be formerly known as the commonwealth of Massachusetts, Shepard.”

“I got that, thanks EDI.”

“Of course.”

Shepard watches as the vertibird eats the distance between them and takes a step back as a high powered mini gun is lowered...”Damn,” he mutters, raising his rifle...just as EDI alerts him on his eyepiece that hostiles are inbound from a nearby building.

The mini gun spins and peppers the ground with bullets until it finds the targets trying to surprise them from behind. The super mutants fall without ever getting a shot off.

“Well, I’m really hoping its Lyon’s people. I’ve had my dose of smug assholery from Tann this week.” Scott looks unconcerned as the vertibird gets close enough to create winds that tug at them, and two figures in power armor leap from each side to land a quarter mile away. Even from here, Shepard can feel the impact of the bulky armor. The Alliance eggheads had started designing the armor two years before the start of the Reaper war, the goal to be a personal tank and more powerful than any previously made armor.

As the figures get closer, Shepard can tell that they’ve recently seen action, hasty patch jobs disrupting the paint. The figure in front is running towards them as fast as the heavy armor allows, the stomps causing ripples through the ground while the companion follows at a more sedate pace and carrying some bags. Nicky barks excitedly and runs out to meet them, circling and jumping around as if it were playtime. The vertibird does a circle of the area before returning in the direction it came from: west.

“What do you think-“ The words spilling out of Shepard’s mouth stop abruptly as he recognizes the paint job when the first figure gets closer.

No. No. No no no no no.

In between bits of metal, jagged with large claw marks and soldered sheets of aluminum, blue can be seen. Blue with stripes of white and a patch of gold over the biceps. There’s a four leaf clover charm hastily welded on over the heart and another patch of gold, much like his lucky charm he’d given away years ago.

She isn’t supposed to be awake. His sister is supposed to be sleeping still, so he can pop open her cryopod and tease her for the next hundred years with sleeping beauty jokes. 

How long? How long has it been that HE has been reexperiencing Noveria in a pod while she was up and searching for him?

Heart pounding and fire burning in his stomach, he slowly walks to meet the figure and holds his breath as her helmet is removed...and his eyes widen. “You-?”

Looking no different than the last time Shepard had seen him, except maybe finally managing to get some color back in his skin, Kaidan smiles brightly at him and answers in a voice huskier than normal, “Me. How’s the tide, Johnny?” It’s the most beautiful thing. His face and hair are damp from sweat, skin covered in grime, but it’s Kaidan and Shepard finds himself grabbing the front of the armor that makes Kaidan tower above him and hoists himself up. Bulky metal arms come to support him against the armor as they kiss. And laugh. And it’s more than likely that the taste is from tears and not sweat, but Shepard can’t give a flying fuck when Kaidan is there, whispering “John” and “Johnny”. Over and over again, just as urgently as their last night together.

And then he hears a demanding squeak and something is hitting his cheek and running around his neck.

“Boo!?”

“Yeah, you should have our boy tell you about how that one went down, Skipper. Jane was pissed.” 

Shepard is left stunned, with his arms around Kaidan’s neck, Boo still running around every part of him as Ashley finishes removing her helmet to smile wetly at them in the dying twilight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *stares*  
> So.  
> Was anybody surprised? :3
> 
>  
> 
> Art to def follow!! Just didn’t want to accidentally give away the chap.


	7. We’ll Meet Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally reunited, Shepard finds out what he missed and they settle down for the night.

It can’t even really be called a diner, its so small, but most things are in the days following the Reaper’s destruction and ensuing fallout. Made out of old prefabs and a trailer, it's more on the shabbier side of eateries Kaidan’s been in since his emergence from the Alliance’s Vault.

The view, however, is easily one of the best. Topan is a small base more than a town, a few klicks east of the seaside town Getty, sitting pretty on a small mountain of struggling green and looking over a war torn ocean on the former Californian coast. The employees usually leave the shutters above the tables open to the invigorating breeze and Kaidan is sitting at his usual table in the corner, in full view of the room, a dog lying beneath the table, snoozing on top of his feet.

Instead of the usual reports and data, he’s pouring over an old paperback novel, half aware of the music on the nearby radio as he scribbles down notes as he reads.

“~Why does the sea rush to shore?~  
          Don’t they know, It’s the end of the world?~”

There are a few others in the room, a hodgepodge of people. The base was originally run by the Brotherhood of Steel, but since the organization started fighting within itself, it fell to the former Paladin Commander on site to take it over and he changed it into a trading post. As long as the rules were followed, everyone was allowed in these days. NCR, Brotherhood, krogan, ghouls, super mutants. The new figureheads in the Brotherhood wrestling for control from the Maxsons had really turned things around.

Despite it’s previous occupation and busy landing pad, Topan is actually safer than any of the nearby settlements and Kaidan has taken off his body armor for once, keeping his pistol and holster on. The radio finished its sad song, the DJ gabbing on about the local rumor mill until fading into another song.

“~So will you please say hello,  
        ~To the folks that I know,  
             ~Tell them I won’t be long.~”

Kaidan finally paused in his studies and pays attention to the music, mind turning. He thought of John, as he always did, but this time of how the commander charged into battle, one of many playlists running on a separate radio channel. Kaidan listened in to John’s music from time to time, curious at the different genres, but never in a fight. It worked for the commander’s concentration, not his.

Though he had to admit, asari drums carried a great beat for battle.

The music that was often played in the wasteland was old, sometimes country, but usually classics from earth’s 1940’s and 50’s. The continent had been going through a resurgence of the time and style when the Reaper’s descended, practically leaving behind time capsules for the survivors.

“~We’ll meet again,  
        ~Don’t know where,  
               ~Don’t know when.~”

Blinking his eyes rapidly, Kaidan looks out back towards the sea and focuses on a radstorm in the distance. The storm has turned the sky dark green with flashes of yellow over its turbulent section of the sea, with radiating lightning and shadows of large, mutated creatures.

It’s been too long since comm specialist Samantha Traynor and the others woke the Normandy crew to help defend their Vault from an attack. Each day feels like a month, every month like years. Somewhere out there, hopefully, John is frozen with Garrus and EDI, waiting. Sure, they have the information Anderson gave Jane on their location, but so much has changed the planet since the war started and ended. Best guess was to get to the location and shout Marco until they got an answering Polo.

Not to mention all the people needing help between here and there. There have been more than a few nights he’s cursed his own integrity, frustrated with such slow progress. Thank god for Ash being there to knock sense into him, getting him drunk when that didn’t work.

Jane had heard whispers of threats leftover from the war that could not be ignored and left for the midwest, keeping an ear out for any information about the Normandy and her final mission. Before leaving, she had cornered him away from the others and he saw how hard it was for her not to dive in after her brother. She gave him the good luck charm and left him in charge of finding John and trying to keep the peace on his way.

“Well, this is depressing.”

Letting out a huff of laughter, Kaidan turned to look at Ephren. The younger man gave him a tiny smile and adjusted his glasses, sliding a bowl in front of him and touching up Kaidan’s coffee.

“Pretty sure you’re right. What is it you’re poisoning me with this time?”

“That was one time! And they were just burnt.”

Kaidan grinned up at his friend, trying not to falter when he saw the answering blush. “Cookies are not your forte. Your mutfruit cake was amazing though.”

“Thank you, thank you. I think I did pretty well on the noodles this time if I do say so myself.”

“Uh huh, then why do I feel like a guinea pig all of a sudden?” An indignant squeak from his hair reminded him of the space hamster nesting there and he gave Boo a little skritch to appease him. Once upon a time, he’d hated having the rodent messing with his hair, so confused at his importance to the commander. Now he was like a lifeline to his lover.

“Because I used razorgrain for the noodles?”

“You’re allergic to gluten?”

Ephren frowned, unsure. “Is that something found in razorgrain? Probably yes, then. Alas!”

Sometimes Kaidan and the others got comfortable with the locals enough that they forgot they didn’t have the ability to share knowledge like before the war. Some former Vault dwellers had access to Pip-Boys, but everything else was in old books, ancient computers and handed down by word of mouth. Ephren‘s parents were the former soldiers from the Brotherhood running the place. Originally loyal to Maxsons’ people, they’d turned on them the instant the Brotherhood tried to punish their son for trying to escape the lifestyle.

Now Ephren was all but running the diner with his sisters as he read book after book, trying to become someone to help better the community and change things. Kaidan and Ashley had intended to only stopover in Topan for that first night, but the younger man had approached them almost shyly, asking for their help against the local raiders that had a nasty taste for dog fighting and worse.

Even this far south, the former Alliance marines had a reputation, which helped when people got stuck on the Brotherhood and NCR gear they usually wore. Now there were fewer sadists in the world thanks to Ash and Kaidan. Topan and Getty had dozens of new furry companions after being freed from the raiders...and little Laika was now using his feet as a bed, safe with her new home in the diner and its patrons.

“Here,” Kaidan murmured, hunting through his Omni-Tool’s storage and fishing out a pill bottle. “Take this a few minutes before a meal and you can have all the razorgrain you want.”

Staring at him and then the pill bottle wide-eyed, Ephren whispered his thanks, before sitting across from him. “How’s uh, how’s the research going?”

Grinning widely, Kaidan looked over his notes. “Great! I can’t thank you enough for finding these books for me. I may not be fluent, but at least I’ve memorized some phrases and words.”

“Hmm.”

Looking up from his book, Kaidan saw a fairly starry eyed look on the other man’s face. The former Spectre hadn’t talked to anyone about John except the crew since waking. Becoming friends with the former scribe, seeing the tell tale signs of a crush forming, Kaidan had haltingly told Ephren about the war hero just named John waiting for him. Somewhere. Hopefully.

To his credit, the other man had only looked mildly stung, before asking millions of questions and getting lost in the story of Kaidan and John. Being very familiar with the libraries in the area, he’d help the biotic hunt down the books he needed for when he next met the love of his life.

A faint thump echos through the ground, the familiar feeling of power armor dropping from a great height a short distance away. Kaidan didn’t think much of it, used to the sensation since becoming a liaison for the Alliance and the Brotherhood.

Taking a fork and spinning it to gather noodles in the bowl, Kaidan brings it to his mouth and Ephren emerges from his daydream to watch his face.

Chewing and trying to place the flavors, Kaidan’s surprised. “This is pretty good. The sauce and veggies are tasty, just, the noodles are a little too overdone.”

Nodding, Ephren gestures to the bowl. “Yeah, I cooked the noodles separate, made sure to-“

The urgent clumping of boots coming up the stairs from outside the diner’s door had Kaidan cautiously reaching for his pistol, but it was only Ashley in her power armor.

Ashley who’s supposed to be on the airship finishing repairs on said armor, who is instead beaming at him in a way that makes him hold his breath, as he’s had many times before. “We’ve got a sighting!”

Instantly, Kaidan is gathering his books, gently nudging the dog off of his feet and stuffing his notes into a pouch on his belt. “Sit rep!”

“He’s only been awake for a few weeks. Apparently EDI woke him when systems in their Vault started breaking down and he made it to Andromeda looking for dextro and supplies. Meridian HQ contacted Liara to verify his story-“

“And she contacted Krem, knowing you’d be there.” Kaidan is beaming back at her. “Is he-“

“The Iron Bull’s contacting the nearest Brotherhood bases to get a bird in the air for us, they owe him a favor or five. I’ve got our packs outside.”

Halfway out the door Kaidan pauses, Ashley running ahead in the corridor to the marketplace and outside. Turning back he sees Ephren watching them, a bright and bittersweet smile on his face. Marching back to him, Kaidan grabs him in a hug, before planting a solid kiss on his cheek. “Thank you, for everything.”

He turns to leave with Ephren staring dumbfounded and Laika trotting after them in excitement.

~*N7*~

  
Logically, Shepard knows it’s better if Kaidan and Ashley stay in their power armor until they reach camp for the night. However, logic flew out the window when he saw Kaidan’s face for the first time in centuries, after thinking he’d never see it again. Now all he wants to do is stay on Kaidan’s power armor like a damn pyjak and exchange kisses until they find camp for the night.

He’s never missed being a teenager more, finding hideaways in barns and secluded ponds with whoever held his eye.

Scott’s watching Kaidan and Ashley with faint hero worship and he feels mild jealousy for the time they must have spent together cultivating it. The young Ryder is all but stumbling over the corpses as he goes to check on the freed settlers, while Nicky abandons her duty to circle around his friends, and even tries climbing the power armor for pets.

Kaidan immediately loves her.

  
Meanwhile, Drack’s checking out the patched power armor and cackling. “Looks like you two have been having fun without us.”

For the first time, Kaidan glances away from Shepard to smirk at the old krogan. “Nest of deathclaws outside New Vegas.” Drack tilts his head curiously and the biotic’s smirk widened. “Two alphas, a queen and a dozen of their offspring.”

The krogan threw his head back to booming laughs as Shepard took a closer look at the man. The subtle graying of the dark hair at his temples, how the tanned skin wasn’t perfectly even across one cheek. Tracing the nearly invisible line from eye lid to chin, Kaidan turned at the gentle touch to bestow a kiss on the curious thumb.

Medi-gel. Had to have been. To have a wound grievous enough to call for it in the wasteland...

“And a deathclaw is..?”

Kaidan opens his mouth to answer, but EDI beats him to it. “The deathclaw is an FEV mutated version of the Jackson’s Chameleon, standing an average of nine to ten feet tall. A bipedal known for their thick hides, long reach and twelve inch razor sharp claws, they are quite deadly.”

Ashley laughed excitedly as she and Kaidan stared at Shepard’s Omni-Tool. “EDI?!”

“How may I be of service, Lieutenant Commander Williams?”

“Er.”  
  
Laughing, Shepard finally climbed down off of the boots of Kaidan’s power armor, but noticed the Major stayed close. “EDI downloaded a tiny portion of her programming into my Omni-Tool to guide me through the wasteland. She’d been pinging drops and caches left behind by her mobile platform until we hit Andromeda, so I don’t think she went any further west.”

“She wasn’t with you when you woke?” Ashley wondered as she dropped their bags off at the Nomad.

“Jane mentioned she got some sort of message from her months ago, but we’d just been getting communications up and it was too degraded.”

Petting an eager Boo, Shepard watched their expressions closely. “Where is she? My sister? The others? How long have you been awake?”

Ashley raised an eyebrow at Kaidan before dragging a curious Scott and amused Drack away to loot the bodies of the super mutants and the warehouses.

“Kaidan?”

The biotic watched him a moment, eyes sad and mouth tight, before hitting the release in his armor. The frame unfolded out and away from his back and he stepped out of the boots of the armor, suddenly much shorter and someone Shepard could fold into his arms with familiarity. Despite the sweat, old and new in the desert twilight, or the pinch of combat body armor between them, it was like coming home and he could almost hear the hum of the Normandy’s deck. The blurble of the fish tank.

The crashing of waves against coastal rock.

Boo didn’t even complain at practically being dropped, dashing off to find Ashley as Shepard tried to quell his fears. Thank god Kaidan was known for having a serious demeanor, or he’d be terrified.

“We rendezvoused with the Normandy as planned, but when I went to confirm with Joker we were on board and ready to meet you, he wouldn’t meet my gaze.” Kaidan’s voice was hoarse against his neck, arms wrapped around his waist. “Anderson was already on board and as soon as our boots hit the deck we were making way to London. I froze. I didn’t know how to react, but the thought of leaving you behind? I started to rage against him, half thoughts of mutiny...until he explained. About finding a place for you to tide out the fallout, him taking your place in activating the crucible.”

The hands on Shepard’s hips tightened as the words continued, like a confession, fingers digging deep like he’d try to escape. “Jane showed up just as we orbited the crucible, with a fancy salarian vessel she’d pirated with Miranda and Jack. The crew that wasn’t already convinced to mutiny and follow you, both of you, were convinced by a rousing speech she pulled out of her ass. Not as good as one of yours, but, I think she’s been taking notes.”

The use of present tense relaxed Shepard enough to allow weak grin.

“Joker stayed behind to pilot the Normandy. He knew he was the only one able to get Anderson close enough.” The first of the bad news then, the taller man rubbed his cheek into hair coarse with dried perspiration and desert sand. Joker had been a good marine and a better friend, but Kaidan had been closer to him. “Liara, Tali, all the main crew came along.” Kaidan snorted. “Your sister tried to threaten me into going.”

“Tried?”

“The only reason I resisted was to go back for your damned space hamster. And these.” Kaidan reached between them to pull out a pair of dog tags from underneath his uniform. Staring in wonder, Shepard’s hand cradled the familiar tags that used to sit displayed by his bed, engraved with his father’s name. The biotic gently laid the chain around his neck, before wrapping his arms around his tall lover again.

A rusty laugh broke free from Shepard as his eyes watered and he rested his chin on Kaidan’s head to watch Ashley smack Drack as they adjusted the Nomad’s rack to carry power armor and loot.

“There wasn’t space enough in your Vault to accommodate us, and not enough time. But heading for the Alliance Vault in Canada gave us enough time to get ahead of the blast. We nearly didn’t get into the Vault, the edge of the blast took our ship down and we only just got in before the radiation and the worst of the destruction hit. We slept for centuries while a smaller satellite Vault was left to maintain ours, but they forgot about us. I don’t know why, but Sam found us while exploring and when there was an assault on the Vault, they woke us. We dealt with the threat. And the others. Jane started getting restless. She wanted to find you. Get information about Anderson and Joker.”

So did Shepard.

“Come on, skipper! We have safe houses we can crash at for the night! Lover boy picked them out, so no telling how full of ‘character’ they are.”

“Dammit, Ash.” Even with the skies turning deepest blue to reveal stars, Shepard could make out a cute blush staining the major’s cheeks.

“Hmm, do tell,” Shepard murmured against his ear.

Kaidan looked up at him through eyelashes, face still pink but smile bright in the moonlight. “You’ll see. I mean, I guess we’ll see. I haven’t seen it in person yet.”

Shepard had to bite back a giggle. Really. A grown man, a badass savior of the galaxy shouldn’t giggle. But he’d missed this stumbling, stuttering side of Kaidan he hadn’t seen since the Normandy SR-1. And to have it brought back because of him wanting to impress Shepard?

Yeah, fucking giggling, but he managed to stifle it before Ash heard. Kaidan saw him and the warm look he sent his goofball commander was full of promise and fondness.

Somehow Shepard managed to convince Ryder to let him drive and take Kaidan’s armor on top of the Nomad with Ashley. Opening the coms on their Omni-Tools, he could hear their whoops of excitement and even Drack was grumbling with envy from the back as Nicky barked excitedly between them. “Your driving is as bad as the kid’s.”

Kaidan sits in the front with him and explains how they all delegated duties and woke a few more from the thousands of sleeping marines and allies to handle them, so that they might finally spread out from their Vault. Jane followed rumors to the east, one such rumor including a huge krogan colony in a sea of radiation. Ash built a relationship with the NCR and Kaidan the Brotherhood of Steel, acting as dignitaries as they moved south with plans to continue east towards Shepard’s last known coordinates.

The people of the wasteland were finding their feet, building, had come so far...but they needed help. Everywhere Kaidan and Ashley went, their help was needed and thus, they were delayed yet again. And again.

“And then we met Krem.”

“Who’s Krem?”

Apparently, Krem was second in command to a group of mercenaries with a conscience, scouting the entire wasteland for jobs or to lend aid. Bull’s Chargers. Also, Ashley’s boyfriend and Kaidan wasted no time in sharing embarrassing stories to make up for all times she teased them on the Normandy.

By the time it was full dark, the land black but for their headlights, they reached the edge of what was once a huge lake. The deeper beds still retained water that glinted in the moonlight, but the once shallow areas were easy enough for the nomad to drive through to the other side. Ashley warned them over the con about mirelurks, some sort of mutated aquatic life as big as a krogan, but EDI and the Omni-Tools didn’t pick up anything.

But what Shepard did glimpse had him finding a quick place to park the tank and open the door to see with his own eyes.

Every quarter mile marker had a small lighthouse at the sandy edge looking into the water, a string of lights trailing from one to the next, a fire pit and picnic bench at each site. Outside of the Hub, Shepard hadn’t seen something so...domestic or normal, as the campsites before him. A small shanty town could be seen just out in the distance, a tall makeshift fence keeping intruders out. No sign of raider gore or high end turrets, probably settlers, maybe even a trading post.

“Major Quantum! You romantic dork! What the hell is this?” Ashley shouted as she dismounted from the Nomad with a small earth shaking thud in her power armor.

“I found a romantic getaway for you and Krem!”

Shepard raised an eyebrow at his lover. “Major Quantum?”

“Didn’t Alenko tell you?” Scott waggled his eyebrows as he dug through their gear. “He’s got a rep.”

Kaidan gave him a sheepish look. “Aren’t many biotics in the wasteland. People are either in awe...or terrified. A lot of settlers have seen me drinking Nuka Cola or Nuka Quantum, you know, for the carbs? But they think it gives me superpowers.” Shepard remembered the shit Kaidan had to deal with as a human biotic before the war, but still. That they were superstitious enough to buy that shit? “Any way, I heard whispers about this place and looked up what information was stored on the Omni-Tool from before the fallout. It used to be a huge vacation spot, full of tourists from around the world. The current locals use it as a camping ground for travelers and traders, I think. The lighthouses are all different sizes, some will fit-”

  
Nicky growled and lowered herself into a fighting position.

Red dots popped up on Shepard’s hud as EDI alerted him to hostiles closing in. They all pulled a weapon as they got the same notice on their Omni-Tools and just as Shepard had his shotgun at the ready, something made the ground crumble and groan before exploding upwards in a shower of sand and dirt.

Something big.

The trained instinct to fire and destroy hostiles had them killing it with their combined fire before they could even see it in the moonlight and Shepard had the sinking feeling that came with a near miss. Another groan, another shower, but this time Kaidan used his biotics to attack, illuminating some sort of monstrous arachnid outline that had Shepard nearly gagging.

There was a displacement of air as something big swung by his face, but again, they killed the beast instantly together.

With a feeling of trepidation, Shepard ordered, “Switch to black light.”

They answered his command without hesitation, though he saw Kaidan toss a worried look his way. Unlike the average person afraid of arachnids for no reason other than the creepy crawly factor, Shepard had earned the fear growing up.

  
Which was why Jane had been in charge of killing spiders.

Sure enough, the black lights from their Omni-Tools lit up the corpses and they were all treated to the faded blue-green glow of ginormous-

“Radscorpions.”

Sick to his stomach, Shepard studied the creatures with tails as long as his body. And Shepard was nicknamed a short turian for good reason. “Fuck.”

Two red dots were still active in the area and as he extended the light, the living radscorpions not yet alerted to them revealed themselves, glowing much brighter than their dead brethren. Putting commands in his Omni-Tool, he had EDI scan the area for miles, searching, but these seemed to be the only ones left.

“Ok. Let’s eliminate the other two and clear the camp. Ryder and Drack, take the one at three o’clock. Team Milky Way go left.”

Ashley grinned like a wild thing at the old nickname. “Oorah!”

“Take their stingers,” Scott advised as they flanked the last two. “They’re great for caps. And their meat and eggs aren’t too bad in a pinch. With enough hot sauce.”

Kaidan sent a look over his shoulder at his lover as they advanced. “Sounds like someone I know.”

“You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“Nope. But don’t worry, I’ve gotten better at cooking. Good teacher.” The biotic put the radscorpion in stasis before it could dig itself underground, Ashley raising a rifle to fire as Drack used Blood Rage on the other.

“Not even with hot sauce.” He shuddered before finishing the kill with his shotgun. “I still have tatos left.”

“Tatos, huh?” Kaidan’s murmur was fond as he looked at him.

Shepard felt momentarily dumb and merely said. “Yeah. Great for tots.”

Kaidan smiled at him and squeezed his hand. The instinct was to freeze, so used to maintaining professionalism until they were away from the public eye...but there was no one left to cause them trouble for it. So he gave an answering squeeze and a peck on the cheek before turning back to the dead creatures, trying to fix on his commander persona.

“Ok. Great. We’ll take it all in for trading then. They’ll keep til morning, right?”

Scott snorts. “Everything keeps out here.”

“I vote we camp out in that one,” Kaidan pointed to a white lighthouse overlaid with a red cross, probably wide enough for two or three. “EDI can keep watch and I’ll cook breakfast in the morning.”

“Don’t suppose you have anything to fill a krogan?” Drack challenged.

Kaidan smirked in a way that made Shepard tingle. “Got some leftover deathclaw, just for you.”

The old krogan chuckled as he swung the radscorpions into a glowing pile and they all headed to the shoreline to make camp. Ash dug out a couple of bottles of booze, one with no label for Drack, and they all celebrated the reunion until the moon was high and their eyelids hung low, turning into their respective lighthouses.

Shepard and Kaidan stripped off enough body armor so that they could lay tucked around each other in the circular space inside their lighthouse. Boo found his place in Kaidan’s hair, Nicky in the small space between their bodies and as sleep tugged at them, the biotic spoke.

“Le Melin.”

Shepard’s eyes snapped open from where they were drifting shut, staring incredulously into Kaidan’s. Suddenly it occurred to him they never told him how long they’d been awake.

“Pedig edhellen?”

“You? What?” Shepard stuttered and then ventured a, “Nae?”

“Gellon ned I galar I chent lîn ned I gladhol.”

The words were ones he’d haltingly memorized just, to Shepard, a few months ago. And if memory served….

Shepard felt his ears burn as Kaidan smirked. “You learned elvish. You learned enough Sindarin, after I told you what a totally nerdy kid I was and whispered declarations to me as I fell asleep that night.”

The hunted look on Shepard’s face had Kaidan raising an eyebrow.

“Wait, was it more than one night?”

Looking at one another, they both started giggling and pressing closer to each other despite the dog. Until one was fighting not to cry and the other was laying kisses to keep them at bay.

“Losto vae,” Shepard whispered.

“Ollo vae,” Kaidan answered.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Le Melin-I love you

Pedig Edhellen- Do you speak Elvish?

Nae- Alas

Gellon Ned I Galar I Chent Lin Ned Gladhol-   
I love to see your eyes shine when you laugh

Losto Vae- Sleep Well

Ollo Vae- Sweet Dreams

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CHAP 5 NOW HAS ART!! I also have it up on my naughty blog shotceaftermidnight.tumblr.com
> 
> Sorry about the dense chap, lots of info to get through so we can continue onto FLUFF.
> 
> I found out about Laika the space dog while writing this, so Kaidan saved her. I feel as though the universal translators wouldn’t have nerd languages installed, so Shep and Kaidan both had to learn the old fashioned way.
> 
> Also, kudos to anyone who realized Kaidan was in fact the one Delan and Sam saw in chap 1. I may have been too subtle with that.
> 
> Thanks for reading guys!


	8. Big Iron

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Milky Way gets to be big damn heroes and the boys finally get some alone time.

“This is...quite the collection you have.” Jane did a slow spin in place to check out how the fancy-ass Captain’s Cabin had changed since she was first given a tour of the Normandy SR-2.

The once empty fish tank near the entrance now held a forest of different corals and kelp, a small city of castles housing aquatic life of all kinds from across the galaxy. The armory by the bed was stocked with all sorts of clothes and gear, none of them bearing the Cerberus insignia. A line of bottles containing various liquors and alcohol circled around the head of the large bed on the shelf lining the back wall of the cabin, the prominent group of whiskies within easy reach at one end. The glass display case overlooking the bedroom area from the desk was more than half way full of model ships, carefully articulated and painted.

The sight of her old N7 helmet on the side table by the couch was a surprise. It was dinged and singed, Bossy Bitch still scratched on the side in her brother’s messy scrawl next to J. Shepard and her Alliance ID number.

It made her pause and choke back the memories of spinning free in space.

Trying to reach John.

Seeing the gas leak from his helmet, his hands clawing uselessly at it, his legs kicking in panic as he fought to breathe.

Heart pounding at the memories, she only vaguely recalled her own struggles as air ejected out through her torn envirosuit, terror for having let her brother down for a second time.

Oh god.

Now she stared at him, alive, focused on reports he’d never cared for before she’d entered his cabin. Oh, she’d always been an honorary crew member, usually crashing with Liara in the past, but this? This had always been his space as the Commander.

“John?”

She climbed up the few steps and leaned against the case to get a better look at him hunched over the datapads, an open bottle of whiskey next to his elbow.

Not his usual brand.

Spying a photo frame in the corner, she studied it as it changed from image to image, looped on ones containing Kaidan Alenko and Ashley Williams.

Fuck. Of fucking course.

A squeak had her looking up to see a glass cage on a shelf by the bathroom door, a small rodent standing on its edge, tiny black eyes watching her curiously as it’s whiskers twitched.

“Wha-since when do you have a pet?” It was really cute, but since the batarian raid her brother had avoided keeping animals of any kind.

“Boo’s not a pet.” John snorted, sounding amused. “He can handle himself in a fight, too.”

“Really, John? Boo?” She came nose to nose with ‘Boo’ and realized he wasn’t a regular teddy bear hamster. “Is this a space hamster?”

“Mmm.”

Crossed with other species from Thessia, giant space hamsters were generally much larger with high intelligence and a long lifespan, but had been recently bred into ‘mini’ sizes for those wanting portable pets.

Needing some kind of reaction from the damned amoeba, she grabbed his whiskey and took a pull. Hmm. Smooth fire down to her belly. She recognized the feeling of the way the fumes tickled her nose.

“Mm. Good stuff. Not your typical brand, though. Didn’t Alenko favor this back on-“

John slammed his current report down and spun in the chair to glare at her.

Normally, no look her brother could give her would ever instill fear, the superpower of being an older sibling. Every dirty look her baby brat of a brother sent her way came off as petulant, despite his gargantuan size.

But her brother looked haggard. As pristine as his room was, another strange thing in and of itself, he looked a mess. His hair hadn’t been buzzed in a while, dark auburn sticking up in every direction. The stubble on his face was closer to a beard, casting shadows against his skin. Some sort of bandage peeked out from behind his tank top and hoodie, desperate in need of a change, and looking suspiciously a lot like a tattoo cover.

They were both cursed with fair skin, mostly the Irish from their mother’s side, but John’s looked translucent at the moment, the rings around his eyes had rings, each one darker than the last, making his bloodshot eyes burn the bright blue of a flame. Suddenly, that glare had a lot more power than it ever did.

“Get. Out.”

Jane let her smile stay, but felt it lose its power. “Get out of your cabin? Or off your ship, commander?”

“Out, Jane.”

Jane. She remembered being Janie. She remembered him being John Boy, even Johnny to some. They’d lost a lot in between Mindoir and the streets of Boston. Boston was her fault, she’d tried too hard to protect him and ended up making him a bigger target. Forced him to run to save himself, leave her behind. But this? Cerberus? Wasn’t her fault. They were surviving, fighting, things they’d been doing since their father died and their mother abandoned them.

They were fucking professional survivors at this stage.

Eyes burning, she managed to prevent tears from spilling, just barely. “We’ll get them back, John. They don’t understand yet, but Anderson will explain it now that their assignment on Horizon is up. Besides, who knows what’ll happen with the Omega 4 relay? They’ll be safer on the Citadel, getting ready for the invasion.” She let herself be distracted by Boo, giving him a little skritch.

Ashley was a great soldier and even better friend, she loved talking guns with John and Tennyson with Jane, but Kaidan was John’s tether, whether or not he was finally admitting it to himself.

When Anderson approached her with the manifesto for the Normandy SR-1, a final list of crew to be narrowed down, she’d insisted on Alenko. Powerful biotic, steadfast, medic, big sense of morality...but it was something about him, his personality that made her insist to Anderson that he be kept.

He’d reminded her of John, when they’d been kids. Saint Johnny, savior of lost animals and the Harvest Festival, finder of Aunt Aeryn’s frequently misplaced wedding ring. They’d both had to form hard shells, sharp words and deadly defenses to live through what they had...but John had had such a big heart, still bigger than hers in those days running with the Reds...

Being a Spectre and unofficial XO on John’s ship meant she could watch Alenko’s influence. While he’d mildly annoyed her, John would react to the biotic’s perspective with surprise, followed by genuine smiles and long discussions. Little by little, Johnny came back.

Jenkins, well, she’d called that one, but even as the First Human Spectre she’d only had so much sway. Keeping Williams had been John’s call when he was officially instated as the commander after Eden Prime.

“DAMMIT, John!” She wasn’t good at being ignored. “You need to pull your head out of your ass. This crew needs you!”

Turning in the chair, John leaned back as he cradled the whiskey bottle between his legs, but said nothing as he stared at her.

“This whole mission? We keep labeling it as a suicide run. I kept labeling it as that! But up until this week, you never bought into that shit! Retrofitting the ship, armoring the crew. Because you CARE. About this ship, the crew-“

“You think I stopped caring about my people, Jane?”

“You’re certainly acting like it! Letting Miranda-“

“Oh, it’s MIRANDA now?”

“Shut your cocksucking hole, you don’t know what you’re even saying, you damn pissed asshole! This crew is running itself, because it’s Commanding officer decided-“

Standing up in a explosion of motion, the chair flew behind John into the desk as he towered over her. “This crew is the best damn crew the galaxy has seen since the first Normandy, because I picked this crew, NOT that glowing eyed bastard. And after everything I’ve been through, I can take a few damn days off to mope and deal with shit for once! BECAUSE my crew is the best damn crew, they can manage a few days.”

Jane wasn’t a short woman. She was tall even by earth standards and built to fight. John had been taller than her by far since their teenage years, but always seemed to carry himself a tad shorter around her, lending to her big sister ego. Not now. Now he was ever the infamous Commander Shepard, a tiny turian, and it was like a stranger was looking back at her.

“Don’t die, John Boy,” her voice broke, the Big Sister mask gone. “If you die, you can’t see either of them again and Kaidan will have to attend another funeral.”

 

*~N7~*

 

The warm sunlight peering in through the lighthouse window brought Shepard to awareness, but it was the gentle opening of the door that woke him and caused Nicky to look up.

Ashley grinned brightly at the tight curl of them on the ground from the other side. “Hey, Skipper.”

Blinking against the grit in his eyes, he glanced down to see Kaidan still snuggled against him, face lax and quietly snoring as Nicky laid her head back down. “We overslept?”

Watching them, the smile on her face dimmed a bit. “We didn’t have a set time for breaking camp and it's been so long since you,” she took a breath. “Since you guys saw each other, I figured you’d want some more time. He’s been all torn up inside, wanting to drop everything to find you. Got a little over dramatic a couple of times, worried we wouldn’t find you until we were old and gray...or dead.” She snorted.

“How long? Has it been I mean? He never gave me an answer.”

Rolling her eyes, she answered. “To him it probably feels like forty years. I mean, we all missed you, Skip, but damn. Ten months? Jane was developing ulcer number three when she had to leave, but she knew if any of us could find you, it’d be me and K.”

Shepard squinted at her. “He lets you call him that?”

“Nope.”

Laughing felt good. “I missed you, chief.”

She waggled her eyebrows at him. “Obviously.” Patting her thigh, she gently called for Nicky and the husky reluctantly got up from her warm nest between the lovers, causing Kaidan to snort and start moving. “Townsfolk came down this morning to greet us and told us about their problems with the radscorpions. Scott and Drack left to go clear out the area and get some caps for the bodies. I also came across an ad about a town needing some help, shouldn’t be too far out of our way back to Meridian if you’re interested.”

“Mm. Sure, Ash.” Kaidan sleepily wrapped his arms around Shepard’s waist as the former commander sat up. “Thanks. We’ll be out in a bit.”

She winked at them. “Take your time. Boo’s hunting.”

Dazed, Shepard looked down at Kaidan as she firmly shut the door behind her. “Hunting?”

“Hmm? Yeah. He started running off to hunt after we left the Vault. Some kills are big enough he just leaves it for us.”

“Dare I ask how big these kills are?”

Kaidan’s rusty morning chuckle shot through Shepard as the biotic ran his hand through his hair. “The biggest kill was a radstag, I think. But he’s killed a lot of mole rats.”

“Fucking mole rats.”

Eyes twinkling, he asked. “Personal vendetta against them, John?”

Shepard felt his deadly glare was more of a pout. “Nearly bit my dick off when I first entered the wasteland.”

“Glad it didn’t.” The biotic murmured, eyelids lowering over dark eyes. “It’s definitely a favorite part of mine.”

Heart skipping, Shepard swallowed and leaned down to meet him in a kiss. Kaidan was ready for him, lips soft against his and hands going around his neck.

Then he made the mistake of opening his mouth and- yuck.

Laughing, Kaidan pulled away and rested his forehead against his.

“I said that out loud, didn’t I?”

“That you did.” Brown eyes fond, Kaidan traced a thumb along Shepard’s full bottom lip. “I missed you. Like a limb.”

Rubbing the tip of his nose back and forth against the biotic’s earned him a bright grin. “It killed me to think I was losing you. I think EDI and Garrus had to sedate me as soon as the feed cut out.”

“God, I’m sorry.”

“I know. I knew then, too. So. Ten months, huh?”

“Yeah.” A sigh, Kaidan tangling their fingers together.

“It’s only been a couple of weeks to me, but I understand if anything has changed. We-We never had much time together. Didn’t have a chance to discuss the future or us.”

“We weren’t sure we were going to have one. I hoped though. Prayed a little, too.” Kaidan pinned him with a look. “Did you. I mean. What was it that you wanted, John?”

Taking a deep breath, he stared at the man he’s pretty sure he’s been in love with since the Normandy SR-1 and tried to take his own advice to EDI, and be brave. “You, Kaidan.”

Biting his lip, Kaidan searched his face. “You have me.”

“I love you. I’ve loved you, for a long time, even before we met at Apollo’s. And I’ve ogled that damn ass of yours since we were introduced.” That earned a smirk. “I want a future with you, I just don’t know what kind that entails out here.”

“I love you, too, John. And out here? You can be whatever you want. Heroes are needed everywhere, but they’re anything from farmers to soldiers and leaders. Ash and I started working with the BoS and NCR to help people.” Kaidan raised an eyebrow. “And maybe even because of the included power armor and weapons.”

Shepard snorted. “Ash must have been beside herself.”

“No kidding. It’s also how we met Krem and the others, but Ash and I weren’t planning on spending long with them. Honestly, maybe even just up until finding you. So, what do you want?”

Was it really that simple? It couldn’t be. And yet there it was, offered in Kaidan’s gaze. “John. I just want to be John. No more wars. No more asshole diplomats. No more gang fights or military missions. A normal life.” He paused. “Maybe go hunting with Boo sometimes. Kill some mole rats and the occasional raider.”

It seemed like Kaidan already knew what he’d been going to say and nodded. “You got it. We help Garrus, you get your white picket fence. Or whatever passes for it in the wasteland.”

John smiled at him tentatively as their fingers tangled.

And hoped.

 

*~N7~*

 

“So.” Ashley thrust a handwritten wanted poster in their faces as they finished cleaning up breakfast by the campfire, Boo using her head as a lookout point. “Wanna make a pit stop, boys?”

Kaidan took the ad, and John read over his shoulder to see it was a nearby town named Silver Creek being hassled by a gang of marauders. The local sheriff had been killed and the settlement was offering up a meager reward to entice someone to help them out. Drack and Scott had taken the nomad, but promised to be back within the day. If they left the power armor, they’d still make good time.

“Sounds like a plan.” The last thing John wanted was to sit and wait around for those two to return.

As much as they tried to get Nicky to stay, the dog insisted on coming with them, so they got her better gear to wear and Boo found a new home in the oblivious husky’s pack. John snuck a picture, only to have Ash tease him and then ask for a copy. “You should see all the pictures I’ve taken of that damn hamster. We even got him armor once, but he kept taking it off. Think he fights better this way.”

“Maybe it was the wrong kind of gear,” John wondered.

Entering the town felt like a scene out of an old western movie, dust circling their boots with the sun in their eyes as heat waves rose from the ground. It was set up much the same, a small population with the biggest buildings lining the main street, original wood with stone and not like the usual shanty towns. Very few people were out and about. Small red mountains and hills cradled the area, with little vegetation and the local animals free and running amok.

John considered this was probably on purpose, harder for the marauders to steal the animals.

“Afternoon! Can I help you folks?” A compact, black man was exiting what looked like a hotel, his step wary and hands casually resting near the pistols at his hip.

Kaidan lifted the ad before John could take a breath. “Yeah. We were just in Port Havasu and saw this. Says you could use a hand?”

The man’s startling blue eyes still seemed cautious, but his grin was bright as Nicky ran forward and started dancing around him in excitement. “If you’re here to lend it, we welcome you.”

“John Shepard, formerly of the Alliance.” He reached out and shook the man’s hand. “Lancer-Knight Kaidan Alenko and Knight-Captain Ashley Williams, also formerly of the Alliance and attached as a liaison to the Brotherhood of Steel and NCR.”

“Oh, yeah?” The man nodded at the armor they wore. “Maxson’s or ...?”

“Hey, Quantum! Peacemaker! What are you doing out here in BFE?”

They all turned to see a young man, the equivalent of a human krogan, leaning against the entrance to the old hotel. Scars marked his face and bared skin, his smile wide and welcoming. Despite the many bandages covering him and the crutch he held, he leaned down to pet Nicky as the husky ran to him next, tail wagging madly.

Ashley grinned and put an elbow up on John’s shoulder, despite the reach. “We were out looking for this guy and saw a wanted ad. What the hell are YOU doing here, Vega? You starting fights you can’t finish again?”

“Ouch.” The man put a hand to his heart as he rose. “Why you always gotta do me like that, Williams?”

“Because you’ve got an MO.” Kaidan intercepted, rolling his eyes at John as they walked over. “Former NCR Ranger. Good guy, likes to help locals, but tends to bite off more than he can chew.”

“I heard that, Quantum.”

“You were meant to.”

“I think I like them,” the settler murmured, gesturing them inside away from the sun and where old fans were whirling away against the heat. They were in a parlor that looked like it had been set up as a triage unit, cots lined with injured settlers and an older man carrying a doctor’s bag moving back and forth between them as a radio played at the main desk. “Steve Cortez. I worked at the stables and was in charge of trade routes before we got hit by these assholes. James here strolled into town shortly after we started having problems, tried to help us out, but got taken down hard the last time they came through. We managed to convince Signa that he was dead so they’d stop looking for him.”

Snorting, Vega hobbled over to a small table by the front window. “I got some great intel if you wanna take them down.”

“And I can lend you the horses that haven’t been stolen and take you to where I found James, pretty sure I can point you in the right direction of their settlement.”

“Hell no, Esteban!”

“You think you’re going to take them?” Steve looked pointedly at the larger man’s injuries.

“It’s too dangerous.”

“I can more than handle myself, Mr Vega. I survived before you got here, didn’t I?”

Never before had John seen such a pair of puppy eyes on such an intimidating looking person. Excepting Grunt, of course. “Yeah. Doesn’t mean it’s any less dangerous, though. I don’t want you hurt, man.”

“If you draw us a map, we could probably find it without help,” Kaidan offered, but Steve was shaking his head.

“I grew up all over, working trade routes since I was a kid with my family. It’s not just about drawing a map, it’s the critter hotspots you need to avoid and scouts to look for. You need a guide. Especially since your best bet is to go at dusk. It’d take too long for me to write it all down.”

John looked at Kaidan, who nodded at him. “Ok. We appreciate it. What kind of information-“

He cut himself off as he heard a ruckus outside, Nicky pricking her ears and growling. John hugged the wall by the window to look outside. The few people that had been on the street were fleeing, doors and windows slamming shut as horses whinnied loudly and nervously from down a side street.

“EDI?”

“A moment...Riders are approaching from the northwest. Five in total, with a spare horse.”

The HUD in his eyepiece popped up and showed him the red dots marking the hostiles. It was further than the scan usually allowed for and he briefly wondered at the new reach, but wasn’t going to complain about it.

Steve grabbed Vega by a muscular shoulder and started urging him towards the back and up the stairs, then reached behind the front desk for a shotgun. “We have our own scouts. Kids we’ve been trying to keep from going after these bastards. They’re probably warning everyone. We’ll have a couple minutes before they’re here.”

“What kind of weapons are we talking?” Ashley asked as they all dropped their bags to arm themselves.

“Rifles and shotguns mostly. They have a super mutant that rides a Yao Guai, I don’t know if he’s with them, he has a sledgehammer. The leader is an asari. Signa. She likes to kill to make examples of people, takes food despite our low stores. Almost all our medical equipment is gone.”

A kid no older than fourteen ran in from the street, panting as he leaned against the front counter by the desk. “Five riders from the gang. Got the big guy with them.”

“Is the asari with them?” Kaidan asked.

The kid frowned, huffing. “The blue woman? Nah. Didn’t see her.”

“All right.” John clapped his hands together and tried to fight the dorky grin on his face. “Kaidan and I will meet them head on, Ash-“

“Take the back, you got it, Skipper.” She gave him a mock salute and took off, ducking into an alley to run along the backs of the buildings as the boys strolled out into the main street, shoulder to shoulder as the radio echoed after them.

  
“~It Was Twenty Past Eleven When They Rode Out In The Street,  
           Folks Were Watchin' From Their Windows,  
                 Everybody Held Their Breath,  
                      They Knew This Handsome Ranger Was About To Meet His Death.~”

 

The kid watched them from the window, messy blonde hair in all directions. “Who’s the dead meat?”

Steve watched the two men as they greeted the riders, eyes widening as Kaidan lit up with his biotics to throw the the marauders from their horses as soon as they became hostile. John started taking them out from the front with his rifle, Nicky drawing the charging super mutant’s eyes with vicious barks as Ashley came up from behind with frag grenades and her shotgun.

The sudden explosion of action panicked the horses and they started running in all directions.

“Stay here, Conrad. Make sure James stays out of trouble.”

“Sure thing, Steve,” the kid answered as he pressed against the window and a protest echoed down the stairs from the back.

Steve ventured out to track the horses down, keeping a sharp eye on the fight with his gun ready. The first horse came right to him, recognizing her owner and whinnied her protest. “I know, girl. I know.”

Another check on the fight revealed all the marauders were down and the Yao Guai was snarling, bright blue as it hovered above the ground and legs swinging as Ashley finished it off with her shotgun.

“Damn,” Steve whispered.

There were more in the gang, Signa easily the strongest, but the fight had taken less than ten minutes with no casualties or injuries of their own.

Managing to find all the other animals, some already by the stables, he tethered them and made sure they had water before hurrying to check on the visitors. The bodies had been lined up and looted, a despicable but necessary thing in the wastes. He could see Mayweather clutching the gun that had been her husband’s, stolen from him while he was dying in the dust during one of the raids.

Old Boondock was talking to Ashley over the Yao Guai, probably talking about his favorite recipes he was planning to cook for them with the meat. The boys-

Were standing off to the side in the shade, talking quietly as they tried on the looted cowboy hats until Shepard leaned down to steal a quick kiss, making Kaidan smile brightly at him and answer with another, softer kiss.

It was sweet and made his heart ache for similar stolen moments with his late husband.

“Yeah, imagine being stuck on an active warship with them for a year and a half before they finally got together.”

Startling, Steve turned to a smirking Ashley. “Seems to me like you kept your sanity, regardless.”

The smile she answered with was vicious. “Only after I hacked the laundry bot to give Kaidan smaller BDU pants.”

Laughing, Steve looked back at the couple, lost in their own world for only a moment, before they turned as one to motion towards the bodies on the ground. “Well, it worked.”

“The whole galaxy was on the edge of being destroyed. There was no way we weren’t getting those two idiots together. Everyone was in on it.” She looked towards the hotel, where James Vega was hurrying towards them on his crutch, Conrad only giving mild protest behind him. “But you shouldn’t wait for the world to end to tell someone how you feel.”

“Yeah, I know.” He knew that better than most and made a quiet promise to himself as he went back to properly deal with the horses.

 

~*N7*~

  
When Knightingale had trotted back to Silver Creek without the former Ranger last week, Steve felt his heart sink in a way it hadn’t since his husband ran interference on a family of deathclaws. James Vega had been visiting their town for months, helping out where he could and looking for reasons to stick around. He’d been a great friend and Steve couldn’t help but notice the lingering touches and wistful looks.

It hadn’t taken the horsemaster long to hitch a fresh horse and ride out looking for him, following the trail until it was nothing but rocks and canyon, calling out in a panic against his own better judgement when Knightingale just whickered and side stepped nervously. James had been coherent enough to shout back and Steve found him in the exact spot they all were now.

There was even still blood scattered on the ground with the gear they hadn’t deemed important enough to weigh the horses down with.

“What was he doing out here?”

Sighing away the memories, Steve rolled his eyes at Ashley. “Being an idiot. Signa had just paid us another visit, this time taking all of our medical supplies. He promised he was just going to do reconnaissance, follow them back to camp, but he rode right into a group of bark scorpions.”

“Bark scorpions are smaller than radscorpions, but their venom is deadlier. They also have paler exoskeletons, allowing them to blend in better with the desert landscape.”

“Thanks, EDI,” John replied to the feminine voice on his Omni-Tool.

“He would have been fine, but the shots he fired to kill the scorpions grabbed the attention of a nest of cazadores.” Steve paused and waited, EDI didn’t disappoint.

“Cazadores are a mutated insect from giant tarantula hawk spider wasps. They have a distinct black-blue carapace and orange wings with red eyes and spines along their backs. Their sting is immediately deadly to most and they often hunt in groups of four or more.”

“Fascinating,” Steve murmured. “Can you scope out the area for the camp?”

A holographic map of the immediate area popped up for them all to see, featuring one of the canyons nearby with a smattering of neutral dots, probably hostiles that didn’t know they were there yet. One by one, more dots popped up, most of them in groups.

Studying it for a moment, Steve started asking EDI questions about things like temperatures, soil, local vegetation and structure. “Ok, mark this as cazador territory and that cave probably has Yao Guai. Mantis usually like Xander root, so mark that. Geckos will hang out by water, so mark that annnnnd there! That’s probably the heart of the camp. They’d be trapped in the canyon if anything happened, but it's easily defensible for them. Unless you have a really good sniper with a proper scope?”

Ashley hefted a gun easily as long as she was tall, her sharp smile bright in the fading twilight. “Garrus and I never did have that contest. Trust me, Skip. It’ll be like shooting fish in a barrel.”

“All right.” John turned to Kaidan and grinned like a little boy. Normally it wouldn’t have instilled much confidence in Steve, but he’d seen them in action just a few hours ago. “Ready, babe?”

“Babe?” A bushy eyebrow rose in mild protest.

“What? No? You let Ash call you K.”

“I don’t let Ash do anything. But, yeah, we can try it out. Babe.”

John’s nose wrinkled. “Hmm, yeah, not so sure anymore. Ok, ready EDI?”

“Yes, Commander.”

Suddenly, it was like a curtain fell and John turned into Commander Shepard, the legend that had helped end the Reaper War. Bright blue eyes zeroed in on Steve and he barely kept from standing at attention. “I want you to stay here with the horses. I’ll leave a transmitter with you so you can listen in. Your priority is to keep yourself and the horses safe, in that order. If things go sideways, EDI will pass along instructions. Should be a milk run, though. Got it?”

“Yes, sir.” A milk run? These were the worst raiders Steve had ever dealt with, he’d rather go against a deathclaw! Well, maybe a young one.

The three of them hustled on out of there, staying silent as they got into position and Steve restlessly moved the horses near a small stream with only mild radiation under a small overhang of rock. Feeding the animals some Rad-X to prevent rad poisoning, he listened attentively when the silence broke-

“Why don’t you ever Lift me like that, babe?”

“Any time you wanna try anything new, you just let me know, Johnny.”

“Huh. Yeah, ok.”

“Is that a trough of severed heads? Why don’t you ever take me anywhere nice?”

“Hey now! Noveria had it’s charm! And Virmire was gorgeous.”

“Unless you have a small army gunning for you.”

-as Kaidan and John started the frontal assault, battle flirting, and not giving any hints of their third party member.

It took Steve a while as he stood alert for any critters nearing the water, but then he realized the quiet comments like “EDI, three fifteen” were positions for the AI to mark targets for Ashley. It was better than listening to any show on Radio New Vegas.

Hot damn.

“Oh, someone’s looking a little blue. Think she’s upset?”

“That’s...kinda racist.”

“I meant the biotics, Kaid!”

Kaidan’s rusty laugh implied he knew exactly what his lover meant. “You can only call me that if I can call you John Boy.”

A loud crash. “How did you-NO. Do not ever call me that. Ever.” Steve could feel the following explosion over the com under his feet. “Those are the words of the devil!”

“Ever notice how dramatic one twin gets when you mention the other?” Ashley asked as she joined them. Must have left her cover. Or was the fight over already?

“Yeah. I have-“

“Ok, Steve! Bring them on in! Hostiles are down and we have PLENTY of loot to carry back.”

Laughing, Steve rounded up the horses and guided them with EDI’s help. They passed a small garden with a few mantis already dead. He collected the mantis eggs left behind and the roots and veggies, before continuing on to the camp.

It was a mess, but in an organized way that he could almost see how it all played out. Ashley was already down from her high perch, methodically looting the bodies and gear with John, while Kaidan went through the stores and medical equipment in the back where the little shanty houses were set up.

Signa, the living nightmare they’d all suffered for over a year, lay off to the side like an afterthought, a single gunshot to the head. The entire fight had taken under forty minutes.

Damn.

It took all the horses and their own backs to carry all the loot and supplies. A lot of the items were from Silver Creek, but there was much more from the surrounding settlements. Steve planned on putting out a notice about Signa and her people, that Silver Creek would share what they could.

The journey back was on foot and long, by the time they arrived, it was just before the sun rose and they were covered in sand and grime. While the rest of them dropped off the basic supplies to the general store and bar, Kaidan carried the medical supplies to the hotel to help administer what was needed and was greeted by an overly excited Nicky who had been guarding the town with James in their absence.

With an idea blooming in his mind, Steve turned to Ashley.

 

~*N7*~

 

“Wow.” Kaidan felt a familiar hand on his hip as he and John took in the view.

The top of the hotel was once a blown out mess and had been converted into a bathing area, the height of the building allowing for privacy. The new floor was tilted just so, leading water runoff to slide naturally into the small garden lining one side of the ‘roof’. Piping was fed up one side of the building to a small row of showers, and then continued on to a pair of bathtubs near the garden area.

Steve had explained to them that it was Vega who had built the plumbing system, wanting the people of Silver Creek to experience running water like in the major settlements. Some locals had come up with the roof garden and string lights, even a small patio area looking off into the desert.

They’d been gestured through the door with a wink from their host, a bottle of liquor and a promise they had the place to themselves for as long as they needed it. As soon as the door shut behind them, Kaidan felt the hand on his waist tighten and guide him into a hug. He happily returned it, until he couldn’t ignore the smell anymore.

Noses scrunched and laughing, they broke apart with lingering kisses and made for the showers. John disrobed quickly and efficiently, weapon nearby as always, and put his Vault suit into a small washing tub at one end of the showers. Filling the tub with water and adding some Abraxo to clean their things with later, he turned to see Kaidan paused in his own disrobing.

“What is it?”

The biotic looked almost as though he was bashful, hands hovering over the opening of his BoS flight suit. “Um.”

John walked over, naked as the day he was born, noting the discarded boots and armor, and grabbed what could be washed and threw it into the next washing tub and repeated the process. Looking over his shoulder again, he could see Kaidan eyeing him appreciatively, but hands still hesitant on his zipper.

“Kaidan?” Oh, yeah. That was definitely a blush. Hmm.

Trying not to feel so eager, John wandered back over to his lover, hand tentatively over the other man’s. “Need help there, babe?”

Kaidan closed his eyes and blew out a breath before opening them again, this time he had a self-disappreciating grin on. “Been awhile, huh John?”

“Yep.” He smiled softly, trying not to crowd too close. “Feels like a lifetime, even though it was only a few weeks for me. If you want, we can slow-“

Lips against his stopped the thought from escaping him and he moaned, leaning into it, arms coming up around the biotic. “No, that’s, that’s not it. Not for me.”

“Ok,” he murmured against Kaidan’s mouth. “What is it?”

The man shifted in his arms, taking another breath and then the sound of a zipper echoed between them, hitting parts of John like lightning. The man was only a tease when he didn’t mean to be.

“I’m just. We never talked about it, but, I thought it was pretty obvious that I used to, well.”

“Used to?”

Kaidan cleared his throat and let the suit fall, letting the stench of battle release and his body be revealed. Confused, John rubbed at his tense shoulders and looked down.

“Mmm.” It was hummed out of appreciation, rather than acknowledgement.

Yes, they both stank, and yes there were some new scars that weren’t healed with medi-gel. Which he was totally going to ask details for later, but...

“Kaidan?”

“Yeah?”

“Is this worry about the fact you haven’t manscaped in a while?”

The beautiful olive skin in front of him flushed deep red and oh, how it traveled. With the sun coming up and the light from the lanterns, he could eagerly follow it with his eyes.

“Uh, yeah?”

Chuckling, John kissed him deeply, before pulling away again to wrinkle his nose. “Shower first.”

“Agreed.” Oooo, John loved it when Kaidan’s voice got husky.

They tossed the suit in with the rest of the dirty clothes, and got under the spray. John didn’t even think to get frisky, the water felt so good. He’d been doing army washes since he left the vault, always on the lookout for another mole rat incident. The water was warmer than he thought it would be, but it’d been sitting in metal pipes and probably would get cold soon.

They grabbed soap out of a hanging basket along with one of the rags provided and started to clean themselves quickly as the water lost its warmth. Then they made their way over to the tubs, only to see a small fire with a couple large tea kettles just coming to boil.

“Fuck, yes!” Excited, John darted forward to grab one of the kettles as Kaidan started filling a tub with treated lake water. They didn’t need to fill the tub high, planning to soak together, which meant the second kettle gave them a nice toasty temperature. Sliding in had them both moaning as they shifted around to find a position that worked for them.

“When’s the last time you had a hot bath?” John wondered, trailing his hand along Kaidan’s flank.

“Mmm. Hot water was in another Vault in California. Bath? Probably your apartment on the Citadel.”

Ooo, the memories of that hot tub.

Feeling his lover’s body against his, John pulled him closer and kissed him. They were both content like that, knees and legs finding places to rest as they bobbed in the water, soft kisses and curious hands as the sun rose and turned the sky deep pink, blue and gold. As the water cooled, and the light morning breeze chilled their wet skin, they started sliding against each other.

Kaidan lifted a leg to the edge of the tub, hauling John closer by that cute butt he was so damn proud of, leaving his lover to gasp his name. One of John’s arms cradled the biotic’s head, saving him the discomfort of the tub’s edge, while the other curled around the raised thigh to find a better-

“Aht-ha! Mm. Yes, that’s better.”

“God I missed this.”

Lift off! Their cocks found each other, first John’s going under Kaidan’s heavy balls, the sensitive mushroom head eagerly teasing the ring of muscle there, causing the biotic’s toes to curl out of the corner of his eye. Water sloshed as his hips rose to meet John’s and his cock lost it’s place in their eagerness and instead became trapped with Kaidan’s between their bellies.

Kaidan may have been embarrassed by his body hair, but John didn’t think it was that much of a huge difference. He’d certainly seen worse and the other man was far from a bear. With his copper skin, it was actually quite the pretty picture, though he wasn’t sure what it would be like to go down on him with that full bush. Maybe he could offer to help him with it later?

Ooo, hmm. That might be a new kink.

“John! Yeah. Just like that.”

  
“Perfect. As always, K.”

Damn, he’d missed those noises. Kissing his lover, he carefully spread his knees and tried to brace his feet against the end of the tub. Not hard to do considering how tall they both were. Carefully, he slotted their cocks together and started thrusting.

The kisses had to stop for fear of injury and their eyes met, Kaidan trusting John to keep his grip so he could raise his hands to his lover’s face and cup it. It was easily one of the most intense moments John had ever shared with another person, breaths punching and hearts racing together as their escapades kept the garden well watered.

“John.” God, Kaidan looked so vulnerable. It was so hot and so terrifying all at once. Usually he was the one taking charge in bed, making sure the commander could have his rest, but now it felt like a role reversal.

“Tul, meleth.” John stilled to sneak a couple kisses before slowly building to a frantic pace, cocks sliding and balls rubbing. “Tul-an nin.”

And then he had the absolute pleasure of watching Kaidan come from inches away, breath hitching and hips lifting until John felt them both rising out of the water and FUCK, sometimes John forgot how strong he was even without his biotics and that alone could push him over the edge...but then they were both flickering with static blue, the dark energy tickling and zapping at their sensitive skin until John’s orgasm was pulled from him.

They didn’t even notice when they fell back into the tub, Kaidan’s head barely missing the edge, limbs slipping and sliding until their faces were barely above water and their legs were over the side and in the air.

As soon as they had enough breath back, they were both laughing hysterically.

“How about we get out, rinse off again real quick?”

“Always with the good ideas, Johnny.”

John gave his nose a peck and carefully climbed out, then turned to help Kaidan out. Soon they were rinsed off, their cleaned clothes drying on a rack by the wash tubs and wrapped up in what passed for towels on the makeshift patio together, passing the liquor back and forth between them. A radio sat on a small wooden table, and they turned it on low to add to the atmosphere.

“~I’m Tickled Pink,  
       The Moon Is Yellow,  
            And I’m Your Fellow Tonight.~”

Kaidan stared at his hand, grasped in John’s and held against his lover’s chest near his heartbeat. Tilting his head away from John’s shoulder to meet his eyes, he asked a question that had been pestering him for over a year.

“When we were losing the signal over London, you were trying to tell me something. You kept pointing to yourself. It seemed important to you.”

Along his side, he felt John tense and then those bright eyes were looking down at him, gold with the light of the rising sun, and he repeated the words he’d struggled to get out all those many years ago. About his True North, about being scared to tell him. Kaidan’s eyes widened, becoming damp and stared at the compass tattoo as he spoke, tracing it with his free hand.

“I hate to admit it, but Jane was right. I was in love with you before Horizon. Probably even Ilos. Being your friend, reminded me of who I was and not who I had to be. I admired your strength.” John smirked at him. “Your integrity.”

Just for that comment, Kaidan’s next kiss had bite to it, causing his lover to shift uncomfortably, despite the recent orgasm.

“Then, I guess, I have a confession to make.”

“Oh?” That may have sounded too hopeful.

“I don’t fall in love as easily as some people, John.” Kaidan looked into the sunrise as it escaped the mountains, watched as bats returned home for the day and birds woke to hunt breakfast. “And sex? I’ve tried it casually, with girlfriends I’d only been with for a short while, the short time I was together with Ty. It was ok, I could never really get into it like them, but I loved making my partners feel good, you know?”

“Sure.”

“A friend called it demisexuality.” Idly, he played with their joined fingers before looking up into those bright eyes again. “It takes me awhile to get there, but when I do, I’m so tangled up in that person, so in love, I don’t ever want to leave.”

“And...the sex?”

Kaidan kissed John’s hand in his as concern started to shade his face. “And the sex is better than it ever has been with anyone else. What I feel for you? Never felt anything like it before. You were my friend first, possibly my best friend.”

“Don’t let Ash hear you say that.”

Kaidan pinched and tickled him in retaliation until he held his hands up in surrender. “She gets it. So does Garrus and the others.”

“Mm.” John rested his head on top of Kaidan’s, sunlight lighting up his closed eyelids as he fought not to think about the world off of this rooftop. “Same. All the warm bodies and relationships. None of them felt like this.”

“Like what?” Kaidan asked, almost hesitant.

“Bar, nin estel.”

 

 

Tul, meleth~ Come, love.  
Tul-an nin~ Come for me  
Bar, estel nin~ Home, my hope

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You see those damn tubs everywhere in FO4, I really just wanted them fooling around in one. 
> 
> That aside, I loved writing them with the New Vegas feel.


	9. Easy Living

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Kaidan didn’t always see eye to eye, but many years later, they do more than that in Meridian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, many thanks to ElleBee and Humbles for the beta work!!

”Of all names, why Normandy?” Garrus liked to use the battlefield for their Getting To Know You conversations. And honestly? It was refreshing in comparison to the awkward and forced conversations Shepard would start ship-side, even though it was important to know who you’re trusting your backside with.

Shepard grunted when mortar exploded towards his bare face as bullets hit the building wall beside him. “I imagine it’s named after one of the greatest battles on earth.”

“Hmm.” The turian changed his position, adjusting his sniper rifle and started taking down the geth shock troopers trying to flank Tali as she hacked a console for the bulkhead door. “Tell me more. I’m curious about human tactics.”

Seeing a geth destroyer heading for Alenko, he immediately sniped it in the head twice. The biotic spared a half glance for the falling synthetic, before turning back to his own hacking job to help the quarian. “World War Two on earth, Garrus. Some asshole managed to rise to power and form this huge, bigoted army. They tried taking over more and more of the world, committing genocide and the worst kind of evils you can inflict on a person as he went. No one-”

More headshots, but the need for them was waning as the worst of the fight died down. “No one wanted to join that war until it came for them. In a couple of years, though, almost the entire planet was involved. Normandy was where they launched the largest amphibious invasion earth has ever seen, and because of it, turned the tide of the war.”

“And the asshole in power?”

“Coward shot himself before the people could capture him and demand retribution.”

“Hmm. So the ship is named after the land this battle was won?”

“Probably. It was only one of many, many battles it took to win that war, but it was definitely one that counted towards our victory. And the fact that it was the allied forces was probably meant to be symbolic.”

“Cute. I don’t think Presley and the others care much, however.”

Shepard gave a toothy grin to the turian, knowing of the racism still lingering on his ship. “He will. Or I’m throwing him out the airlock.”

“It makes me all kinds of tingly when you get protective like that.”

He winked at the amused turian, turning together with him to keep an eye out on the ground below their perch for stragglers. “Gotta protect my ass-ets.”

“You humans and your strange fixation with fleshy bits.”

“Now, Garrus, that’s stereotyping. Better not let Presley hear you say such things. Besides, don’t think I haven’t noticed you appreciating the fleshy bits of certain crew members.”

“You’re one to talk.” Garrus tilted his head at their teammates below. “How IS your relationship with the Lieutenant improving?”

“Alenko?” Shepard scratched at his jaw and peeked through his scope to see how things were progressing. “The man is infuriating.”

“And yet, you respect him.”

“He’s a strong L2 trained in battlefield medicine and a good marine.” Shepard paused and then decided to say Fuck It to professionalism. “I just want to punch him sometimes.”

“Especially when he’s trying to save your life?”

“It was barely a flesh wound!! We had priorities other than kissing booboos!”

“Is that what humans call sexual encounters?”

God fucking damn it! Shepard felt his cheeks burn a bit. “Maybe some sad, strange and lonely people, Garrus. No. I get it. He’s a good guy and I’m glad he’s on our team.”

“Then?”

“He’s goddamn stubborn and challenges me all the time!”

“And yet,” Garrus murmured. “You haven’t threatened to kick his ‘ass-ets’ off of the ship.”

The scope zoomed in on Alenko as the area was confirmed free of hostiles and Shepard grinned. “Sometimes it’s helpful to have certain inspirations keep you company at night, Vakarian.”

“Must be nice, having that cabin all to yourself.”

“Anytime you get sick of calibrating your cannon by yourself, you can come find out.”

He could see the invitation startle the turian as Tali and Kaidan called out their success and the snipers switched their loadout for hurrying down to meet them: Garrus his assault rifle and Shepard his shotgun.

“I wasn’t aware humans were so open to relations with other xenos.”

Snorting, Shepard checked in with T’Soni’s position inside before speaking. “Humans have many different types of sexualities, my friend. Me, personally? I don’t care what’s in your pants as long as you’re up for some fun.”

“As tempting as your offer is, I’ll have to decline. But if there ever was a human I’d be tempted with...”

“You’re breaking my heart, Vakarian. I’ll always wonder what could have been.”

“Mm. Maybe not your heart, Shepard. And somehow, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed for long.”

“You boys bored?” Tali stood with her hands on her hips, body language more than making up for her hidden facial expressions. “Because next time you can hack the doors and we’ll cover your asses.”

“Perhaps, but then we’d miss out on the view.”

Alenko raised an irritated eyebrow as Tali smacked Garrus for the comment, despite their difference in height. God, the man knew how to use those bushy caterpillars of his. T’Soni watched them curiously as the door opened, and while the scientist was young for an asari, how was she so naive when she was so much older than all of them?

“Ok, kids. Let’s go meet up with Gunny before she steals all the fun.”

“Somehow, commander, I think she’ll be fine saving the party for herself.” Once in a while, Alenko surprised him. Then again, he’d formed a strange and immediate relationship with Williams sometime while Shepard was in a coma post mission on Eden Prime.

Snorting his agreement, the commander led the way through the bulkhead doors. “Just make sure when we get ship-side again you talk up today, really make Wrex feel liked he missed the battle of the century.”

“With pleasure, Shepard,” Tali trilled gleefully. “A krogan downed by a small army of hungry pyjak. I don’t know how Dr. Chakwas managed to keep him in the med bay.”

“Chakwas is a different kind of badass, Tali.”

“Yeah, Shepard.” Alenko glanced at him, lips twisting as he fought a smirk. “She manages to keep you in line.”

The comeback fizzled before leaving Shepard’s mouth as he realized it was the first time the biotic had informally addressed him.

“Nope,” Garrus leaned close to his temporarily speechless human friend. “Not long at all.”

“Can it, Vakarian.”

*~N7~*

Later that morning found most of them at Silver Creek’s watering hole, a little saloon-like restaurant cozied up next to the general store and the trading post tent. John and Kaidan had taken a nap together in a room Steve provided at the hotel, until the heat from the rising sun pushed them apart and woke them. Now, they were sitting in a small booth in the back, away from the sun coming in through the windows and enjoying a late breakfast of gecko steak and deathclaw eggs that had been saved for a special occasion.

And tato tots thanks to Kaidan knowing how to make them, another reason to love the guy. Good old Boondock gave them some great recipes like mole rat stew to take with them alongside rations of the Yao Guai meat he’d set aside for them from the fight.

Legs tangled under the table next to Nicky, they talked about Steve and James as they waited for Ashley to get back from contacting Ryder. Boo sat on John’s wrist above his Omni-Tool implants, eating a tato tot and Kaidan had to take a snapshot of it for the collection he and Ashley had been building for the former commander.

“So was it Vega that started it?”

“Kinda? There were some kids in New Vegas who were a little dazzled by the biotics and wondered if I got my ‘superpowers’ from Nuka Cola.” Kaidan’s chuckle was still a bit hoarse with sleep and it made John grin all the wider. “He saw me drinking Quantum a couple times and it just stuck.”

Wrinkling his nose, John sipped at his black coffee. “I don’t know how anyone besides biotics could have a taste for that crap with all the calories and shit they add to it.”

“It IS kinda disturbing it wasn’t retailed for biotics until after it was already popular with college students and gamers. Hey, we should get you to try some Sunset Sarsaparilla before we head east. Can make some good stuff with it, too.”

“Everything even mildly edible in the wasteland seems to have a dozen recipes for it.”

“People had to get creative with the lack of options, I guess.”

“No kidding.” John peered into his mug. “Do I even want to know what’s in this coffee? I haven’t felt so jazzed since my blood was eighty percent caffeine on the Normandy.”

“Uhh, I think they add honey mesquite and coyote tobacco. Boondock brews it pretty thick.”

“Ugh. Disgusting and still very addictive. Probably a good thing I won’t be drinking it again anytime soon, right?” Boo finished the tot and scurried over to the remnants of John’s steak he hadn’t finished, Kaidan’s picked clean as usual. Nicky peeked over the edge of the table, eyes begging as she saw her new friend getting the goods and whined. The space hamster paused, nose twitching, and then scampered over with some scraps for her, much to John’s disbelief and delight.

“All right you guys! I got us a ride back to Meridian! Drack and Ryder are going to meet us there with our power armor.” Ashley came swinging in through the front door, Brahmin Wellington half finished in her hand. John had been a steak eater before the fallout, but he’d never spent time with cows. He can’t see himself eating Brahmin, everything else was fair game though.

“Oh yeah?” Kaidan smirked up at her. “And what’s the transport?”

Immediately her eyes went to John as she became a touch shy. “That would be a vertibird.”

“Not the BoS, I take it. Do I finally get to meet the infamous boyfriend?”

The answer was yes.

Gear packed and Nicky making the last rounds, the vertibird arrived by eleven hundred, landing just outside of town. A woman with road goggles jumped out, hair perfectly braided on top of her head, offered her hand to John and the name “Maryden” before turning to help them with their gear. There wasn’t much, but the settlers had gifted them with a lot of food and supplies.

With the bird on standby, the pilot emerged next, pulling off his helmet to grin at them. “Someone call for a ride?”

Though only a bit taller than Ashley, the man had well muscled arms that easily caught her as she jumped at him, swinging them both around before kissing her. Trying to give them a moment of privacy, John awkwardly studied the bull painted on the side of the aircraft.

“Hey Krem!” Kaidan had no such compunctions, striding forward to shake the man’s hand as he set Ashley down. “It’s good to see you. Just you troublemakers today?”

Laughing, the man took his hand and snuck in a small hug. “More than enough, isn’t it? The chief was needed in the Arizona territories. Pavus and Trevelyan ran into a whole settlement of Venatori.”

“Venatori?” John asked, but EDI had no answer.

Krem grinned boyishly at him and he found himself charmed. Kaidan’s amused expression was a dead giveaway that he’d noticed. “Group of raiders that think they’re actually too fancy to be raiders. They don’t actually need Bull’s help, but the boss is protective, especially since more than a few of them are biotic. And you must be the infamous John Shepard! It’s great to finally meet you and see if the legends are true.”

Putting on his own charming smile, John shook his hand. “Depends on which legends they’ve been filling your head with.”

“Less of the ones you think and more of the ones involving you being naked or head butting krogan.”

Laughing delightedly, Shepard offered, “Or both.” This was why he loved his crew.

Kaidan crossed his arms and stared at him. “Sounds like a gem you haven’t shared yet.”

“I’ll make a deal with you, I’ll tell you mine if you tell me about the vorcha mafia.”

The biotic narrowed his eyes in a very delicious manner. “We’ll see.”

“Hmm, we will.” John turned back to Krem. “Thanks for doing this.”

“It’s no problem. Maryden hasn’t seen her girlfriend in a while and I’m due back to finish a procedure.”

Kaidan’s eyebrows flew up in delight. “The doc said he had time?”

Krem shrugged and beamed at them. “He made time. I think the fact that he’s dating someone now gives the old man a little more energy.”

“Good for Harry,” the biotic murmured.

“And done! Let’s go boys!” Maryden yelled before climbing into the vertibird‘s cockpit.

The easy conversation continued on their way to Meridian as if they’d always been friends, Krem speaking about being trans in the wasteland and Maryden about her girlfriend, Jill, and their adventures with her best friend, Gil. John was going to make so many jokes. Ashley shared her story of walking into Steve outside of James’ room the previous night, the man carrying supplies for a sponge bath and winking at her when he was caught out. Kaidan cheered and explained to John about the bet that had been going on in Silver Creek about the two of them.

“If only we’d had time to join in, eh Ash?”

“We would have taken them for everything when we won.”

There were only two seats in the back behind the miniguns hanging out the sides, so Kaidan playfully sat on John’s lap after they latched Nicky’s harness to the ring in the floor so she could watch out the open door safely. It was something he used to judge other couples for, but now made his heart ache with fondness as they shifted for comfort. The miles passed quickly below their shadow: desert to farmland, farmland to the green vegetation smack dab in the middle of nowhere, like a bullseye for Meridian. They made good time and were circling the area within two hours.

Hard to believe just a couple days ago, he was worried he’d never see Kaidan or the others again.

They started to hover as Krem radioed into their hub and John eyed the very small clearing closely, so he wasn’t surprised when the ground parted and they carefully descended.

What did surprise him was the sheer scale of Meridian. While his Omni-Tool blipped out the small town above ground, it didn’t reveal the miles underground until they were hovering above the landing pad.

Miles and miles of cavern, lit by construction lamps and phosphorescent plant life. Housing, factories, farmland. There was even landscaping and birds. It was immense and all free from radiation.

Ryder was waiting for them with a smirk as Krem and Maryden powered down the bird. John nudged Kaidan to unhook Nicky and sure enough, there she went, charging at the kid. He wiped the grin off of his face as she bowled him over while Boo jumped out of her pack to play in his hair.

Ashley was downright cackling as she climbed down and started dragging off supplies. “I’ll have to remember that. Hey Ryder! Hey Jill, Gil! Macen!”

As Kaidan followed her and John willed feeling back into his legs, he studied the group greeting them. He recognized Gil, and the woman running over to greet Maryden must have been Jill. The name Macen was one that the turian Avitus had mentioned when he was last here, so he knew the turian was one of authority.

The woman jumping on a grinning Maryden confirmed herself to be Jill as they shared a passionate kiss against the vertibird...and actually fell over into the back as Gil laughed at them.

“Hey, Ryder! You got my bike still?”

“Nah,” Gil strode over to shake John’s hand and do some sort of fancy handshake with Kaidan. “I’ve got her in my shop. Gorgeous lady you have there. And you did a great job attaching the side car, I’m sure materials were scarce as hell. Ducati Fusions are a rare find out there, especially a limited edition Lone Wanderer.”

Grinning widely at the other man, John felt Kaidan’s curiosity. “Still in one piece, I hope?”

“Eh...”

“Oh, he couldn’t keep his hands off of it. He gave it the full spa treatment and tuned her up. Even added some mods. Wait til you see it!” Ryder sidled in close as Gil rubbed at the back of his neck and tried not to blush.

“Hope you don’t mind?”

John smiled widely. “Didn’t have much time to get too attached to any one part of it before leaving it in your capable hands. Thanks, it means a lot. As long as it seats two...” He looked over to catch his lover’s glance, but Nicky woofed at them. “And the dog.”

“Hell,” Krem interrupted them. “You can probably even fit it right in the bird if you want.”

“What?”

Kaidan laughed and threw an arm around John. “Krem is going to be laid up a few days while Maryden and Jill have some time together. He said we can take it to your Vault to pick up Garrus.”

The turian came forward, nodding at them. “That’s where I come in. I’m Pathfinder Macen.”

“Pathfinder. That means you’re one of the heads of this organization?”

“Yup. I’m in charge of the turians we have on site. Most are still in their cryotubes until the dextro crops start producing enough to wake them and the quarians.”

“How many do you have down here?”

“Roughly forty six hundred.”

John stared. “Of just turians and quarians?”

The turian’s mandibles spread in a grin. “Just turians.”

“What. That’s incredible! How many did you have before the arks were attacked?”

“Wellllll,” Scott bounced in place.

Kaidan leaned in close to John. “The arks were a diversion, apparently. All colonists with the Andromeda Initiative were accounted for and tucked away when the Reapers blew. Whoever The Benefactor is that ran it all knew about the threat before any of us did and was building this place before we even set foot on Eden Prime.”

“How is that even possible?”

Scott shrugged. “The pathfinders are still digging and trying to get any info we can on them, but they hid themselves well and for all we know? They were never even down here with us. Or they’re hiding under an anonymous name in some random cryotube somewhere. We don’t even know if they’re human, but we kind of assumed so, since they built everything on earth.”

Part of John wanted to rage, wanted to dig deep until he got answers. How many more lives could they have all saved with more warning? But Kaidan grabbed his hand discreetly, squeezing it to share his understanding as Ashley gave him a pat on the shoulder and said, “How about a tour, guys?”

Maryden and Jill had disappeared somewhere, probably a good thing, and Krem had one arm around Ashley’s shoulders, guiding her away with a smile and wave in their direction.

“Yeah, not subtle guys,” Scott muttered.

John raised an eyebrow at him as he tugged Kaidan closer. “I don’t blame them.”

“Sounds like you just need someone of your own, Scott.” Kaidan winked at him, causing the pale man to blush bright red.

“Well.”

“Hey Gil, you suffering the same wistfulness?”

Kaidan elbowed John sharply in the ribs, producing a quick ‘oof’.

The mechanic seemed perplexed as he watched them, but there was no way he could possibly be that oblivious. “Uh, yeah, sure. Sometimes.”

“You know, there’s a quick solution for that-“ Kaidan’s hand on John’s mouth didn’t really muffle the words and Macen was actually rolling his eyes.

“Give it up, Shepard. We have.”

“Hey now,” Gil interjected. “You can’t possibly be talking about Ryder and me.”

“Why not?!” Scott was too indignant to be bashful.

“Ryder, you flirt with everybody.”

“My flirting with you is PURPOSEFUL.”

“And awkward,” the turian muttered.

“Is it now?”

“YES.”

“And what about Reyes?”

“He flirts with bottles of whiskey! And it doesn’t matter, because he’s dating Harry. They’ve BEEN dating for months!”

“This is better than the last Blasto I saw. If only we had popcorn,” John leaned close to Kaidan and whispered loudly, earning another elbow jab and a snigger.

“Not hard to accomplish, Johnny. Hey Macen, how about that tour?” the biotic asked.

“Gladly.”

The two humans didn’t even notice them leaving, but while Scott looked indignant still, there was a hopeful smile on Gil’s face.

“So, welcome to Meridian. Normally, I’d let Ryder do the tour for you guys, but obviously the kid is otherwise occupied at the moment.”

“How is it that he’s a pathfinder? I would think the position would fall to someone more...mature?”

Macen looked over his shoulder at John and then at Kaidan. “Not many know this, but when the Andromeda Initiative brought Alec Ryder on, it was mainly for the advanced artificial intelligence he had created named SAM. Originally the plan was to go to the Andromeda galaxy, where having an AI like that would be a huge difference between success and failure, but The Benefactor realized we wouldn’t have the time. SAM’s still been an invaluable asset and is connected throughout most of Meridian if you need assistance, but the pathfinders?” The turian tapped at his temple. “He’s actually hardwired into us. Should one of us fall, SAM’s passed over to the next in line. When Alec died, the transfer went to Scott instead of the assigned person, but we’re pretty sure that was his intention.”

Getting into an elevator for the top floor, John fought against the urge to play devil’s advocate, but Kaidan knew where his head was at and shrugged. “I’ve talked to SAM. The things he can do are amazing and with time, I think he’ll develop a consciousness very similar to EDI’s. The last time I was here he was learning humor.” The biotic grinned cheekily at his lover. “The jokes were even worse than yours.”

John punched him lightly on the shoulder as Nicky woofed and ran out as soon as the doors were open. “Shut up, I’m hilarious and you know it.”

“I love you, but that doesn’t mean I have to pretend you’re funny. It just means I like you in spite of it.”

The affronted pout on John’s face had the biotic cackling as they followed Macen out, only to be blown away at the view. “Wow.”

They were on the top floor, not of the tallest building, but one with the greatest view of the buried valley. From there they could see everything in the main cavern and the turian started pointing out the different science buildings and crops, gestured towards areas they still mined in. There was even an underground lake.

“The krogans rioted when Tann was put in charge. I don’t really blame them, guys an ass with his own agenda, but it was something that we didn’t need on top of Sloane’s little coup. She just ended up topside with her people and have their own settlement not far from our little ‘side entrance’. We have a truce and she helps keep the raiders away, but the krogans just stormed off somewhere up north, where the radiation is still heavy and we can’t follow.”

“I imagine they’re enjoying all the challenges,” Kaidan murmured and then explained to John, “The more radiation, the bigger and stronger the wildlife. I bet the deathclaws are terrifying. Wrex and Grunt went with Jane to check out the colony and Wrex ended up staying behind to help build it with Nakmor Morda. The radiation doesn’t affect them as heavily as it does us squishy humans.”

“Huh. Grunt still with her?”

“Far as I know. Tali said she’d come down to join Meridian as soon as they get the airtrain running from Vancouver. I know she can’t wait to see Garrus again.”

“Heh, we’d love to have her. She’s helped us navigate some serious problems that arose.” The turian tilted his head at them. “And Vakarian is more than welcome to stay here. Aside from the Alliance Vault, we’re the only producers of dextro food on the continent.”

“Thanks, Macen.”

“No problem, Shepard. Anything for you guys.”

The tour continued on the ground level in a small rover, Nicky’s head out the window with Boo perched on her head as the turian explained how everything ran. John felt like a kid in a candy store, asking questions left and right, until Macen had to ask SAM to intercede through the rovers speakers, taking over as tour guide.

Kaidan sat back and watched as the indulgent boyfriend, arm wrapped around John’s waist, until they pulled up in front of HQ and they followed the pathfinder. Inside was just as impressive, vaulted white ceilings and advanced working technology, people running back and forth with work. Avitus joined them in the atrium, mandibles flaring in a small grin as he sidled close to his lover.

“Sam!” Kaidan greeted as they came across two women in a break area.

The petite woman with caramel skin and dark hair lifted her head, brown eyes shining as she recognized him and hurried over for a hug. “Kaidan! When did you get here? Oh my god! Is this him?” Those wide eyes were turned on John and he felt himself caught in a spontaneous hug. “Oh, it’s so good to finally meet you! We’ve been on tenterhooks since Avitus told us what happened! Liara was beside herself, trying to flag you guys down in Topan as soon as SAM confirmed your identity.”

Dazed, John looked to Kaidan and Macen for an explanation, which the biotic happily provided with amusement. “This is Samantha Traynor. She’s the one that found us in the Alliance Vault. Up until she visited Meridian to help with their communications network, she was Liara’s right hand for everything.”

“And what happened after you got here?”

“Ah, that would be me, I think.” The other woman stepped forward, a shy smile on her pink lips, bright against her olive skin. “Dr. Suvi Anwar, molecular biologist and astrophysicist. Pleased to meet you.”

“Yeah, Suvi kind of stole Sam away from us.” That got Kaidan a friendly swat from Suvi, but Sam just grinned widely and said a little dreamy “Sure did,” which earned a blush from her orange haired girlfriend. “But thanks to her, Meridian has a small crop of that purple maté from Thessia.”

“It’s actually quite good!” Suvi enthused. “It’s a little strong for non-biotics, so we’ve only been distributing it to biotics until we have a bigger yield.”

John grinned widely, relieved his lover would have access to it. “That’s amazing! What other plants did you bring with you?”

“Actually, it wasn’t in our seed database.” Suvi gestured towards them. “We got it in tea form from you guys and reverse engineered it.”

“What? How?”

Kaidan kissed his cheek. “From you, dummy. All those crates of tea you ordered on the Normandy for me? Had a bunch still stashed in our Go bag when I grabbed it and followed your sister off of the Normandy.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh. A lot of asari are very happy to have a taste of home in the wasteland. Just remember who you come home to.”

“Not difficult, babe.”

“Aww! Which reminds me. Macen, did you set them up in their room yet?” Sam asked.

“Not yet. Ryder hasn’t release the specs to me yet.”

Kaidan pecked Shepard on the cheek. “Why don’t you finish the tour and I’ll follow up on that, maybe get us some dinner, too?”

Not satisfied with that, John wrapped an arm around Kaidan’s waist to pull him close for a softer, deeper kiss before letting him go. “All right. We’ll try not to have too much fun without you.”

Snorting, Kaidan called Nicky over from where she’d been running circles around a flustered salarian as a female krogan chortled at them. “Just don’t show him the gun range, or he’ll never come back.”

The gun range and Avitus challenging him to a small contest did arrest his attention despite a growing anxiety in his chest, but the ping on his Omni-Tool from Kaidan telling him where the room was eased the tightness in his chest a bit. The turians smirked at each other before heading back at a speed John didn’t realize these rovers were capable of, making him whoop loudly at curious workers they passed.

Assuring the couple he’d be able to make it on his own, he headed up the stairs and located the lobby to what looked like standard apartments. The ping led him higher and higher, until he was on the top floor. For once, he really didn’t mind the royal treatment and headed inside immediately.

The room was a nice size, probably huge compared to the average apartment spaces there, and even had windows on one side looking out towards the lake and crops. The bed was large and in pristine condition with fresh sheets, nothing like out in the wasteland. Bookcases held a mix of real books and datapads, even plants.

Spartan, but still kind of homey.

“Kaidan?”

The biotic emerged from the bathroom, freshly showered and wearing borrowed Andromeda Initiative clothing. “Hey. How was the rest of the tour?”

Trying to mask the small feeling of disappointment at the sight of clothes, he gathered his boyfriend close for a kiss. “Fun. Avitus and Macen have an interesting relationship.”

“That they do,” Kaidan chuckled before sneaking another kiss. “I’m going to go pick up the food. Why don’t you go enjoy a hot shower and I’ll be right back, mmm?”

Ooohhh, that tone did all sorts of things to John’s body and he suddenly didn’t want to let go, as evidenced by his hands clamping on that firm ass. “Where are the kids at?”

Kaidan seemed confused for only half a second before his eyes twinkled up at him. “Scott actually has a space hamster, too. Boo is raising hell with him and Nicky is hanging out with Scott’s sister for the evening.”

John rested his cheek against Kaidan’s temple, reluctant to let go, and Kaidan just held him back, arms caging him until he was ready.

As much as he loved the other man...a hot shower? DAMN.

“Ok, ok. Let’s get this show on the road!” John pulled back and the biotic gave his ass a little swat before smirking and leaving after one last peck. Sighing sadly, he started taking off his boots and armor, toes kneading into the carpet as he walked over to the bathroom.

Inside it was a basic prefab style bathroom, with small touches to make it more welcome. But the water nearly came out hot automatically and he quickly disrobed to jump in. Groaning, he stood there and let the water pressure pound against knots he didn’t realize he had.

The noise coming from his mouth sounded a little too much like sex and he allowed himself to get loud in case Kaidan was back and listening. As he soaped himself up and wished for his lover, he recalled the first and only time they had time for sex. Everything else had been quickies and sleepy handjobs, but that one mission in Rapture?

John had been laying on the bed when Kaidan exited the bathroom, stomach down and ass up as he slowly humped the bed and looked over his shoulder. The expression on the biotics’ face had been a masterpiece and oh the sex they had that day before having to return to the war? Easily the best. But he planned to change that. Kaidan said he could have his ‘picket fence’ in this damn wasteland and he was going to get it!

Making sure every crevice was cleaned properly, he dried off quickly and exited the bathroom with thoughts of fun poses for Kaidan to find him in if he hadn’t returned yet...

And stopped dead inside the room, eyes wide and heart pounding.

Kaidan had lied to him.

Had to have. Because the windows had been darkened so that the dozens of candles gave the room a romantic glow. Music played softly from a radio interface, John recognized one of his own playlists, instrumental with soft hanar drum beats. Food WAS present, but it was mostly finger foods that would keep and was set up on a nightstand next to whiskey. The other nightstand had shields and refresher packs lined up on it, from god knows where.

  
“~It's Easy To Live,  
       When You're In Love,  
           And I'm So In Love,  
               There's Nothing In Life But You.~”

And there was Kaidan, naked and spread out comfortably on the bed, some sort of flower tucked between his teeth as he raised an eyebrow dramatically, comically, to disguise the tell tale nervous dance of his fingers on the bedspread.

It wasn’t as if he’d never had a girlfriend surprise him before, but this was Kaidan, this was JUST LIKE Kaidan. The gesture made his eyes burn and he had to fight the emotion so he wouldn’t upset the other man.

Today was so different from his days in the Reds.

“Is this a marriage proposal, because if it is, it’s definitely in your favor.”

The flower smacked him in the face, guided by a hint of biotic blue. “Try to do something romantic for your guy-“

John cut him off by climbing onto the bed, onto him, and kissing him with everything he felt. Hands found purchase in the hair he hadn’t buzzed in a while, and across his back as warm legs wrapped around his thighs.

This was going to end way too soon.

“Wait, wait, wait.” Pulling back, John rested his head against Kaidan’s, feeling the other man’s large hands cradle his head. “We should slow down.”

“Yeah.”

They couldn’t help sneaking kisses, however and soon their hips were rolling against each other.

“How-“ John changed the angle of the thrusts, trying to prevent himself from getting too excited. “How do you want me?”

The hands slid down from his head, caressing his back and then grabbing his butt. Groaning, John pushed back into those hands, already thinking of the hot stretch as-

“Actually,” Kaidan pulled away, moving those incredible hands to John’s hips. “I hoped we could try a little something different?”

John froze as image after image flooded his brain. “Ok. Hit me.”

“Um.” Those eyes, gold like whiskey in the candlelight, were kind of pleading up at him.

Sitting back and trying to command his dick to behave for a second, he adopted a softer expression on his face. “Tell me? You know I’m up for almost anything.”

Kaidan rubbed at his forehead nervously before meeting his eyes. “How do you feel about topping?”

Silence.

Laughing at John’s reaction dispelled some of the biotics’ nervousness. “That good, huh?”

“Fuck, yeah. Yes. Please.” Heady kisses were exchanged and the energy between them shifted as John took the reigns. “You’ve bottomed before?”

“Uh.” Kaidan scooted down until his shoulders were on the pillow, wrapping a leg back around him. “A girlfriend liked pegging, so we tried it a couple times.”

John looked at him sharply. “Not a fan?”

“It was ok. I just think I’d prefer the real thing? And I don’t know that she was all that familiar with using it on a guy.”

“What about Ty?”

“We didn’t get too far. Blow jobs and some fingering.”

“And the fingering?” John asked as his own fingertips slipped down between his cheeks and blunt nails gently dancing around the sensitive skin to tease it, his other hand finding the biotic’s cock, thumb rubbing under the head.

Meeting his eyes, Kaidan started looking a little fevered. “He definitely knew what he was doing.”

“Mmm. See that you manscaped. Planning this, were you, Alenko?”

“Alenko,” he parroted back, wondering. “You haven’t called me that in years.”

That was true. They’d started having their conversations on the Normandy SR-1 and the Lieutenant became Alenko and then Kaidan. “Lot of things have changed between now and then. So. Why this change? Any reason?”

Kaidan raised a hand to John’s face. “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you. I want to be as close to you as I can.”

“Fuck, yes, of course. Anything, Kaidan.”

Clearing his throat, the biotic grinned up at him. “I was VERY thorough with my shower. So, if you wanted to explore...?”

It took a minute and when the light bulb went on, John felt breathless. “You mean rimming?”

“You think I didn’t notice the blatant longing?”

“Oh come on-“

“You would literally stare at my asshole sometimes. You are not subtle.”

Huffing a breath, John didn’t know why he was arguing this if it meant he could do it. He’d never been a huge fan of the taste or possible mishaps, but he loved taking partners apart and the thought of Kaidan and That Ass being played like a fucking banjo.

“You had this done to you before? Have you done it?” John inquired.

“No and no.”

“Anything off the table?”

“I don’t think so?”

“Fuck I love you. And not just because-“

A kiss cut him off. “I know, Johnny. I know. I love you too.”

More kissing and then John was trailing his kisses down, stopping at a nipple to eagerly suck it into his mouth, only to have the man beneath him nearly buck him off as he raked his teeth over it and teased it with the tip of his tongue.

“Oh my god! John, I don’t. Wait.”

Resting his chin on caramel skin dusted in dark hair, bright blue eyes twinkled up at Kaidan. “So, I never asked, just how sensitive are these bad boys?”

Kaidan looked down at him, chest already starting to rise and fall rapidly, before smiling brightly and curiously. “Pretty damn sensitive. What are you plotting?”

“You ever come from someone just playing with them?”

“Uhm.”

“Yes?! Who?”

Kaidan shifted again, getting a thigh against John’s neglected cock. “When I was a teenager, by myself, but it wasn’t a very strong orgasm.” Seeing the look on his boyfriend’s face, he added, “Yes, you can try. Maybe another time, though?”

John reached up to give him another kiss, before sliding right down and taking that gorgeous cock in his mouth. The pre-come tasted slightly different, probably from the food of the wasteland, but it wasn’t bad. Taking it deep a couple times, he lifted each time to swirl his tongue around the little helmet and then flutter underneath it. On either side of him he could feel Kaidan’s legs sprawling as hands came up to gently frame his head.

Always such a polite guy, he had to wonder if it was a Canadian thing.

Kissing the tip, he winked up at Kaidan before diving down and licking him, right from that cute little hole, following the raphe up between his balls. The biotic’s breath hiccuped and his brown eyes darkened.

“How’s that feel?”

“Weird. But good. Really good.”

“Awesome. Let’s turn you over.”

Kaidan hesitated a second, then started to maneuver his legs around to comply. As soon as they weren’t tangled together, John grabbed his hips and positioned him right where he wanted him, causing the other man to moan and lean back on his elbows.

Parting the caramel cheeks (had he been sunbathing naked?), he started by simply dropping small kisses around the freshly shaven skin, ducking down to mouth at the heavy balls. Licking over the area again, he could feel his lover was still kind of tense and promptly blew a raspberry right over the tight furl of muscle.

Kaidan yipped and fell down, looking over his shoulder with incredulity. “JOHN, what the hell?!”

Chuckling, John rubbed the ball of his thumb into his perineum. “Lighten up, babe.”

Kaidan tried to glare at him, but instead, a smile captured his lips before he tucked his head back down. “Ok, ok. Have at me.”

“Mmm. I will. Joyously,” he murmured, pulling up the biotics’ hips again.

A snort. “Nerd.”

This time, he dove right in, jaw dropped and tongue licking at the muscle, over and over, determined for it to relax. Trailing open mouthed kisses down as far the hanging cock, all the way up to those little dimples above that delicious booty. As soon as he felt his boyfriend relaxing into it, he went back to the muscle and licked furiously, allowing his stubbled cheeks to rub the skin around it, mindful of not causing too much friction. Hearing soft moans escape between Kaidan’s arms, he started stabbing at the hole with his pointed tongue, focusing on the upward side.

Changing gears, he peppered more kisses up and down the parted flesh, sneaking in playful bites on those incredible ass cheeks and then went back in to suck at the pinkened hole, thumb rubbing and pulling down at it’s edge.

Pride swelled up in John as Kaidan started moaning louder, hands pushing forward towards the headboard and leaning back to meet his rhythm. Despite the ache in his jaw and mouth from being out of practice, he upped the ante, tugging at the swinging cock underneath as he plundered the relaxing muscle until Kaidan was swearing and thrusting back to meet him, knees sliding further apart and hips tilting up for easier access as John slipped in a finger to stretch him and tentatively rub at the little nub of his prostate inside.

Kaidan’s body jerked like it’d been zapped, ghostly blue flickering across his skin for a moment as he yelled loudly into the room.

Reluctantly John slowed, pulling back and away to give the round cheeks playful slaps, making them bounce and jiggle as Kaidan collected himself enough to look back at him. Those brown eyes were dazed, face flushed dark and lips bitten red.

“So. Definitely a yes going forward?”

The biotic managed to roll his eyes and turn back over, half heartedly kicking at his boyfriend’s smug countenance. Feeling giddy, John reached over to the nightstand to clean his face with wipes and popped in a refresher packet. As soon as his mouth was sparkly clean, he leaned down and kissed Kaidan.

Slowly. Methodically. Passionately.

Until the biotic was reaching down and grasping John’s erection, using it’s pre-come for a smooth tug and passing his thumb lazily over the large head.

“Ready, lover?”

Laughing, Kaidan leaned back and winked at him. “Ready. Babe.”

“Hmm. Still not sure about that.”

“Wanna try stud muffin instead?”

“Actually, that doesn’t sound so bad.”

Kaidan sighed, trying to sound exasperated and coming up fond. “Of course it doesn’t. Can we do it like this?”

“What, fuck?”

“Yes, John. Can we fuck like pyjak in this position?”

Very few occasions called for vulgarity in Kaidan’s vocabulary. One of which was sexy times, and John exploited the hell out of it when he could. “Pass me that pillow.”  
The pillow was tossed at him and he tucked it under Kaidan’s hips, two fingers already slipping passed the sensitive rim to stretch it properly. John held up his other hand and Kaidan placed a lubricant capsule in it without words exchanged and it was slipped inside, the capsule melting and allowing finger number three inside.

“Oh yeah, ok. That’s nice.” Kaidan leaned down onto the fingers and John playfully rubbed his thumb against the perineum and thrust a few times as he twisted his wrist. “AhHah! FUCK. Fuck. Fuck me, John. Come on.”

“Shield me, captain!”

“Uh. Do you want one?”

Blinking blindly a second, John looked up at him. “You don’t want me to wear one?”

“If that’s ok?” Kaidan asked. “I haven’t been with anyone and we’ve had regular checkups with Meridian and all the BoS bases.”

Rubbing at the thighs on either side of him, his nails catching on the soft hair, John smiled softly down at him. “Sure, ok. Yeah. If that’s what you want?”

“Please?”

There was a frog in John’s throat at more evidence of this new side of Kaidan and he had the sudden certainty that he’d burn the world down for this man to protect him. He wasn’t used to feeling the need, the biotic normally standing stronger and too stubborn to ask for help.

They kissed between gasps for breath as John’s fingers played with him, until their hips were thrusting together and Kaidan was reaching down, trying to guide him inside. Not wanting to rush this, John took over, redirecting the hand to Kaidan’s erection, flushed dark and drooling down into the trail of hair on the biotic’s belly. The fact that Kaidan had to clamp down on the eager flesh rather than tease it was proof they needed to slow down a bit.

He wasn’t really thick, but his glans were and he always tried to be careful in that first stretch, so he eased in. It had the bonus effect of watching himself sink into that heat for the first time, the shiny-wet pink head a nice contrast to the darker skin around it.

“God, you feel so good. How is it? Better than pegging?”

“Fuck, yes. God, Johnny. So good. Definitely.”

“Sweet,” he panted. Settling inside, he waited and savored the feeling of snug heat, allowing Kaidan to adjust. The biotic was eager though and soon it was a team effort of John thrusting in and Kaidan pulling with the legs tucked over John’s trim hips. They started slow, savoring the time they had for once, but the handjobs from that morning weren’t enough.

  
But Kaidan was changing the game again, made him pause for a moment inside while the biotic leaned up and stole a kiss. And another. And another. Until they kept kissing, softly, Kaidan occasionally clenching gently around him like a reminder. A low moan escaped between their lips as the vice around his dick felt too good and they started moving again.

John found himself being pulled down on top of Kaidan at one point, their skin slipping together creating more heat and more sweat, but he just pushed at his boyfriend’s thighs to change the angle. Thank god for his flexibility. Kissing was tricky and when he felt himself getting close, John shifted, angling for Kaidan’s prostate and reached down for the other man’s neglected cock. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see toes curling as Kaidan’s ass clamped down on him, skin flickering blue as he shuddered and gasped loudly through his release.

Watching him like this was breathtaking and as the other man came undone, eyes closed and mouth open, John kissed everywhere he could reach. Pulling out carefully, he took himself in hand and jerked frantically. Honey brown eyes opened to watch him, warm hands coming up to caress him.

“Come on, Johnny. Come, right on me. Come on.”

“F-fuck. Kaidan!”

Ropes of translucent white shot out onto Kaidan, marking his abs and chest hair, before John all but collapsed on top of him, panting. Arms came up around him, pulling him closer.

They lay cradled against each other until their breath evened out and the drying sweat and come started getting itchy and gross. They shared a shower after stripping off the top blanket on the bed, holding on to each other after washing and swayed together as John put on some slow music.

Later found them propped up against the headboard and snacking on the food Kaidan had grabbed from the mess hall as they discussed their plans for the morning. Snagging the bottle of whiskey and taking a pull, he paused in the middle of offering it to Kaidan.

“What is it?”

Burning blue eyes stared at the bottle, then the attractive body tucked up close to his and then the brown eyes watching him with amusement. “Ever done body shots before, babe?”

Kaidan laughed and took the bottle from him. “You first!”

 

 

 


	10. Shipping Up To Boston

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the boys are on their way back to Garrus and get some new info from EDI that makes them investigate the Commonwealth.

It was a saturday night, probably sunday morning, and Shepard was sneaking away from the bar where he and his fellow cadets had taken respite after their punishing week of training. Jane had heard about the dueling piano bar months ago from one of her flings and they’d been regulars as often as they could be.

At this point, they were known by name and more often than not, the Shepard twins got their drinks for free. Especially after the one instance where they were dragged on stage for their birthday to be made fun of, only to turn it back on the pianists by commandeering the pianos, causing the bar to howl with laughter and cheers.

Not that their skills were anything to brag about.

Tonight his sister had managed to hang out with him and the other cadets for the most part, a vast improvement since Maine. While they were known as twin terrors at the academy and a great team for mischief, she still had a hard time meeting his gaze.

Shepard had left the bar when she started making more and more excuses to leave the table. Sure, they’d made some sort of truce, gotten cheesy anchor tattoos to match their promise of going forward and not looking back.

Easier said than done.

She’d chased him down outside when she came back from the dance floor to find him gone and he’d sent her right on back without even looking at her and flipped her the bird as he walked on. He had a feeling she would always chase him down and had to wonder what the hell she’d found in Boston after he left, but he had his suspicions that the Reds had spun a bullshit story to try to manipulate her.

Not that he cared these days.

It was turning to fall, and even though it was still warm in the day, his breath left in little puffs of clouds beneath his pinkened nose as he walked along the wharf and drank from the bottle of black rum he’d snuck from the bar. It was more early than late, but when he got to the First Contact memorial fountain outside the Alliance headquarters, it was still lit up and glowing against the black-blue sky.

Climbing onto the edge of the memorial away from the worst of the water’s spray, he huddled into his hoodie, beanie tugged low over his brow as he listened to the gulls and the surf. From here he could see ships leaving the harbor, everything from fishing boats to commercial ships.

His butt had gone numb from the cold stone and he’d started to crave crab cakes when he realized he wasn’t alone. An officer stood just a few yards away from him, briefcase in hand, probably on his way to work. High ranking, most likely, to be here so early on a sunday. Ready to ignore the unwanted attention, he cradled the bottle and faced the water, hoping it wasn’t a hardass ready to disrupt his quiet.

“John Shepard?”

Incredulous and wary, he turned and stared at the man, wondering what he could have possibly done to get in trouble now. Rather, where he had failed to cover his tracks for any number of things. “Sir?”

A small grin broke out on the man’s face and he strode forward with an extended hand. “Captain David Anderson. I’m friends with James McGraw.”

Staring hard at the captain through the rum influenced buzz, he decided not to stand but shook the hand. He wasn’t on duty, not even a real marine yet, and he really didn’t care. About anything, really. But that comment raised his interest, as well as the fact that his underage drinking wasn’t being called into question aside from a noting glance. “You know old Capn’ Flint?”

Anderson seemed very happy just to stand there in the cold with him. “I knew him back before his pirating days. Back when we used to get into trouble at the academy together.”

That grabbed his attention. Abandoning the rum precariously on the edge of the fountain’s statue, he stood up and stepped down from the monument. Anderson was a tall guy, but on even ground Shepard was still taller. “Did you know my dad?”

Snorting, Anderson shook his head ruefully. “He was the one always convincing us to get into trouble! But he was also the one who always got us out of trouble, too. So I guess that made it even. I’m sorry you didn’t get the chance to hear more of the ‘interesting’ stories when you got older.”

“If you knew I was his son, why did you mention McGraw?”

Dawn was coming, chasing the deep indigo in the sky away and with the way Anderson stood with his back to it, it cast him in shadow. But his smile was bright against his dark skin and more than a little sly. “Smarter than he acts or looks, that’s what Jamie told me just a couple weeks ago. He had a lot to say about you.”

“Nice mix of bad things in there, I’m sure.”

“Mmm, nothing much worse than the average teenage drama, I believe. Mostly he talked about places you could go if you bothered to get your head out of your ass.”

Laughing, Shepard scooped up his lonely looking bottle. “So, what? You’re going to be my friend, my inside guy? The one that helps me rise in the ranks?”

“No, I’m going to be the asshole that gets your head out of your ass. Waste of a perfectly good marine otherwise.”

“Yeah, sure. Out of the goodness of your heart,” Shepard muttered, starting to turn away and take another pull from the nearly empty bottle.

“I miss your father.” That had Shepard turning cautiously back. “He could be an ass sometimes, guess that runs in the family. Drinking like a fish certainly seems to. But he was also one of the best men I ever knew. I’d like to get to know what’s left of him in this world.”

“You know my mother, too?”

“Hannah?” Anderson shook his head and huffed out a breath, the small cloud leaving his mouth glowing under the lamplight. “I met her a couple times before they got married. She seemed different before his death, more spark in her. Some things can break a person. It doesn’t excuse their behavior and maybe one day you’ll believe me when I say I wish I could have been there for you and your sister after Mindoir.”

Shepard scoffed, but didn’t turn away. Not many people he met knew his dad or talked willingly about him. “So, you’re going to be my mentor or something?”

“Or something. How about we make a deal?”

That set Shepard on high alert and he bet Anderson didn’t miss the way he tensed up for a fight. Not that he wasn’t always ready for one. A person lived longer that way.

“Every good mark, every promotion, every commendation you get in the academy and the hereafter? I’ll share what I know about your father. Embarrassing stories, missions that aren’t classified. Hell, even his favorite color.”

“Green.”

“It wasn’t always green,” Anderson was smirking now. The bastard knew he had him.

That was okay. If this ‘deal’ turned sideways, Shepard always had several escape routes planned. It also shouldn’t be too hard to get anything on the guy, friend of McGraw’s and his dad aside. There was always a dark side to someone, always a secret in the closet.

~*N7*~

Watching his boyfriend pilot a vertibird was a turn on, who knew?

The autopilot functions weren’t all that advanced so Kaidan had to concentrate during the flight as they all talked, thick brows furrowed over a pair of patrolman sunglasses and damn. They were going to have to have sex in the bird at some point, soon as Ash and the ‘kids’ were elsewhere.

The Fusion was strapped in the back between the miniguns, gleaming like new and painted over in N7 colors. The power armor had been left behind for now, but John had pried off the clover charm to take with him. Nicky once again had her harness attached to the ring in the floor, head stuck out the side and tongue lolling out against the wind. Gil had given her a pair of goggles to wear just for that purpose.

Once in a while, she’d bark at some big creature or raiders in lofty perches (buildings or crumbling overpasses usually) and John would happily scoot over to send bullets flying at anything that tried to attack them with a minigun. The vertibird wasn’t designed for high altitudes like an airplane or the post-contact helicopters, but Kaidan and Ashley did well at avoiding spontaneous radstorms and even behemoth super mutants that liked throwing boulders at them.

John talked to them about his travels as they passed over the lands he’d been in and Kaidan shared some of their own, giving light to the new scars on his body. The last hour or so, Ash let him take over, talking him through how to use the old technology.

“Well, there it is.” Just as he’d left it. They hovered over the graveyard until they found a level enough spot near the ‘river’ for them to land. Once unhooked, Nicky bounded out, barking and chasing after what might have been a squirrel. Or a chicken.

Boo peeked out from where he’d been snoozing in the sidecar and then settled back down.

“So, I came out from an exit overrun by the river right there-“

“Which mausoleum was the main entrance?” Something in Kaidan’s tone had him spinning around and hunting for the very structure.

It was flat ground now, no elevator, no fake mausoleum. But the debris from the fallout had been cleared and it looked like someone had been digging down to the Vault. Weapons drawn, they made their way over to peer down the large hole.

There was a hastily assembled rope and pulley system leading down into the dark, but there was no way of knowing how deep it went down. “Thoughts?”

“Hmm. I vote for not going in the dark hole made by unknowns,” Ashley quipped, watching their backs and scanning the perimeter.

“EDI? You picking anything up?”

“Not from the Vault, but there are life signs headed this way.”

Turning towards the dots appearing on their HUDs, they raised their weapons as the blips got closer and spread out into position, but there was a blur of gray and white as Nicky charged forward, barking excitedly. The dog was bouncing on the newcomers before they could properly identify them, but the unmistakable height and shape of a turian came around the corner of the church next, and John hurried forward.

“Garrus?!”

“Hey, Shepard. How was the field trip?”

“Fuck.” The turian was quite obviously surprised when the human threw himself around the taller figure, nearly bowling them over in his enthusiasm. It was awkward even with John’s height, due to armor they’re both wearing and the shape of their physiology, but they managed not to fall over. “Damn, it’s good to see your ugly face.”

“Because it’s the only way yours looks-“ a sharp breath. “Kaidan?”

Letting go, John turned to see Kaidan right behind him and Ashley jogging over, smiles blooming on their faces as Nicky started running around them with a stick in her mouth, trying to get someone to pay attention to her and play.

“Hey Vakarian! You and me still have a score to settle. I can’t believe you went to such lengths to escape it.”

The turian’s gaze snapped to Ashley as she spoke, then back to Kaidan. “How? What happ-“

John cut him off with a gentle hand to his arm. “Tali’s alive. Jane got them all to another Vault in time. Soon as she can, our favorite quarian’s on her way down to a place that grows dextro. They’ve got space for both of you.”

Talons gripped his forearm in return and Garrus looked down at him, mandibles trembling and eyes bright. “Spirits, Shepard. And EDI?”

“Not sure yet. I’ve got a copied part of her programing on my Omni-Tool that’s been helping me navigate the wasteland, but I don’t know-“

A ping on the Omni-Tool had them both looking down as EDI started talking. “A new communications tower has gone up, allowing me access to a new data drop.”

“Oooookay, is it a Priority?”

“It is not, however, I believe you’ll want to know asap.”

“All right.” Information popped up on the Omni-Tool, adding maps and updating files and locations on personnel. “Well, that’s new.”

Garrus explained the people that had investigated the vertibird with him were nearby settlers, wary, but friendly enough. They’d found information about the Vault and had been trying to find ways to dig down for its resources when he had been woken early. The turian had immediately started looking for ways of escape, unable to follow the route John had taken with his physique. He’d managed to finagle radio parts to send out a message and rationed out what dextro was left, but with the town’s help and the equipment left behind by the Vault door, he’d been freed within a couple of days.

Not that he wasn’t ravenous when they handed him rations from their packs on the bird. Boo perked up when they wandered over and launched himself at the tall figure, scurrying over him and chirping as he went until Garrus was laughing and skritching under a small ear.

“She remembered your rodent, too?”

“Kaidan’s to thank for that, apparently.” They sat on the edge of the bird after EDI’s debrief while Ash and Kaidan spoke to the locals. It seemed to be their thing now, as liaison for the BoS and what was left of the Alliance. John was happy to leave them to it.

“Really, Shepard. I’m happy for you. As much as I...care for Tali, we can only hope to have what you do one day.”

“Thanks. You know, they’ve been treating her in the cryotube all these years? Soon as she gets to Meridian, Sam tells me they’re going to try introducing her to the environment. Long as she stays down there, away from the rads? She should be fine.”

“Spirits, that’s good. I can’t- What about the other quarians?”

“They didn’t have the same treatments available as the Alliance Vault, but with the information Tali’s bringing down, they hope to mimic it.”

Snorting, Garrus waved his talons. “Next you’ll tell me you’ve cured the genophage.”

“Well.”

Never before had he seen such a startled turian, not even when he and Jane found ‘archangel’ on Omega. “I need something stronger than water right now.”

Laughing, John clapped him on the back and offered him a flask, sneaking a small bottle of whiskey for himself. “To Mordin!”

“Mordin? Knew that bastard would come around one day.” They clinked the canisters together and took a shot. “How is he?”

“Back in cryosleep. Apparently, Jane had to actually knock him out and put him back in. He had all this stuff he wanted to work on. Grunt and Wrex took the cure to the krogan colony out in the wastes as an act of goodwill.”

“Smart move. Hopefully, it’ll all work out for the better, rather than coming back to, what is it? Bite us in the ass?”

Nodding, John clinked their respective bottles together and they took another shot.

“So. You’re going to run off to the Commonwealth.” It wasn’t a question, not after what the latest data drop held. “This mean you’re forgiving your sister for whatever you two were fighting or not fighting about?”

Sighing, John took one more pull before tucking away the whiskey. “Some things it’s not about forgiving. Don’t you want to know what happened to everyone else?”

“Sure. Keep us in the loop and as soon as we have enough dextro to last, you know we’ll join you. Just, do me one favor?” Garrus asked as Kaidan started heading back over.

“Hit me.”

“Don’t wait to invite us to the wedding.”

John felt blindsided a bit, staring at his boyfriend as he came over. The biotic grinned fondly at him and asked, “What? You’ve got the strangest look on your face.”

“I may be turian, but I’m pretty sure he always looks like that.”

Garrus got a punch for that, but John just grinned up at Kaidan. “So, wanna go check out the leads with me?”

“As if you’re ever leaving me behind again.”

“There are some benefits to you being behind him, I believe.”

They both stared at Garrus, but it was Kaidan who laughed and agreed with him as John just raised an eyebrow and echoed something from years ago, “Fleshy bits, Vakarian.”

Less than an hour later, they parted ways. Ashley flew Garrus back to Meridian and the boys took the motorcycle up north, following the coastline and faded signs for New York and then New England. They had to steer clear of anything with overpasses to avoid raiders and delays, but they made good time.

Chin tucked over John’s shoulder and arms around his waist, Kaidan had to shout, “This certainly beats walking everywhere. We didn’t get ground transport until joining the BoS.”

Patting his boyfriend’s knee in acknowledgement, John curiously checked out local channels as they went, turning up the dial as they skirted around the terrible knotted mess of New York so he and Nicky could sing along to ‘Bongo, Bongo, Bongo (Civilization)’.

Kaidan’s chuckle by his ear energized him like no other, and the singalongs became more and more hilarious as they traveled on, until Nicky got sleepy and tuckered down in the sidecar and John trailed off to focus on the road.

Then Kaidan picked up where they left off, but his raspy voice was quiet and beautiful rather than loud and playfully off-key:

“~Like The Sailor Said, Quote,  
       Ain’t That A Hole In The Boat?  
          My Head Keeps Spinnin’,  
             I Go To Sleep And Keep Grinnin’,  
                If This Is Just The Beginning,  
                   My Life Is Going To Be Bee-Yoo-Tee-Ful!~”

The words seemed heavier than the bouncy song implied, the arms around him secure as they flew across roads and trails on the Fusion, disproving the wind as the sole cause of his watery eyes behind sunglasses. Garrus’ words came back to him as Kaidan continued to sing with the next romantic song that popped on, and he wondered. He’d never dared to think of marriage, but he also never dreamed of ‘picket fences’ past Mindoir. The biotic had searched and waited almost a whole year for him. They had known each other for a few years now.

Was it a possibility?

They didn’t get to talk much with the wind, content to just be so close. It was getting dark as they neared Massachusetts. As other radio stations tuned out, Shepard searched for others and hit the jackpot when he found one station playing Dropkick Murphys and other Irish themed music.

Kaidan tucked his head close to John’s neck and hugged him tight as his lover cranked up the volume and shouted the lyrics to Shipping Up To Boston. John’s mom had been mostly Irish, his dad from New England and both a huge fan of the band playing.

A lot of the songs were jaunty, one making John recall fun nights drenched in black rum, but then another Dropkick Murphys song came on and he slowed down just enough that the music wasn’t fighting against the wind.

“This song,” he said only loud enough to be heard.

“What about it, Johnny?”

Breathing deeply, John admired the sight of the struggling vegetation framing the roads as the sun skipped behind clouds and rain started pattering down. “It always reminded me of my dad, I wanted to get a tattoo for him, even went to a parlor to get it done.”

“What happened?”

“I listened to it again. After Horizon, it had more meaning, opened my eyes to some things.”

Kaidan’s hand drifted up to rest over John’s heart where the tattoo was and he covered it with his own a moment as they listened.

“~I Traveled Far And Wide,  
      And Laid This Head In Many Ports,  
        I Was Guided By A Compass,  
           Hope theI Saw Beauty To The North.~”

They traveled on and just as John felt the need for another stimpak to ease the ache of traveling, they saw signs for Nuka World and John slowed down and stopped.

“Oo, amusement park. What do you think?” Maybe he was a little excited at the thought of seeing if any of the rides still functioned. It could be like a date...if there wasn’t anything trying to kill them.

“Nuka World,” EDI started. “Most recently cleared of raiders by the General of the Minutemen, it has been turned into neutral territory and New England’s largest trading post. Some patrons are trying to get the amusement park up and running.”

“And the Minutemen?”

“A civilian militia created to bring Commonwealth settlers together against the perils of the wasteland. Since the instatement of the latest General, settlements have never been stronger or as prosperous. The General is in part responsible for the Brotherhood of Steel’s infighting against Maxson’s people, but holds strong alliances with all other local factions, the exceptions being the Gunners and raiders in general. Their base is located at The Castle.”

“Sweet. Thanks, EDI.”

Before he could ask Kaidan about his thoughts, she spoke again. “I recommend heading for the Castle. Nuka World is two hours further away in the opposite direction.”

Slumping, he felt Kaidan rubbing at his shoulders. “Maybe another time? Who knows, they might even have some rides working by then.”

“All right. Let’s see if this Castle is a real castle.”

“The Castle actually was once known as Fort Independence before the war,” EDI added.

“Even better.” Now he was curious to see this infamous Commonwealth EDI’s mobile platform had disappeared into.

A huge part of southeast Massachusetts was aptly renamed the Glowing Sea, for being ground zero to a large group of reapers that exploded, a land saturated in radiation that they navigated around to New Quincy. It was late, too late to visit the Castle, so they found friendly enough settlers there that didn’t have a hotel yet, but were more than happy enough to rent out shelter to them for the night.

Their mayor, a man going by the name MacCready, was certainly an interesting enough person. He asked them their reasons for visiting the Castle and when they explained it was personal, his eyes were sharp and pointed despite his lazy sprawl. Nicky liked him, however, and it seemed it was a feeling reluctantly returned.

“The General has a dog like that. You take care of them and they’ll take care of you. I can tell you the quickest way there. You fellas planning on staying long?”

John looked at Kaidan and the biotic grinned thoughtfully. “Well, you guys got anything to do around here?”

“Huh. I don’t really know, we’ve been busy rebuilding this place since we cleared out the gunners. The people at the Castle will know more. The Minutemen are constantly going out to all the settlements and doing whatever it is that they do. Killing super mutants, saving babies, planting mutfruit.”

Kaidan leaned back to look at John next to him, considering in the candlelight of the slapdash bar. “You know, we talked about visiting the coast.”

There was a lump in his throat and MacCready excused himself in a panic as soon as he recognized the emotional moment forming between them. “Yeah. We did.”

The smile forming on the biotic’s face was slow, but it ended blindingly and John found himself mirroring the smile. “I really didn’t think we’d make it. Or me, at least.”

Under the table, Kaidan grabbed his hand and squeezed hard. “I know.”

“Did you think we would?”

“I had faith. You’re kind of like a cat with nine lives, Johnny. You deserve some good in your life.” He leaned close, staring into his lover’s bright eyes. “I want to be one of the ones who gives it to you.”

Like anything would have prevented him from kissing him after that. There were some wolf whistles and even an empty can tossed at them from the cranky bartender, but Nicky burst out from under the table to bark circles around her, until she retreated into the back with a shriek as Boo launched at her face.

Their laughter at the shenanigans pushed them away from the kiss, but they decided to turn in, get an early start. John fell asleep on the two cots they pushed together with Kaidan spooning him from behind and Nicky curled in front, thoughts and his pounding heart barely allowing him to fall asleep.

When they woke the next day, his heart was still fluttering nervously even as they neared one of the guard posts right outside the large stone fort located right on the sea. The fort was almost castle-like, with five sides that ended in extended points that each carried a mortar cannon and the flag of the Minutemen: a white lighting bolt crossed over a rifle on faded blue.

They were waved through the main entrance as soon as they parked the motorcycle, and they entered the large and busy inner courtyard created by the five walls. Stalls of traders and craftsman lined up one side near signs advertising a cafeteria inside and the rest seemed to be dedicated to a small training yard, the Minutemen radio tower and even a garden.

Barking drew their attention and Nicky ran up a set of wrought iron stairs where rows of dog houses lined the top of the ‘castle’ next to turrets and more guards.

“Sorry about that,” called a warm, commanding voice. “We love dogs and it keeps the residents happy, so we have a small army. Whenever there’re new puppies, we send them out to the settlements.”

Kaidan smiled at the blond man in mismatched armor and a Pip-Boy walking over to them, tall enough to give John a run for his money and just as built. Also just as handsome. Clearing his throat, the biotic said, “Sounds like a great idea to me.”

“Yeah. We even catch cats for the smaller settlements that need a morale boost. Hi, I’m Steve. You guys new in town?”

Definitely someone in charge. “Kaidan Alenko, former Alliance and liaison with the BoS. This is John Shepard, also formerly of the Alliance.”

“Ahh! Great to meet you. West Coast Brotherhood?” It seemed so simple. Drop off the ‘Commander’ and no one recognized him these days, the man’s blue eyes keeping mostly to Kaidan.

“Yup. Not one of Maxson’s people.”

“I didn’t think so.” The man waved for them to follow him. They headed inside and passed the barracks to enter a room dominated by a conference table and filing cabinets, but appeared to be living quarters. Small windows in the stone wall offered a little light, but visibility was mostly dependent on the lights strung up inside along the walls. “Maxson’s army isn’t even run by a Maxson. All that ‘Maxson’s Army’ BS? All from the old families that have supported them over the years. Guy’s a glorified civilian these days now that his past came and pulled the stick out of his ass.”

“Huh,” John murmured, checking out the room, noting the oversized Minutemen flag, the double bed with a soldier’s footlocker and a set of stairs leading down into the earth below. The other man noticed his curiosity, but just nodded his head at them with a smirk. The notorious General? “So who runs it these days?”

“Well, Charlie’s currently in charge with Paladin Danse. She’s the one that came up from the Capital Wasteland to knock sense into Arthur Maxson before the man murdered his own best friend. She’s just a sentinel, but they’re sending up General Sarah Lyons to take over operations.” Steve shook his head and offered them water and places to sit at one end of the table. “Can you believe it? A whole conspiracy to fake Lyon’s death to get Arthur to start a war. I kinda feel sorry for the kid, but a lot of people got hurt. So, what brings you guys in?”

“We’re looking for some people. One is named EDI. She’s an advanced AI from before the war, has a robotic mobile platform. She came this way looking for information.”

“Oh, EDI!” Steve leaned forward, eyes lit up. “You must be her crew. Man, what a pistol she is. She’s running supplies up to Maine right now in exchange for information, she’ll be back in a couple days. She’s been waiting on some news from...your sister, I believe?” Blue eyes widened and did a double take on John. “John Shepard. Commander John Shepard?”

Damn. “Yes.”

Laughing, Steve rocked back on the chair legs. “Oh man, have I heard some fun stories about you!”

Kaidan dropped his forehead into his palm and John closed his eyes. “Great. Just what has she been telling you?” EDI’s humor had its own genre and wasn’t known for keeping personal stuff private.

Steve waved them off. “Later, and don’t worry, the best stories I heard were from someone else.”

“Someone else? Who-?”

“You’ll probably want to know about your twin. She borrowed our BoS airship, the Prydwen. She took it on a scouting mission to look for yours, the Normandy? There was a data burst we got with some new towers a few months back and she went to investigate. Haven’t seen them since, but they had plenty of supplies to last them.”

“You’re BoS?” Kaidan asked.

Shrugging, Steve waffled his hands. “I was? I became a Knight until Elder Maxson started giving me orders that didn’t agree with me. Thank god Charlie showed up from the Capital Wasteland when she did.”

“So, you’re the General of the Minutemen.”

“Bingo.” Steve smiled widely. “Well. Kind of. Really, I just got things started. Preston has always been the heart of the Minutemen. I made powerful friends, got some good alliances, but he’s the driving force. Soon as he’s ready for the role, I’ll happily hand him the reigns.”

“Preston Garvey?”

A small frown graced the man’s face. “You’ve heard of him?”

John looked at Kaidan. “Yeah. He’s actually one of the people we came to see.”

“Ah. And the reason?”

“It’s personal. Not something we wanted to discuss with others before him.”

Steve watched them, but seemed to accept that and nodded. “He’s checking up on his people in Sanctuary. It was one of our first successful settlements and it’s become his pet project. He’s due back any day now.”

Catching movement out of the corner of his eye, John and Kaidan turned to the door just as a German shepherd hurried over to nose at their hands for pets. The dog was wearing goggles and spiked armor, with a red bandana around his neck.

“Dogmeat!” Steve called delightedly and the dog abandoned them to leap onto the other man’s lap as if he were no more than a few pounds. “So that’s who you were getting into trouble with?”

“That’s me,” a ghoul drawled as he leaned against the doorway. John had met a few ‘sane’ ghouls, but this guy was of a different caliber, looking like some sort of colonial pirate as he savored his cigarette. “Trouble.”

“Gentlemen, meet Hancock.” The ghoul wiggled his fingers in greeting when Steve gestured at him. “Mayor of Goodneighbor. It’s right in the heart of the city, so lots of hot zones around it we haven’t cleared out yet, but it’s a great place for resources and The Third Rail a bar with a great lounge singer, you can hear her stuff on Diamond City Radio. What are you guys looking to do while you wait?”

Asking Steve for suggestions had been the best idea. He’d been without transport after waking from his own cryosleep in a Vault, and had been up and down and throughout the entire Commonwealth and beyond. Nuka World had a settlement that was still being built, so he could give them an update on the park’s condition. Nicky trotted in as he listed all the locations in order of types of Things To Do and curiously nosed at Dogmeat, who jumped down to nose back.

“Well, look here,” Hancock murmured, black eyes on the dogs. “Looks like Dogmeat got himself a girlfriend. You’ve just lost your best friend, Steve.”

“Uhhhh.” John looked at Kaidan in mild panic. “I don’t think we’re ready to be grandparents.”

“We can always separate them, if you wish. But if anything happened, Gene can place the puppies in a good home. Guy has a big heart.”

“I heard that’s not the only big thing he has. But, you would know, right Steve?” Hancock winked at him.

Steve blushed and deflected by turning to them. “So! You’re together? I’ve got some great ideas for a date.”

Chuckling, the ghoul added his two - indecent - cents, making them all laugh and turn bright red. Steve explained that most of the settlements were willing to put people up for free as long as they pulled their weight and he marked all the locations on their Omni-Tools. The boys headed out, Dogmeat trailing after them and Nicky until they got to their motorcycle. John half expected the other dog to jump in the sidecar, but he just watched with big liquid eyes and whined gently as they left.

The Commonwealth was large. Not including Meridian, it was also the closest thing John had seen to real civilization since waking, but he’d also been limited to a lot of roads on his journey. Kaidan told him about similar areas getting their feet back under them - Vancouver, where the Alliance Vault was located, the most prevalent - but confirmed John’s thoughts for the most part.

They decided on the Starlight Drive-In, where they had movies playing every night on the repaired screen and cars that had been refurbished for people to sit in next to speakers that still carried a warble that needed to be fixed. Flanking one side of the parking lot was a long building facing out towards the street, which had an apartment they got for the night.

It was the closest thing they’d ever had to a real date and John loved it. They had burgers at the diner and shared a Sunset Float, listening to the jukebox and exchanging stories from the Normandy.

When it started getting dark out, the diner dimmed the house lights, allowing the string lights to set a more romantic atmosphere. With a little time before the first movie started, John spontaneously stood and offered his hand, dragging a curious Kaidan over to the jukebox for a slow dance while Nicky and Boo cleared their leftovers. The biotic was charmed and immediately pulled him close, resting his head on John’s shoulder as they swayed together.

They stayed like that until the projector flickered on for the movie outside and they got snacks and found a classic red Fusion car to sit in. It was mostly just a frame with the seats left, the dash converted into an area for drinks and food to rest. Nicky crawled into the backseat as they snuggled up front and fought to keep their kisses and touching PG. When that didn’t satisfy, John pushed at Kaidan to recline on the bench seat as he settled into empty space left by the missing steering column.

Nicky peered over from the back and they froze, John’s hand caught in the middle of pulling his boyfriend’s pants down and Kaidan’s hands flying down to cover himself. The dog gave them a bit of side eye before ‘woofing’ and leaping out of the window to wander over to the row of doghouses near the towering screen. They watched her go, before they giggled together and shared a kiss and got back to it.

John had chosen the car more for its location than design, and soon he had his mouth on his boyfriend’s dick, stretching where Kaidan was wide, messy, wet lips obscene on the head as he looked up to watch for reactions. God, he had to stop too soon. The biotic hadn’t always been very loud, but the longer they were together, the easier it was for John to find his hot spots. Climbing on top of him, John muffled the other man’s moans and gasps with a kiss, taking the leaking cock in hand to finish the biotic off.

As soon as Kaidan was limp and panting against his mouth, John cleaned him up and made him presentable. They snuggled and watched the movie for a bit as he recovered, some cheesy sci-fi thing that was in black and white, until Kaidan’s hands started wandering. And damn, he loved how warm those big hands were as they snuck under his pants to grab at his ass.

“My turn.” Kaidan’s husky whisper should have been a warning rather than a promise and John was SO glad Nicky had taken off already. Because he knew how to keep quiet and his boyfriend was going to take full advantage of that.

Sure enough, the biotic was a man with a mission. Lowering the bench seat again, Kaidan kissed John, tongue plundering in as his hands tugged down his pants and pushed at his shirt. And then John had the absolute pleasure of watching the other man crawl down his body, biting at his pink nipples first and that tongue fucking down into his belly button. One hot hand gripped his cock, sliding lazily as the other reached down to roll his balls, thumb rubbing at his perineum gently.

Trying to keep his quick breaths even, John let small gasps and grunts fall from his open mouth as Kaidan left hot kisses and little bites on his abs while his hand stroked him, the tip of his thumb circling the large mushroom shaped tip and dipping into the slit. John’s eyes were eagerly on Kaidan, whiskey brown eyes met his as the biotic sucked his fingers into his mouth, plush lips pursed over the digits until they left to reach down....

It took everything in John not to do more than one low groan that stretched on as the fingers rubbed against his hole, sliding back and forth and teasing. Just teasing and playing with the muscle and skin. And then Kaidan was smirking as he lowered his mouth over his dick and a finger finally breached him.

“Fuck,” John hissed, lifting his hips and rolling them into Kaidan gently, arms braced against the seat as his thighs and glutes strained. He was going to be sore in interesting places tomorrow.

Those brown eyes were smug before they looked down at their task and focused. John watched that hot mouth move lower, deeper and deeper over him, felt the finger thrust and rub inside of him, frustratingly avoiding his prostate. He whined as the fingers retreated, only to return with what must have been a lubricant tablet and then two fingers entered, fucking him slowly as slurping filled the car in-between explosions on the screen.

Keeping the blowjob tight and wet, Kaidan started rubbing over that little nub with purpose, eyes looking up to meet his...and just as John could feel his orgasm starting to uncurl in him, Kaidan glowed blue, sending small sparks over him with gentle zaps, and John had to immediately turn his head to bite into the seat as he hollered.

FUCK. Fuck.

John was only distantly aware of Kaidan cleaning them both up thoroughly, panting with his eyes closed and feeling lightheaded. “You asshole,” he happily muttered.

“Mmm, no. Your asshole.” Earning a hysterical laugh from John.

Kaidan curled back around him after retrieving snacks. There was another movie on after the sci-fi finished. An early edition of Blasto, but they were tired and ready for bed. They left halfway through the movie, collecting Nicky and Boo, and quickly fell asleep curled around each other.

The next morning they had breakfast at the same diner, laughing and making plans for the day when someone came to stand by their table.

Looking up, mouths full of food and John’s face still damp from coffee that Kaidan had sprayed over it when his boyfriend’s cold foot got fresh with his junk, they saw a friendly enough looking man in a long tan duster and a militia hat with one side pinned up, a laser musket holstered across his back.

“Hey, you guys wouldn’t happen to be John and Kaidan, would you?” His voice was soft, eyes kind, dark skin flush from spending the morning outside.

Swallowing his tato tots quickly, John nodded. “Yes, we would.”

The man smiled and petted Nicky as she poked her head out. “I’m Preston Garvey. I heard you were looking for me?”

Kaidan quickly slid over to John’s side of the booth and offered his seat to the man. “Uh, yes, we were. I didn’t think we’d be seeing you so soon though.”

Preston slid in after propping his weapon up against the seat. “Steve sent me a message from the Castle. Some things came up in Sanctuary, so I’ll have to stay for longer than planned, but it’s not far from here. How can I help you guys?”

The boys shared a look and then John turned back to Preston’s curious gaze. “I heard you’re a bit of a history buff. Have you ever heard of a man named Councilor David Anderson or Admiral Anderson?”

“You mean, from before the war? Steve mentioned you were both frozen like him,” Preston spoke. “I’m sure you guys would get along well, sharing old war stories. Yeah, sure. He was some sort of hero in the war against the reapers, right?”

“He was more than that,” John spoke lowly, heart heavy. “He’s the one that got us as far as we did in the war, he was the one to pull the trigger on the reapers.”

Preston laughed. “I heard you had quite a hand in all of that. Your crew, too. Your sister had a lot of her own stories to share before she left. But still, it’d be great to pick your brains about it, update our files and stories around the campfire.”

“Well, I don’t think you knew this, but he’s your great grandfather.”

The Minuteman seemed at a loss for words.

“EDI sent us some information. The overseer in my Vault was Kahlee Sanders, Anderson’s fiancée. She was pregnant with your grandad when the reapers blew. And I hate to dump this all on you, but I wanted to meet you.” John smiled wistfully. “I’d like the chance to get to know what’s left of him in this world.”

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There’s a mod called ‘Kiss Me Arse’ that’s for your PipBoy’s radio that plays all this Irish music. It made me fall in love with Dropkick Murphys and helped build Shepard.
> 
> Steve was my first (and truly only) SS I made for FO4. I was definitely still in my Captain America phase. He loves dogs and totally romanced every single companion that you CAN...and wanted to romance the hell out of Gene. 
> 
> There was so much they changed before releasing FO4. I’m still mad you can’t take over the BoS. Everyone lives in my fics, because it makes me happy. Lyons lived and my LW Charlie (from FO3) showed up to smack sense into Maxson.
> 
> Basically this entire fic is a pile of happy ending HCs. Hope the information overload wasn’t a hot mess.


	11. You’re Listening To Diamond City Radio

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life starts to settle for the boys and John’s family expands.

“Save me from fuckin’ moody teenagers,” the words were growled softly and the ‘moody teenager’ ignored them like they both knew he would. The wind was turbulent and determinedly tugged James McGraw’s red hair from it’s small ponytail as he turned to Shepard. “All right kid, we’re going to go make the drop and come back for you when it’s time to resupply.”

Shepard grunted and huddled into his jacket against the wind, face stinging with the chill off of the choppy water, coffee clutched close. The drink was too hot, but Shepard had been taking sips anyway, burning his mouth without care. The whiskey in it traveled like fire down his throat to warm him like his beanie and scarf couldn’t.

McGraw eyed the cup, but wouldn’t say anything unless Shepard gave him reason to. Since being taken under the wing of the Captain and his husband with their adorable fleet of historical ships (a front for their Robin Hood, do gooder smuggling), he’d come a long way from his black out drunk days in the Reds.

“Just do us a favor and don’t get arrested this time.”

“Asshole deserved it.”

“I’m not saying he didn’t, Johnny. I’m saying- Don’t. Get. Caught.”

“Whatever you say, Capn’. Worse comes to worse, I’ll offer the cop a blowie.” Shepard smirked and watched in his peripheral as the pirate gave up with a roll of his eyes and walked away.

McGraw’s husband, sweet and compassionate Thomas, wanted kids one day. Shepard would pay to see what that was like.

The thought startled him distantly - that he would want to be there, that he cared, still, after everything he’d been through since his dad died.

The harbor they were berthed in was far enough away from Reds territory that he wasn’t worried about running into anyone he knew, so he started down the dock and headed north along the water. It took thirty minutes in the biting air, but he reached his destination where the stink of the harbor was left behind for fresh salt. A lighthouse could be seen in the distance as he found a new, smaller dock and a small main street full of shops.

Going past the dock, he climbed the coastal rock and sat down away from the tide pools where it was dry, boots dangling yards above the surf. Gulls cried overhead but kept their distance (he didn’t have food) and a couple of seals trying to catch the last rays of the day watched him warily a short distance away.

His dad had died here.

Not right here on the rocks. No, this was where mini Shepard had come to find his solace away from the crime scene. Where he’d listened to the surf to keep his breathing even when he ran out of tears, where he couldn’t tell if the salt he tasted was from him or the sea.

They’d been having their ‘guy’ day while visiting relatives in Boston. They had just come back from fishing and were having lunch in a small nook (root beer floats and fries with vinegar) when a man started arguing with his father. Shepard had just come back from the rest room and couldn’t really tell what they were fighting about, but the next thing he knew was that his dad was on the ground and the stranger was gone.

No kid should have to hold their dying parent. His dad had seemed horrified, worried for his son. He clung to him and tried to speak as he bled all over his nine year old. Before someone could think to pull Shepard away, his dad was gone, eyes that looked exactly like his staring at nothing. When the sirens started echoing against everything, he was pulled from his trance and managed to wander off. He was later found here by the small search party they’d formed when they noticed he was missing.

Years later in Aunt Aeryn’s kitchen, he found out it had been a hit, a warning to his mother in the investigation she was leading. He’d been left alive, not that that seemed to matter to her as she spiraled in her obsession with work.

“Had a feeling I’d find you here one day.”

He hadn’t seen Jane in almost a year. She’d been gone for at least a month on a job for the Reds when he left without leaving a message for her.

The feeling inside him could only be described as empty. They’d only had each other for so long, had trusted only each other. Their differing personalities would incite fights that never lasted more than a day. All that love, all the turbulent feelings towards his ‘big sister’?

Gone.

“John Boy?” There was a definite tremble to her normally steadfast voice. So much like their mother. He suddenly hated that nickname more than ever.

He didn’t care. Didn’t bother to acknowledge her in any way, as he searched for a way to leave now that she’d encroached on his sanctuary.

Small rocks tumbled and crunched and then she was kneeling beside him, looking young and terrified when he finally looked down at her. The auburn hair she had inherited from their mother was the longest he’d ever seen it. Her face was paler than normal, her green eyes bright.

“I just. I need to KNOW. John Boy, are-“

Something in him snapped and he stood abruptly, almost sending her into the sea. As it was, she scrambled, hands cutting on the sharp rock and barnacles as he got the hell out of there.

It took everything he knew to lose her and it helped that she didn’t know his goal was the set of docks with the old East Indianman Galleon that was in the middle of it’s restoration. He arrived at the ship, wood thunking under his boots as he finished his second coffee of the morning, this one with more whiskey.

Thomas saw him first, smiling brightly until he was near enough to smell the booze. Before the frown could form on his gentle face, old James McGraw was there, spying the look on his face and ushering him along to get the ship loaded with the requisitioned supplies.

“Who found you?”

Shepard stared down at the crate in his arms a moment. “My sister.” His voice was hoarse and he didn’t bother to see their reactions, just double timed it so they could get out of there ahead of schedule and back ‘home’ to Maine.

Not that it mattered a day later.

Over forty six thousand islands in Maine, and she finds the one McGraw owned for the warehouses they used for dry docking. His ‘guardians’, who had found him drinking on his father’s grave all those months ago, were having their date night while Shepard finished up some sanding for the next day.

It was at that point he realized he was either going to have to run forever or face her. Covered in wood dust and god knew what else, he went to McGraw’s tool chest and removed the bottle of rum stashed inside. Taking a fortifying gulp or three, he turned back to her.

“What?”

“Don’t WHAT me, John Bo-“

“Don’t ever call me that again,” he hissed. The sudden change from indifference to seething fury stopped her in her tracks. “You don’t have the right.”

And there went her temper. “I don’t have the right? God, I’m SORRY, ok?! I’m sorry! I never meant to be gone as long as I was, but I didn’t do it for NOTHING. I had a deal-“

“A deal with O’Rourke? The man who wouldn’t know an honest word if it jacked him off?!”

Jane’s lips pinched together, guilt in her eyes even as she hollered at him. “Yes! YES O’Rourke! I was his heavy, the one that ‘fixed’ things for him when no one else could manage. I was VALUABLE. I made myself that way. He wouldn’t risk-“

Snorting, Shepard took another swig of the rum, wandering around the warehouse as a buzz settled over him. “Maybe he just suffers from short term memory loss then.”

“He won’t ever again.”

Stopped in place, he turned back to her, leaning so much as he did that he had to catch himself on the hull of the rigged ship or risk falling. “What?”

“He’s dead. Doyle. Murph. Kate. All of them.”

“You... What?”

They stared at each other, until Jane charged forward to grab the bottle of rum and drank. And drank. And then...

“I came back. Finally. After I’d been pushing to get home.”

“They were NEVER home.”

“Shut UP.” It was her turn to hiss. “YOU’RE home, you little asshole.”

It was probably not the time to correct her on their height differences.

“I came home and you were gone and NO ONE was talking, but there were rumors. Oh god!” A noise between a choke and a gag escaped her and she drank more rum. “Fucking rumors, each one worse than the last and no one I could trust. And then I finally pissed off Doyle.”

Tears were running down her face and she angrily wiped at them. “I pissed off Doyle and he showed me the tape.”

That didn’t sound good. Closing his eyes, he leaned his head back against the rough wood and slid down. Recalling that last night, he thought he remembered O’Rourke saying something about ‘recording for posterity’.

“John B-John?” She ventured closer, tentatively, as if afraid of spooking him.

“Knowing those assholes, it’s probably not as bad as it looked.” But dear god, please let her be overreacting. That was NOT something he wanted her to see, ever. Or anyone.

Something inside her seemed to crumble and the next thing he knew, they were curled around each other, crying and getting steadily more drunk. An hour later, Thomas poked his head in to drop off dinner for them.

That year they enlisted, desperate to change their lives for the better. McGraw insisted it was the right move, but warned them of the hard work ahead.

  
~*N7*~

“And to think I get to see this happen all over again. Kid, you’re as crazy as Steve.”

John tried not to shout in his excitement; he’d save that for after they survived. While he realized he lost all credibility when jokingly asking Nick Valentine if a deathclaw was a dinosaur the first time he saw one, he wanted to maintain some professionalism around the guy. The synth detective acted like a quirky uncle with a dry sense of humor and working with him to complete some of the quests Steve didn’t have time for anymore was a dream.

The general of the Minutemen had explained he wasn’t the actual Nick Valentine, the one John grew up reading about and even met once, but an android-like synth with his memories downloaded to him. This Nick was one of the good guys he’d trust to watch his back, the guy was a good shot and even better hacker.

“You need a little bit of insanity to do great things.”

The synth side eyed him, the glowing yellow eyes something he was still getting used to the sight of. “Wise words. Philosopher?”

John grinned widely at Nick as Boo tried to get comfortable in the tricorn hat the Captain had gifted the former commander, probably looking the part of crazy. “Famous punk rocker.”

“Ah, musician. Pretty much the same in my book.”

The captain, a huge sentry bot with an old captain’s hat, rolled over to them and John was once again amazed the small tank even fit on the frigate. “You boys ready for this?”

“Aye, aye Cap’n!”

“Great! Let’s get her underway! Bosun!” The mammoth robot headed for the main mast, shouting orders this way and that.

John really wished Kaidan was here to see this. His boyfriend had been helping to fix the rockets and hull on the old ship to get her to finally break free of the skyscraper it was trapped in and back in the sea. Steve had already helped the robots once to get the ship this far, but with his ever-growing plate as the general, had not been able to return to help them finish. The few months they’d been in the commonwealth had been spent working with all the different factions to rebuild.

“You sure about this? I’m pretty sure we can watch this train wreck from another building.”

“Come on, Nick! It’ll be fun. Besides, you never know if they’ll need help as we go.”

Nick sighed deeply, so human for such an inhuman looking person. EDI had befriended him and gotten the second generation synth repaired, but he refused to upgrade to a gen three body. Apparently EDI herself had gotten one after befriending the Railroad to help rescue synths and he couldn’t wait to see her human-like body.

Below their feet the wooden deck started to shake as the rockets came online and Captain Ironsides started the countdown. John took a deep breath and looked out over the ruins of Boston from an incredibly tall height. From up here, it all looked the worse for wear: destroyed buildings and torn up streets that would take years to repair with the amount of people left behind. But further out to sea, it looked the same.

The same great expanse of blue with the sun glimmering off of it and gulls drifting on the wind.

“Too bad Kaidan couldn’t be here.” Nick was watching him with a small grin. “But I think you’re doing the right thing. Any healthy relationship calls for time apart. Pretty sure even the dog was getting sick of your sniping.”

Slouching, John pouted and braced his feet as he took a sip from a Nuka Dark and set his Omni-Tool to record the experience. The alcohol infused soda was probably not a healthy choice, but helped to ease the anxiety he still got when he was away from Kaidan too long. “Yeah. It’s almost like a divorce without the marriage, with the way we split up all the projects we were working on together. But you’re right.”

He turned and winked at the Commonwealth gumshoe as the ship started shuddering forward off of the building that cradled it. Nick clasped his worn fedora to his head to avoid losing it as they gained speed and both of them held tight to the rope anchoring them to the mast. “The sex is still incredible as ever, though.”

Nick’s chuckle was almost lost in the wind as they picked up speed and went sailing through the air.

Eyes sharp on the other building tops, the whole experience was exhilarating as they sailed between tall buildings, waiting to see if they’d make it over the rest of the city and into the harbor. Tali had helped them with calculations and rocket engine designs from Meridian, so the worry was minimal. And god, it had been good to see her face, finally after all these years. The quarian was doing well in the controlled environment without her suit and Garrus was almost as happy about it as her.

They started losing altitude the last leg of the journey and John’s stomach did a small swooping as backup rockets fired underneath to get that last bit of air time and then they were going down in a barely controlled fall. “Here we go. Ready, Nick!?”

“Son, I was made ready!”

The floatation devices Tali had them attach to the bottom of the ship deployed right before they hit the water, softening the landing as huge waves crashed over the sides of the ship’s railing. John went down laughing as the water side swept him, with Boo squeaking furiously and running to hide under his shirt.

“We did it!”

“Good job, kid.”

“Thanks,” John said as he accepted Nick’s help up. “But I just got the right people talking to each other.”

“Don’t sell yourself short. It’s a gift not many people have.”

“Mmm. Would you still say that if I said I wanna do that all over again?”

The synth gave him an indulgent smile. “Yep. You’re a little crazy, but I’ve been told by some that crazy is just happiness with benefits.”

“Happiness, huh? Maybe that’s why so many people associate love with craziness.” Suddenly, John wanted to see his boyfriend. The biotic should be back from his own mission and helping with the Salem settlement. Waiting for him to finish his.

“Truer words have never been spoken.”

They went over the ship to make sure she was still in one piece. There was damage, but they’d taken enough precautions that it was easily manageable. They got the worst covered by sundown. Nick headed back to his office in Diamond City to give the scoop to a reporter friend and John rode the Fusion up the coast the long way to Salem.

Some roads would have been quicker, but as eager as he was to see Kaidan, the sight of the ocean to his right as the sun set was a sight to behold. Some part of him was still that nine year old boy would always believe his dad was watching just on the other side of that horizon.

Turning up the radio, he started speeding a little faster, always on the lookout for any surprises the wasteland might have for him on the road.

“~*That was Atom Bomb Baby by The Five Stars. And now for the news! Seems our new Alliance friends are helping the Minutemen build their settlements and recently...shut down a deathclaw breeding farm? I don’t even have words, folks, except ‘why’? I guess some people just can’t be helped.*~”

John smirked, remembering that day and the sheer look of horrified incredulity on Kaidan’s face when he mentioned taking one of the babies home to train. They didn’t end up keeping any, but they did find a place for them in the Glowing Sea. Ahead he could see the Kingsport Lighthouse in the far distance and knew he was getting closer to home as he gassed it, urging the bike to go faster.

“~*It seems the General of the Brotherhood has decided to leave a small outpost here and return with the rest to help efforts in New York. Paladin Danse has been promoted to Sentinel and has been left in charge for the time being. Also, recent reports have declared Salem a temporary hot zone.*~”

Heard thudding, John turned the radio up further and pushed the Fusion as fast as it would go on the curving roads.

“~*While the deathclaw hiding out in the old Museum of Witchcraft has been dealt with, it seems that the mirelurks have not been cleared out as previously thought. The settlement was just recently attacked by a mirelurk queen and her spawn. Casualties have not been confirmed, but I have been told the queen is dead and the rest of the mirelurks have retreated. The Minutemen will send word when they’re finished clearing out the new nests-*~”

Tuning the rest out, John smacked at his Omni-Tool and tried not to lose his balance on the bike. “EDI! EDI, are there any new messages from Kaidan?”

“I’m sorry, there are no available messages. But we are still out of distance of the nearest tower.”

“FUCK.” They passed the lighthouse and he could see the settlers fighting with the Children of Atom again. Normally he’d stop to assist, but not now. Tonight, they could handle their own shit for once.

They got closer to Salem and EDI spoke again, just as visions of a mile high mirelurk queen spitting acid-like venom at his boyfriend’s barrier started plaguing him. “New message from the Major.”

“Read it!”

“The subject reads Mirelurk Attack on Salem, Nicky and I are fine. The message goes on to give a full report, but does not go into detail regarding his injuries. They seem minor, however, and I believe you’ll find them at the cottage.”

That was going to be his next question. Passing the exit for Salem, he followed the road a bit and spotted the coastal cottage they’d been fixing up on the fly as they stayed there during their current assignment. They were still trying to figure out their future plans, not wanting to make any solid decisions until they at least heard from EDI, if not his sister.

The place was set in the side of a cliff, opposite the ocean on the road and they’d been fixing it up in between projects. They’d had to camp in the garage until the first floor was repaired, but in the months since they arrived in the Commonwealth, it now had a second floor and even the beginnings of a garden. Turrets and dogs both guarded the small house from creatures that wandered down from the hills and the sea, and it was far enough away to give them the privacy they craved.

The Fusion flew up the dirt driveway, and since it didn’t have the sidecar, it fell to the ground as he hopped off in his hurry. Nicky heard him and poked her head out the upstairs window, body wiggling in excitement as she climbed out onto the porch roof from their bedroom, letting out a small ‘boof’.

Before he could run inside, a familiar silhouette poked its head out the window and finally John could breathe again.

“Johnny?” The voice was raspy with sleep and Kaidan’s hair was a delightful mess as he yawned and did a small stretch while he looked down at his boyfriend. “Hey. How’d the launch go?”

“You! Stay right there.”

That woke up the biotic a little more, but John was already running into the house, dodging the curious noses of the junkyard dogs they’d fostered. Kaidan was waiting for him at the door to their bedroom, rumpled in his boxer briefs and John’s hoodie, concern on his face.

“John, what-“ He was cut off with a kiss, the taller man pulled him close and then cradled his head against his collarbone. Kaidan’s arms came up around him, warm hands running along his back in comfort. “I’m ok. We had a few close calls, but nothing some Stimpaks and Medi-gel wouldn’t fix.”

“I’m never leaving you again.”

“As much as that appeals to me, there was a reason we started taking breathers.“ Yeah, reasons like John not getting tato tots for a week because Kaidan was mad at him.

“Because you’re so fucking stubborn all the time.”

“Yeah? And you can be a total jackass sometimes.”

Nuzzling down into those frizzy dark curls, John sighed. “Yeah, ok, I give you that one.”

Kaidan smacked his ass in retaliation.

“New plan: we prioritize the communication projects. I can’t go through that again.”

“All right. First thing tomorrow.”

“Well,” John released him to kiss his nose. “Maybe not first thing tomorrow.”

Sure enough, they let themselves sleep in. The mirelurks weren’t actively attacking Salem and the settlers were waiting for reinforcements from the Minutemen before clearing the nests along the water. Old Rook’s turrets discouraged any stragglers that got curious.

Waking with Kaidan in the morning always felt terribly domestic. Even back on the SR-2 they had their morning routines. But in the wasteland, it was vastly different, for the fact that they had TIME.

Time to savor waking up together, popping refresher packs to kiss each other hello.

Time to hunch over coffee or tea and slowly rid themselves of mental cobwebs.

Time to make love and all that romantic BS that John didn’t find stupid anymore.

This morning they woke as the sun shone in through the window from over the water across the street, causing John to whine in protest as Kaidan buried his head under his pillow. Coffee wasn’t automatic, not out in the wasteland, but they made do with a hot plate they kept in their room and took turns getting out of bed to get it started every morning. And if they bathed before bed as they usually did?

Sex.

The sense of urgency for each other that followed them into the future had waned, but they still had sex all the time and this morning John savored the feeling of Kaidan inside him and the burn in his thighs as he rode him, gaze eagerly on the gorgeous guy between his legs backlit with the amazing view outside and the light it cast on the biotic’s copper skin.

And as they lay together after a quick wash, John caught sight of something completely unexpected.

“Kaidan.”

The sunbeam made Kaidan’s eyes turn to rich whiskey as they followed John’s gaze at the sound of urgency in his voice.

“Please tell me I’m not hallucinating this?”

“You mean the old ships?”

Just a few miles off the shore were a trio of ships, all very familiar thanks to John’s time with McGraw and Thomas. Old, creaking ships such as those with wind in their sails that shouldn’t be going faster than nine to fourteen knots.

There was a mad scramble as they dressed, the dogs barking outside as they sensed something amiss. They sent word to Salem they had to check something out and took off, always keeping the small fleet of sails in their sights. Nicky sat up front in John’s lap and mostly between the handlebars with no time to add on the side car, Boo perched in Kaidan’s hair.

The radio on the Fusion was tuned to Radio Freedom, since the Minutemen would have current news rather than the belated reports from Diamond City Radio. They tailed the ships through Boston until they saw them start taking in sail between the Castle and Spectacle Island, and they turned onto the bridge being built to connect the island to the mainland.

Half the bridge was old stonework that survived the Reaper’s fallout and the other half was new wood they’d added on to fix it for trade routes and it acted as a temporary dock for the castle. Last they had spoken to Steve, they hadn’t decided yet what to do with all the land on Spectacle, but it currently stored excess supplies and housing for the third generation synths freed from the Institute that had enslaved them before Steve had taken over as general.

No wonder John and Steve had hit it off, both had so much experience solving the world’s problems.

Parking the bike, they could see rowboats from two of the three ships already heading to the dock.

Each boat seemed overloaded with crates and manned by a few people at a time. As one of them got closer, John could see a woman in a modified Vault suit stand up, her hair a familiar cap of silver and her face a sight for sore eyes.

“EDI?” Kaidan asked.

“EDI!” John exclaimed.

Even from here, they could see her smile bloom in a way it never could on her ‘mobile platform’, the silver-blue lipstick making her teeth vibrant. As she got closer, they could see her new body had lovely olive skin and the goggles on her head were the exact same shade of her previous visor. As soon as the boat was close enough to the dock, she jumped out and ran over to them, throwing her arms around them both and even letting loose a small laugh as she pulled them close.

“You made it!” Her voice was the same except for the slight electronic cadence it used to carry. Remembering what Steve and the leader of the Railroad had told them about synths, her body was probably custom made.

“I like the upgrade.”

“It definitely has its perks. Jane will be so happy to see you once she’s returned.”

Letting her go was hard, but they both stood back as Nicky took her turn demanding attention and Boo curled up in her collar to sniff at her curiously. “Any idea when that will be?”

“I do not. They heard news about the Normandy’s crash site in Iceland and were determined to locate it. Liara went with her as well as Donnelly and the others. With their supplies, I assume they will be returning by the end of the season.”

More boats docked, crates and supplies being immediately unloaded before they headed back for more. A few people stayed behind to organize them and prep them for further transportation. Aside from EDI and one other, John noticed they were all ghouls. Most of them were wary of him and Kaidan, but didn’t come across as standoffish.

Made sense, with the way ‘smooth skins’ tended to treat them. But one ghoul in particular seemed curious about them and stopped what he was doing to wander over.

“It seems like you might have quite a few new-“ John trailed off as the ghoul came to stand with them, black eyes wide and vulnerable as he looked at them.

No, not at them. At John.

Something about the way he held himself, the gentle way he tilted his head. “Johnny?”

The voice rasped like a ghoul’s typically did, hard to discern what it may have sounded like before too much radiation turned him into what he was....but again, something niggled at John and he stepped closer. Few people had ever called him that and even fewer had gotten away with it

One of which was-“Thomas?”

“JAMES! It’s Johnny!”

Heart pounding, John turned to see another ghoul getting off a boat, one that still had his chin length red hair tied back at the nape of his neck. This one dressed a bit more flamboyantly than his counterpart, almost pirate-like. At the shout, the ghoul’s gaze snapped over to them.

Before more words could be spoken, Kaidan and EDI were stepping back to let the ghouls embrace the taller man as he fought to breathe.

And accept the fact that more of his family had survived the blast.

  
A part of him would always feel a little guilty Kaidan didn’t have that, but his lover had told him it was his family’s orchard that helped supply the Alliance Vault. That his mother and granddads had greeted the Normandy’s crew and gotten them ready for cryosleep. Kaidan always assured him he’d had time enough to say goodbye to those that raised him, that his mother left plenty of messages as he’d slept and she kept watch.

The Castle’s doors were opening to Steve and his people coming to assist and John grinned widely through his tears at Kaidan with his arm around EDI and Boo back in his hair and thought: finally.

Now all he needed was to see his sister again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chap, and I’m totally procrastinating about editing it. Eh heh.
> 
> God, just how many xovers and eggs does this make? Idek i stopped counting. Sorry this chap might be a bit of a mess, both betas were like wtf Shotce and I SWEAR I tried.
> 
> I kind of have an idea for a sequel, but I’m also trying to write an Aliens au. We’ll see ;)


	12. Blue Moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End.

Kaidan was nursing a small headache and idling more than working at the nav station by Joker, the orange glow of the equipment causing a soft enough light to make the view outside the Normandy crisp. They were still in the Local Cluster, having picked up the last of supplies on Luna base before continuing on the ship’s maiden voyage.

The other man hadn’t said anything since the biotic sat down, but there was definite side eyeing going on when the pilot wasn’t actively working.

Being assigned to the Normandy SR-1 was a dream for all of them and to work directly under a man like Anderson was an honor. The captain could be a bit old school, kept you on your toes and at your best, but he trusted and respected his crew.

Unlike-

“So. I know you’re not here for my charming comments on Adams’ latest upgrades, finally decided to commit to being my coffee errand guy? Cause I gotta say, as pretty as you are, I’d only keep you around for the good java.”

Kaidan glared at him, but it was half hearted at best. Sighing, he leaned back against the chair and allowed himself to slouch a bit. The ship may have been made for the Alliance, but it was designed to accommodate all race types and damn, the new ‘military spartan decor’ was more comfy than any military ship he’d ever been on.

“Yeah. Because I can follow simple directions.” The galley had a full coffee station with an actual brewer instead of the typical instant crap and the crew loved to take advantage of it.

“Not what I heard.”

Annnnnnd yeah. Kaidan totally set himself up for that one.

“Anderson might not be completely aware of the trouble in paradise, but he’s not stupid. It’s only a matter of time, man.”

Scoffing, Kaidan snatched the lidded coffee cup that he’d brought Joker earlier and stole a couple sips. Food and drink weren’t really allowed in the cockpit, but they made exceptions for their snarky pilot. At least since Anderson had been put in charge. “You know, we’ve all had to follow orders we weren’t fans of, or people, but we get the job done.”

Joker sent him another look, this time a smirk tugging at his mouth. “Yeah, I get it. But you KNOW Shepard’s got a point-“

Grumbling, Kaidan jabbed at the console, feeling like a petulant child as he drank more coffee.

“If the man wants to bleed out, maybe next time you should just let him. At least until he passes out, then you and Jenkins can just drag his ass back to the mako. Though you’d have your work cut out for you. Man’s huge.”

Laughing during his next swallow, Kaidan coughed until his eyes watered. “God, I think Spectre Shepard would kill me.”

“Hmm.” Joker snuck a glance back at the CIC where newly appointed Spectre Jane Shepard liked to hover over the action like a bat in the rafters. The Alliance hadn’t given her a ship and crew yet, but scuttlebutt said it was only a matter of time before there was a Shepard exchange.

Not that any of them thought the twins would go for it. The crew definitely got some major protective vibes off of those two, as much as they seemed to respect each other’s space a little too much.

The commander was easily closer to seven feet tall than he was six, with a striking face that was stoic more often than not and piercing blue eyes that flashed bright when he looked like he wanted to squish Kaidan like a bug under his combat boot.

But as intimidating at the commander seemed, there was something scarier about his sister. She was almost the same height as Kaidan and while she had a smirk for everyone with a matching wit, her green eyes looked like they were constantly issuing a warning.

She didn’t seem to like Kaidan very much either, despite her insistence on his posting.

“Think she’s one of those black widow types? You know, eat the male after sexy times?”

“Yeah, how about we not.” Kaidan could feel his ears burn, worried someone would overhear.

Joker forged on however, eyes twinkling in the dim yellow from the computers. “Unless your type is more the commander. Damn, the hate sex would be intense. Think he’d spoon after? But like, aggressive spooning. You’re probably the make-breakfast-the-next-morning type, huh? You must be a hit, when you’re not hiding.”

“I’m not hiding,” he hissed quietly, finishing off the coffee in petty revenge.

“Sure, dude. And next mission I’ll be driving the mako instead of dropping her.” Joker raised an eyebrow at his empty coffee cup.

“Over my dead body, Moreau.”

“Eh heh, hey commander.”

Kaidan’s body tensed as their XO appeared seemingly from nowhere. In another life, he’d have been a great Infiltrator, or even a Spectre himself. “Sir.”

The commander stared at him an extra second before nodding. “Lieutenant. All right, Joker. We’re picking up another Spectre before we head on out. Anderson’s sending you the new coordinates, time to show her off.”

“Aye, aye, sir.”

“Alenko.”

Kaidan was torn between snapping to attention and the temptation to Throw Shepard. “Yes, sir?”

“Dr. Chakwas wants you in the med bay.” The taller man shifted just a twitch. “She wants your assistance with the field supplies.”

“Aye, aye, commander.”

Shepard seemed uncomfortable. Karin’s subtle power move had to remind him of Kaidan’s own authority in the field as the medic, not that that was the only reason the two of them butted heads.

The other man always wanted to do the right thing, but usually the wrong way. It was like he had forgotten his own humanity somewhere and Kaidan fought him for the integrity he preferred to see in his commanding officers. Surprisingly, Shepard seemed to like arguing with him, rather than call him on insubordination.

A nod was shared between them and the commander strode off, garnering looks from the crew as his boots clomped against the ship’s floor. There went a man whose presence was impossible to ignore.

“Thank god for Karin, am I right?”

Kaidan returned the coffee cup and smacked the chair near Joker’s arm. “Maybe try not to piss off the new Spectre.”

“Sure, sure. Hate to see you go, love to watch you-“

The biotic stole the pilot’s hat, earning a squawk as he hurried to the med bay, smirking.

~*N7*~

The repairs to Revere Beach Station were coming along great. They’d turned the boardwalk into a bustling marketplace for the traders and local farmers and the row of houses beyond it were being filled with families again. The center of Boston was still being cleared of all hostiles, so all the small businesses were finding their way to settlements like this, taking over old warehouses and unoccupied houses.

After an entire morning and most of an afternoon of working on the extension of the boardwalk that would now lead down to a dock, John was taking a break. Lying in a hammock sideways with his feet against the ground, rocking slowly with the toe of his boot as Nicky napped on top of him. He was still feeling hot and flushed from the work, but didn’t have the heart to kick her off of him, so he suffered the heat silently and hummed quietly every time the slightest breeze from the sea caused his perspiration to cool.

Earth was still struggling to normalize her climates. Steve had told him that since leaving his own vault in the Commonwealth, he’d never seen anything other than sunny days or rain with the odd radstorm. Kaidan and Ashley said that up north there were flashes of extreme temperatures and even snow, and in the west it was pretty much just varying amounts of hot, sunny days and cold nights.

“Ooof!” Nicky perked up, paws immediately digging uncomfortably everywhere tender, before leaping off and sending him swinging. “You’re welcome!” John grumbled and stopped the hammock.

Eyes closed, he could still hear the settlers running about their business, the workers aiding him in the construction had mostly gone inside the diner for some Nuka Cola and the ceiling fans...

And he was completely aware of the fact that he was now hovering several feet higher in the air.

Kaidan barely had any uses for his biotics out in the wasteland, fighting wasn’t the same as it was during the war, but he’d refused to get rusty and had been finding other ways to hone his skill.

Like, for example, levitating his boyfriend while he rested. Anybody else and they wouldn’t have noticed, so good at this the biotic was now, he must have grabbed the edges of the hammock so John wouldn’t notice the playful zing of dark energy.

Voices came and faded, John’s sharp ears recognized that he was being moved towards the train station itself.

“What are yo-“

And then the hammock dropped on one side, spilling him down with an undignified yelp. Water caught him immediately, splashing everywhere and he quickly found his feet and came up sputtering.

Cheering sounded from all sides as John stared at his smug lover from the newly finished fountain, giggling uncontrollably in his childish victory, eyes dark in the sunlight and smile so bright he found himself mirroring it.

The crowd dispersed, going back to their business as Kaidan came closer, kissing him softly as John tried to figure out if he was upset or amused. Deciding on fond, he pulled his lover into the cool water with him and the biotic came willingly, as if he had planned exactly that.

Clever bastard.

“I see you guys finished early.”

“Yup.” Kaidan wrapped his arms around him, tangling their fingers together. “Wise Man said that they’re going to have a BBQ tonight, like the ones they’ve seen advertised on the old billboards. Asked a lot of questions about pre-war food and cookouts.”

“Did you warn him against burning the garlic?”

Kaidan pinched him on the hip, full lips peppering kisses on John’s neck. “I know for a fact you love my cooking, don’t front. Chakwas would be impressed with your body weight.”

“True, I haven’t had to use hot sauce in month-“ A warm mouth captured his and their embrace became a little less friendly for the public, but the settlers were all used to their PDA by now. “Mm. Ok, ok. What are we having for dinner?”

Dinner turned out to be a potluck. Settlers and traders alike brought goods to share and cook on the grills they’d rigged up. Clearing out the mirelurk nests in Salem had brought a lot of seafood to the table, which John happily ate with freshly made butter while Kaidan mowed through the kebabs one of the new restaurants had made.

Twilight came over the horizon, brightening the stars and causing the lamps on the boardwalk to cast a canopy of light over the bustling pier. Everyone from the nearby settlements had come the second word got out about the BBQ. With more warning, there could have been people from all over the entire commonwealth.

The two of them even had time to make tato tots as their own contribution. However, John’s duty had been strictly taste testing the differently seasoned ones.

“This is amazing.” John sucked at his fingers, manners be damned as he spoke to Wise Man and the other settlement leaders at their table. “You should do this once a month. Get the community together, everyone can show off their wares.”

Kaidan’s eyes lit up. “A farmer’s market, you mean?”

“Yes!” John snapped his fingers.

Wise Man leaned back, the picnic table close enough to the pier’s railing to support the ghoul as he pondered this. “It sounds incredible. A year ago, I never thought there’d be a huge community of smoothskins and ghouls to support such a thing.”

People were starting to clear away empty plates from the railings to put out dessert and despite being so full from the rich food, John’s mouth watered as he tucked a foot behind Kaidan’s. Nicky was making the rounds with Boo, begging for food and making friends, freeing their legs up for once.

Rylee, former vault 81 dweller and current trader in charge for the Minutemen, leaned over her own empty plate. “We can even do a fair every season. We heard about those growing up! Games and rides and trick or treating.”

“Oh, that’s Halloween. Trick or treating?” Kaidan looked at John for details. Halloween and other ‘traditional holidays’ hadn’t been big in his family. They’d done stuff from time to time, their own versions of popular holidays, but his parents had focused to keep some semblance of his mother’s heritage alive, despite being raised outside the First Nations.

“Fuck yes.” Already John was dreaming of caramel apples and pumpkin danishes. Meridian and the Alliance vault were distributing seeds and plants to everyone, now that they had enough to sustain themselves and their surrounding settlements. “We’ve got plenty of corn fo-“

“Excuse me, sirs.”

Looking up, John and Kaidan saw a young Minuteman dressed in uniform. Despite their ‘retirement’, the Minutemen and fellow factions still saw them as two of their own, as figureheads. It was nice in an emergency situation and frustrating in others. Steve thought it was hilarious that they shared his plight, now that Preston was officially the general and he was in his hometown of Sanctuary.

“The general wanted me to tell you that we got something on the radar. It might be the Prydwen, could be something bad. Whatever it is, it’s big and not returning our hails.”

They immediately stood up in perfect unison and John whistled for Nicky as they made their abrupt goodbyes and their way to the motorcycle. They found the husky already in the side car with a blissed out expression, probably mid-food coma, with Boo alert on her head, whiskers twitching curiously.

They only had on light armor, donning helmets as they straddled the machine, but the Castle had the best armory in the Commonwealth. EDI is radioed and by the time they made it there, riding the Fusion right up to the gate and inside, it was full dark. They tried to get their animals to follow, but both were unimpressed and simply lay back down again. Preston heard them and ushered them inside the walls to where his men and Paladin Danse were tracking a large shadow.

“It’s too big and shaped wrong for the Prydwen.” Danse nodded at them as they joined the circle around the computers. “It’s moving slow and steady, in a straight line. I don’t think it’s a creature of some kind, they’re usually more erratic in their movements.”

Preston gestured at the main screen, fingers tracing along the shape’s edges. “We don’t get too many big guys up here. Well, bigger than a mirelurk queen anyway. Is it possible it’s a storm of some kind?”

The question was aimed at Kaidan, but he shook his head. “I’ve seen some pretty nasty storms in my travels, but nothing that dense on a radar. Could it be a ship?”

John glared at the shape as it grew closer. “Hmm. McGraw or Ironsides would know better, but I don’t think so. Look, some of the edges are shifting.”

They all stared and saw the barely there movement on all four corners. As the mass got closer and closer, the shape got clearer, the lines more defined, but nothing recognizable.

But.

There was a feeling. It started in John’s chest and made his skin tingle in expectation. “Kaidan.”

“Mmm?”

Reaching down, John grabbed his lover’s hand and held tight as he met Danse’s concerned gaze. “Where was the Prydwen normally docked?”

“The airport, by the old terminals.” That made sense. The place had been cleared by the Brotherhood, still maintained as one of their outposts. The Minutemen usually repaired all of their big equipment there. It was one of the only places in the Commonwealth large enough for an airship. “You think they came back by alternate means?”

“It’s Jane. Call it twin voodoo, but I know it’s her. Keep the Castle on alert if you want, but I know the feeling of my own impending doom.”

Preston’s eyebrows flew up his forehead as Danse looked perplexed, both turning to Kaidan. “Ignore him. They’re always ridiculously dramatic about each other. Come on, Johnny.”

They sent new coordinates for EDI to meet them at and left.

John let himself be led away, getting behind Kaidan on the Fusion and holding tighter than he normally did as they flew across dusty roads around the harbor to the airport. Spotlights lit up the grounds outside the large building, the guards immediately recognizing them and letting them pass.

Charlie met them near the elevator to the old ATC tower, purple hair a mess from sleep and eyes bleary, but she’d remembered to put on the voice box around her neck so she could speak. Fawkes, her super mutant companion from the Capital Wasteland, stood behind her with their dog, eager for a fight.

“We fight?”

Yawning, the mute waved her friend off, causing the super mutant to pout and rejoin the guards on the perimeter. “Danse pinged me and said you thought your sister was coming??”

John felt speech an impossible thing, so Kaidan took charge. “Yeah. I have yet to find a reason to doubt their ‘twin voodoo’. Mind if we ride up and keep watch?”

“Knock yourself out. I’ll send out the word to clear a path and come up with some coffee.”

Glancing at his lover, Kaidan asked quietly, “Maybe whiskey too?”

A thumbs up was waved over Charlie’s shoulder at him as she disappeared into the other room. They walked through the small maze of Brotherhood supplies and rode the elevator up to the tower. The soldiers on duty nodded at them as they stepped out, before turning back to the patchwork equipment. Kaidan found a console with the migrating mass and parked them in front of it, still holding his lover’s hand as they looked between the dark sky over the darker water and the screen.

The moon was just a quarter full, but it was close and bright, reflecting off of the sea and the shores right by the edges of the airport, but it was a distant light that alerted them to a new presence. It almost appeared as if the stars were moving, but as the object got closer, it blacked out the other stars and the small lights grew that much bigger.

John’s hand was tight against Kaidan’s, their knuckles turning white as the Brotherhood started hailing again with only warbled static as a reply. Charlie rejoined them, leaving their coffee cups to the side of the console.

“Had to brew a fresh pot. We were out of whiskey, but-“

An eager hand reached out to snatch one and Kaidan had to lightly grip the wrist and slow it, lest John burn himself. But it looked as though both cups had a heavy dash of milk, so he let go and grabbed the other for himself. “Thanks, Charlie. Any word?”

The Knight shrugged and leaned against a cabinet to watch out the window with them. “I think it might actually be the Prydwen, but just in case it’s not an airship, we have people clearing the ground for a large transport and Danse has soldiers on standby.” She winked at them. “Just in case. Garvey’s got his men on the mortars and keeping the Commonwealth updated by radio, but my gut says this is just another drill. Fawkes, of course, is still pouting.”

The searchlights went on as the ship entered the harbor, but they didn't have much reach, catching on only small portions, pieces of a puzzle neither of the men could put together. Then as one, Charlie and Kaidan pointed at highlighted sections as she drew closer.

“Vertibirds! Maybe she took damage and had to-“

As the ship came close enough to berth, her floodlights lights finally snapped on and Charlie gawped as the men stared in astonishment.

There was the Prydwen all right. A large, cylindrical airship painted a matte black gliding into the airport. Multiple vertbirds were flying in steady formation around her to aid the airship in carrying the Normandy SR-2 herself. The Alliance ship looked like it’d been through hell, probably the initial blast from the Reapers’ very destruction, her designation was barely legible but no other ship had that silhouette.

“Is that...?”

“Yep,” Kaidan confirmed.

“Well, shit. Ok boys! Roll out the welcome wagon! Lucia, contact Danse-“

John snapped out of it and started running, Kaidan right behind him as Charlie barked out orders in her electronic voice. It was chaos outside, but chaos with a rhythm. Ryder was right about the BoS out here, they were better organized and trained, all of them with a purpose they were hurrying to complete.

Right now it seemed that task was getting the Normandy grounded to free up the vertibirds and their exhausted pilots. John and Kaidan took charge of getting it done until EDI arrived, no one on the ground knew the ship better than them and Charlie stuck by their side to help them.

The vertibirds wavered as soon as the frigate was secured and they watched as the lines to the Prydwen were dropped so they could finally land. EDI immediately hurried over to take stock of the Normandy and left them to it.

“What do you suppose those were for?” Charlie was wondering as her soldiers hustled to anchor the airship next.

“You said they were headed for Iceland?” Kaidan asked.

John’s eyes were sharp on the vessels, noting the people he recognized as they left the birds and the ones he didn’t. “The Prydwen is just barely long enough for the Normandy, but they needed the additional support of the vertibirds to get her here. They had to regularly change out pilots for rest on the way here-“

There, John spotted someone he knew well.

“Miranda!”

The ex-Cerberus officer’s head snapped up, eyes widening in delight as she spotted them hurrying over. She surprised them with a hug as they drew close, laughing as they parted, but before she could say anything, a small tornado hit them.

“Where the fuck have you assholes BEEN?” Jack growled at them, her smile just as bright as her lipstick as she violently showed her affection by punching their shoulders. “Jane’s going to fucking lose it. At best she was finally going to get laid-“

The wasteland had destroyed Miranda’s immaculate appearance, but she still was as lovely as ever. Jack looked almost exactly the same, but both men noticed how as they stood back to talk, the women leaned into each other.

“Janie?”

Miranda smiled softly at John’s inquiry and placed a hand on his shoulder. “She’s on the bridge and overseeing docking procedures. Should I radio her?”

John smirked and left with Kaidan rolling his eyes and following behind. They caught a ride to the airship on one of the vertibirds being sent up to collect the crew. A few people greeted Kaidan, but didn’t seem to know who John was until they saw the N7 paint on his body armor. Those people stepped back and started whispering as they watched them march for the bridge.

And there she was standing by the helm, going over a checklist with Oriana Lawson. She’d changed in subtle ways, her vibrant hair was shaved at the sides and had her own N7 painted armor, but she held herself the same way. Grunted angrily at the datapad when it didn’t do what she wanted the same way.

Sensing the people who entered the bridge hadn’t moved, Jane looked up to address them and froze. Eyes widening and mouth falling open, John just barely caught the sight of tears brightening her eyes before she was charging at them. And then they were a knot of embarrassing emotions and blubbering and laughing as Kaidan hugged them both as their anchor.

“I was surprised when they said you were on the Prydwen instead of the Normandy.”

Jane snorted and rubbed her wet nose on his shoulder, a disgusted John stealing her BoS captain’s hat in retaliation. “Not possible. Normandy is all but dead in the water.”

Kaidan sighed. “I guess-“

EDI came flying down the stairs, wiping at the tears glinting on her face as she beamed at them. “Jeff’s alive!”

John and Kaidan stared, uncomprehending as Jane let them go to hug her. “Hey, girl. You have yourself to thank for that.”

“WHAT?” Kaidan stared at her, breathless as John put an arm around him.

Jane smirked over EDI’s shoulder. “Joker managed to crash land in Iceland just before the worst of the destruction hit. He got hurt pretty bad, but EDI talked him through modifying a sleep pod so he could stick it out with the rest of us. She had to sacrifice all systems to preserve it and we almost turned it off by accident when we boarded, but he’s G-T-G. We’ve just got to get him to the Institute before we extract him. Miri and Chakwas think we can use nanotech to not only fix his injuries, but help with his vrolik’s syndrome.”

“Fuck. Me,” John whispered reverently.

Kaidan chuckled in his giddiness. “Mm. Maybe later.”

“EW,” Jane protested as only a sibling can, and tossed a nearby first aid kit at them. It was caught with Kaidan’s biotics and they all laughed a little too loud in their excitement of being reunited.

~*N7*~

Liara had come as soon as possible from the Vancouver Vault when she heard her lover had returned, all the former crew trickling in behind her. Even Wrex and Grunt arrived from the krogan colony deep in the irradiated wasteland. And why had no one told John he was an uncle? Kaidan looked a little ashamed, but admitted she’d just become pregnant when he and Ash left and was worried about ‘jinxing it’.

Jane had only known about the possibility of having a child and had burst into tears when she met little Bennie for the first time. Jane declared her brother and Kaidan the official babysitters and handed over the small blue baby when she wanted to drag Liara off to the private corners of the Commonwealth.

Never having been so close to an asari child before, John had been equally fascinated and terrified as he held her. Kaidan usually had to wait a long time for his turn, but enjoyed watching them as he did so.

“You ever think about kids?”

John looked up at him, startled, the warm look on his lover’s face making his heart swell. “I always thought I’d be a terrible father.”

Seeing Kaidan’s eyebrows furrow over those damn puppy eyes of his, John hastened to add: “Not because I think I’d mistreat them or anything, but my life has always been dangerous, Kaidan. I never even dared to dream about it, because I never thought I could have a life like we do.”

And damn it, that look in Kaidan’s eyes was going to make him cry. He refused to cry while holding a baby that was fascinated with the shiny bits of his clothing and cooing like a little bird.

“Which reminds me. Garvey has been plotting with Steve.” Funny to think the man thought he could actually retire from the Minutemen. “They decided to turn at least half of Spectacle into a outpost for the refugees that join up. Wanted to know our input and if we’d be interested in living onsite for the construction. Maybe even stay on as instructors?”

And there.

John watched as Kaidan fought to keep a blank face. “Maybe we can talk about it later, huh?”

“Ok.”

Yeah, not ok.

Any time John had brought up any long term plans, Kaidan had shelved the ideas for later. Even their brief discussion about kids hadn’t included references to their own children or future.

In the few months since Jane returned, they’d made headway on the repairs to the Normandy and her new mission to see what had become of the galaxy, and to repair satellites and local space stations. EDI was back online in the ship and fascinated with her new synth self. Joker was up and about, helping them and awed at his girlfriend’s new body. Tali and Garrus and every single squad and crew mate from the Normandy was reunited and working round the clock to get her mission ready.

Lists were being made for the continuing repairs and supplies. For the crew. Everyone knew it was probably a one way trip and the thought that he might never see Jane again was breaking him up inside.

The fact that Kaidan was acting so squirrely had him anxious, but he was too scared to confront him or his sister about the names on the crew list. The Normandy was already being tested, making short flights to connect with other continents and Kaidan had already gone with them a few times.

John, too, once. Just to be nostalgic and say goodbye to her properly. And collect his ship models.

“Hey.”

John escaped his spiraling thoughts to see the mild concern on Kaidan’s face. “Hey back.”

The biotic grinned and rubbed at his forehead with the back of his wrist. A nervous tick. “What do you say we go out tonight when the girls get back? You and me. Maybe even get dressed up a little.”

“Date night?”

Kaidan nodded, eyes fixated on Bennie as he played with her tiny fists and not looking at him. “Yeah.”

Swallowing hard, John nodded. “Yeah, sure. Got a place in mind?”

Because Kaidan was a romantic bastard, they got their own little space set up on the end of the dock at Revere Beach Station. The table was simple, the moon was full, there was candlelight and a waiter that was tickled pink to carry their food all the way out there for them.

It was hard to find decent clothing in the wasteland, but Steve’s friend Deacon had found him a vintage tux in good condition to wear. A little fancy, but he was glad he did it since Kaidan’s suit was just as nice with its crisp white collar and black cravat. As handsome as he looked, as enthusiastic as their lovemaking was that morning, their conversation was almost stilted all through dinner and right until dessert.

Until: “So, I know things have been awkward lately and that’s on me. I’m sorry. But I didn’t know how to do this and-“

“Marry me,” John blurted out.

Kaidan’s eyes widened, mouth dropping open as he struggled to form words. “What? You-“

“Sorry, wait!” Panicked, John toppled his chair as he hurried to kneel by the biotic’s feet. “I’m doing this wrong.” His hands were shaking as he pulled at the chain always around his neck to take off a ring beside the lone dog tag. “Ok. Let’s try this again.”

Holding up the ring, John looked up at Kaidan, voice trembling as he asked, “Kaidan, will you marry me?”

Tears formed in Kaidan’s eyes as his hands covered John’s, his own chair falling over and splashing into the sea as he kneeled with John and kissed him before wrapping arms around him. All John could hear was his hitching breaths and it made his heartbeat skyrocket. “Kaidan. Kaidan that’s not an answer.”

A small, watery laugh escaped from Kaidan before he whistled sharp and pulled back, kissing John’s forehead, the cheekbone below his left eye, the scar on his chin. Boo suddenly appeared, chittering excitedly as he hopped onto Kaidan’s offered hand.

There was some sort of harness made of ribbon on the space hamster and it tied a ring to his back. Suddenly, Kaidan’s nervousness made a different kind of sense.

“Yes. You beat me to it, but YES.”

Of course John started crying. “Fuck.”

“Why? What did you think I was going to say? You’re It for me, Johnny. I’m never going to love anyone the way I love you.”

Nose deep in Kaidan’s shoulder, he felt comforted enough to admit, “God, I love you so much. You were acting so suspicious I thought you were going with Janie.”

Kaidan’s arms tightened around him like a vice, like he might try to leave himself. “Never. Over my dead body.”

John untied the ring on Boo, setting his little friend free to eat the leftovers on the table and looked at the gleaming metal. “Is this a victory ring?”

Laughing, Kaidan kissed him. “I got it from EDI. Added some composite metal from the Normandy to the inside and had the stone reshaped.”

The blue crystal was now shaped in the form of a tiny wave and he couldn’t stop smiling down at it. Leave it to Kaidan.

Sniffling, Kaidan looked at his own ring. “I can’t believe you. I mean, I CAN. But, Johnny.”

Blinking, John looked into those dark eyes, partially gold from the candlelight. “What?”

The biotic’s smile trembled. “You didn’t think I’d notice your father’s missing dog tag?”

“It’s a good, sturdy metal. Comes with it’s own tracking chip so I can always find you. And he would have wanted to know you.”

Kaidan kissed him. Hard.

And then just as John started feeling dizzy, the other man was pulling them up. “Come with me.”

They waved to the waiter as they left, Kaidan assuring he well compensated him as they got on the fusion and rode out. John wrapped his arms tight around Kaidan’s middle as they flew through the streets, marveling at how far the Commonwealth had come as Boo snuggled and squeaked in the tux’s pocket. They passed settlements and different beaches, only slowing to make turns to keep close to the ocean.

The scenic route. Not up north to their home, but south.

When they got to the Castle, Kaidan finally stopped. The huge stone structure was closed up for once, only a skeleton crew guarding it outside as they parked the bike. Walking them over to the double doors on the north entrance, Kaidan stopped and gathered his hands to hold them against his heart.

“Everyone is leaving in the next week or so. What do you say to getting married? Tonight, I mean.”

John leaned his forehead against Kaidan’s, closing his eyes. “I’d say yes, but my sister will kill us both if she’s not there. And Ashley. Wrex would probably declare war.”

“Eh, we can round Jane and Liara up. Maybe the others, too. But Preston could marry us. What do you say?”

The smile on John’s face was so wide it hurt. “I’d say yes.”

“So. You know how I’ve been trying to avoid making long term plans?”

“Yeah? You weren’t being all that sneaky about it. Surprising, because your poker face is better than James.”

“Yeah, well. I didn’t want to ruin the surprise.”

“What surprise?”

Kaidan winked at him and knocked on the heavy wooden doors.

Immediately the doors opened in perfect unison and light and music spilled out from the inner courtyard to reveal the gathering of hundreds of people, all quickly settling into rows of seats that left an aisle through the lamplit courtyard to where Preston Garvey stood in full General regalia, grinning at them.

Jane and Liara stood next to him, holding little Bennie and dressed to the nines. All the old squad mates stood with them, flanking Preston as music started up.

“~Blue Moon!   
     Now I'm No Longer Alone,  
        Without A Dream In My Heart,  
            Without A Love Of My Own.~”

John stared in amazement at the flowers, the decorations, the people and organization. Nicky made a little ‘awoo’ noise at him as she came to prance in place beside them, a pillow fixed to her back similar to the harness Boo had worn. There was even a place to tie the rings on top.

Turning to Kaidan, he kissed him. Long and deep, to the cheers and cat calls from everyone.

“Save it for the ceremony, you dumbass!” Jane shouted at them.

Despite the jeers and teasing, a moment where Jane and John disappeared only to come back with puffy eyes, the wedding went smoothly. There wasn’t a dry eye, even the krogans grumbled to hide their sniffling.

The new husbands weren’t eager to go home yet, instead they stayed up all night with their friends and family until the sun replaced the moon above the ocean’s horizon.

Daylight found Kaidan laying sleepily against John’s side while holding Bennie, Liara and Jane across from them as everyone else started cleanup.

“I’m surprised it wasn’t a double wedding.”

Liara smiled, head against Jane’s. “We’ve made our own promises to each other. Perhaps if we return we’ll ask Kaidan to help us organize one.”

“When, you mean.” Kaidan murmured sleepily, shifting the baby carefully. “I have to admit, Cortez and Vega helped a lot. Deacon and his people, too.”

“That’s something Jane and I wanted to discuss with you, actually.”

“What?” John sat up, instantly alert as he glared at his sister. “You’re coming back. No running off to other systems to fight thresher maws.”

“Of course not, John Boy. But a spaceship is no place for a baby.” Jane stared wistfully at the bundle tucked in Kaidan’s arms.

“And by the goddess, there’s no way Jane is leaving me behind again. We want you to take care of Bennie while we’re gone.”

“Think of it as practice, baby bro. If Miri gets that project up and running at the Institute, you’ll have kids of your own someday.”

Kaidan looked over at John as silence reigned and everyone held their breath as the former commander reached out with a gentle finger to stroke her tiny cheek. “What about it, Johnny? How’s the tide?”

John kissed him and hugged his new family. “Full speed ahead.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh wow. FINALLY, it’s done. Sorry I took so long to post the last chap. I had to rewrite and my wonderful betas have been living full lives lol. One of them told me this made them want to play Fallout again, which, YAY. I tried to make this comprehensive for non-fallout players, I hope it worked.
> 
> Jeanne made LOVELY art of the boys, I sniffled. Find it here: https://jeannedarcprice.tumblr.com/image/179113845887
> 
> I have sketches in the works I myself for FE, just might add on at a later date as part of the series. I have ideas for a sequel, but don’t know how far I’ll get since I have all this other art and some other fic ideas in the works.
> 
> THANK YOU for taking this journey with me. Please feel free to say ‘hi’ at shotce.tumblr.com. I may be a hamster, but I’m friendly!!


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